


One Change (Connor's Brother)

by NukeRose, WritingIsLoveAndLife



Series: Connor's Brother [1]
Category: The Fosters (TV 2013)
Genre: Jonnor - Freeform, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-09-01
Updated: 2017-06-02
Packaged: 2018-04-18 13:30:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 12
Words: 50,282
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4707680
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NukeRose/pseuds/NukeRose, https://archiveofourown.org/users/WritingIsLoveAndLife/pseuds/WritingIsLoveAndLife
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>AU after middle of Season 2 finale. What if Connor wasn't an only child, and had an older brother to help him escape from Adam's clutches.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Jude's POV:

"...Are you gonna keep all the boys outside the door?" Lena argued, "You can try, but trust me if you do, you'll be the one who ends up getting shut out."

I sat beside the hospital door, feeling absolutely miserable. I couldn't even bring myself to glare hatefully at Adam Stevens like I so desperately wanted to. Actually no, strike that, what I really wanted to do was stomp on him, repeatedly about the head with a pair of Connor's baseball cleats, and then with one of his bats for good measure.

I had been here for an hour, and all I wanted to do was see Connor. He was my best friend. The only friend I had that counted. But the revelation that was Connor's officially coming out as gay seems to have only steeled Adam's resolve and strengthened his loathing of me to unseen levels.

And now this two hundred twenty pound troglodyte was trying to destroy one of the only good things I had in my life.

Why could I never catch a freaking break?

"I don't give a damn, he isn't going in!" Adam shouted.

As I could feel my own resolve start to shatter, a new voice joined the argument.

"Good god, you really won't be happy until he's as miserable as you are, will you?"

Adam's eyes went wide, and his body stiffened. Lena and I noticed this reaction, and slowly the three of us turned to seek out the source of the voice. When we found it, all the color drained from Adam's face, and Lena and I both did a simultaneous double take, because standing ten feet down the hospital corridor was a man who looked like a much older version of Connor. He was taller, more muscular, and had longer hair that covered his ears and curled at the ends. He was even dressed like Connor would normally dress, a flannel shirt and jeans, although the ones the stranger was wearing were black.

"Didn't expect to see me here, did you, old man?" The doppelganger hissed menacingly.

"What the hell are you doing here?" Adam hissed, quickly recovering his bravado.

Connor's doppelganger sauntered forward with a predatory look on his face that spoke of imminent trouble. Adam took a step back.

"Well, imagine my surprise," He said, "When I was awoken yesterday morning by a call from an unknown number, answering it to hear Connor on the other end, calling from a borrowed phone, begging for help, asking to be, and I quote, rescued. Honestly dad, did you learn nothing from the way I turned out?"

Wait, what?

Dad?

I leapt to my feet and slowly approached the newcomer.

"Who are you?"

He seemed startled that I asked him a direct question, perhaps not realizing I was there, but quickly recovered and reached out to shake my hand.

"Depends on who's asking?" He asked.

"Jude Adams Foster." I answered.

His eyes widened as he looked me over.

"Holy shit. So you're the legendary Jude?" He asked.

"You know me?" I asked, shocked.

"Let's just say that Connor has told me a lot about you." He answered, "He never shuts up you when we talk on the phone or on Skype. I thought you'd be shorter to be honest."

He released my hand.

"The name is Eric." He revealed, "Former Lieutenant Eric Daniel Stevens, United States Air Force. Connor's thirty year old brother, the man who is about ten seconds away from shoving a steel toed boot up our asinine father's ass."

"Connor never mentioned he had an older brother." I mentioned.

"That's because I'm a bit of a taboo subject." He said, "I left with our mom at the age of 18, and joined the Air Force. Escaped this abusive bastards iron grip in the process."

"Abusive my ass." Adam scoffed.

"THAT'S EXACTLY WHAT YOU WERE!" Eric thundered, cutting his father off, "You are a bigoted, over controlling, alcoholic mess of a man who can't help but try to ruin his children's lives. You may never have hit me when I lived at home, but the fucking constant tirades and emotional abuse was enough! But I hear you've moved up from that, have you? I saw a picture of Connor on Facebook. He had a cut and bruise above his eye. Care to explain that one, daddy dearest?"

"I tried to spank him..."

"And he fell and hit his head." Eric finished condescendingly, "All because he shared a tent with his best friend who you assumed was gay. Honestly, you are a lot stupider than I thought you were, which is definitely saying something. You're lucky I'm here alone, and that Mom didn't come with me. She would claw your fucking eyes out after all you've done to Connor. You've alienated your wife, your sons, your parents, hell you've alienated the whole family with your behavior. Now stand aside and let the fucking kid in to see his boyfriend before I throw you out of a fucking window."

It took me a second to catch what he'd just said.

"Wait, boyfriend?" I squeaked.

"What you two aren't together?" Eric asked, confused, "The way he talked about you, I assumed you were. I mean, he talks about you like you hung the freakin moon."

"Um. I don't really know what we are, to be honest." I admitted, but was cut off again.

"I don't want him anywhere near my son." Adam growled, "He's corrupted him! Turned him into a fucking queer."

"Connor was gay long before he came along, you ridiculous idiot." Eric deadpanned, "He had a crush on one of his soccer teammates when he was eleven. He tells me damned near everything."

Adam lunged forward and swung at Eric.

Eric ducked the punch and then he snapped.

He punched Adam right in the face, three times in quick succession. Adam lurched back into the wall and slid down to the floor, clutching his broken nose.

"You really think you could land a hit on me you piece of trash?"

Adam groaned in pain.

"I'll have you arrested for that..."

"Why? You threw a punch first, and he was just defending himself." I threw in with a smirk, "You'd go to jail, and you know what they do to child abusers in jail."

Eric noticed this and smirked as well.

"You, my dear boy, have a vindictive streak to be admired." He said, "I knew I'd like you."

We all heard a ding. Eric pulled out his phone, and smirked at what he read in the text message. Eric crouched down in front of Adam.

"You're through, old man." Eric growled, "You've been played. Everything you just said has been recorded and heard by a family court judge."

Adam paled as Eric pulled a small stack of papers from his pocket and unfolded them.

"What's this?"

"It states that you are terminating all parental rights to one Connor Jason Stevens." Eric said, "If you sign them, you stay out of prison and don spend the next few years of your life being used as the local prison bitch by hundreds upon hundreds of extremely violent men."

"I could fight this..."

"Who do you think they'd believe?" Eric retorted condescendingly, "The washed up, alcoholic commercial real estate agent? Or the decorated veteran with an honorable discharge, his mother the nurse, and these two, a foster mother and her adopted son? Besides, now we have evidence, and with Connor's testimony, you're well and truly up shit's creek without a paddle."

After glaring at him for a moment, Adam snatched the papers from Eric's hands.

"I hope you burn in hell for this."

"I guarantee, that you will be there with me." Eric said, sadly, as he took the papers Adam just signed, "Now get out of here. And stay the hell away from Connor and Jude. If you go anywhere near them, I will know, and you will bleed."

Adam stormed off down the hallway, muttering under his breath the whole way.

Eric stared after his father with steely eyes, but as soon as Adam turned the corner and was out of sight, his demeanor changed completely.

His shoulders slumped, and his eyes immediately started turning red. It was obvious he was holding back tears as he rolled his jaw.

"Are you okay?" Lena asked.

"Yeah." He mumbled sadly, "Just hurts ya know? Hearing your father tell you you'll burn in hell. Ha. So much for unconditional love, huh? He's always liked me less than Connor. Guess having a kid at eighteen does that to a person."

He turned to me, wiping his eyes at the same time.

"Let's go in shall we?" He said, "I haven't actually seen him in a while either. Skype calls just aren't the same as seeing him in person."

I nodded as he moved to open the door and we stepped inside.

Connor was laying in the bed, watching television. He looked tremendously unhappy. He didn't even look over at us.

"Go away, dad." He snarked, "You've done enough damage for one day."

"Wrong people." I said.

His head whipped toward us so fast I'm surprised he didn't get whiplash.

"Jude! ERIC?" He exclaimed, "How... how did you get past dad?"

Eric looked at the floor.

"You won't have to worry about him anymore, little bro." Eric explained sadly, "Once you get out of here you're coming to live with me and mom. He's finished. He can never hurt you again. I promise."

Connor's face dropped slightly, but nonetheless, he released a small sigh of relief.

"Good." He mumbled, "Not that I'm not glad to see you bro, because I am, but can I speak to Jude alone please?"

"Yeah, sure." Eric said, "I'll be right outside talking to Lena."

He offered the both of us a small smile and exited the room, shutting the door behind him.

I turned back to him, and he offered me a grin which I returned.

"Hey." He said.

I laughed.

"Hey." I said.

I approached the bed, and he took my hand into his, caressing my knuckle with his thumb. He noticed my nail polish, and looked up into my eyes.

"What's this?" He asked.

"War paint." I said.

He grinned at that, which I returned with a small smile of my own.

He scooted over in the bed and I crawled in next to him.

We laid there for a few moments, just enjoying each other's company, and that fact that we were finally reunited. Connor finally broke the silence.

"When did our lives become a soap opera?" He asked.

I snorted.

"It sure seems like it doesn't it?" I asked.

"I'm really glad you're here." He said, "You know that right?"

"Yeah, the grinning kind of clued me in." I teased.

He blushed.

"You had any other visitors since Taylor?" I asked.

"Yeah, Daria came up to visit."

I tensed.

Daria. The eternal thorn in my side.

"She did?" I asked coldly, "What did you guys talk about?"

"I broke up with her, Jude." Connor said simply.

I looked at him surprised.

"You... you did?"

"I admitted to myself, my dad, and you that I was gay, Jude." He deadpanned, "Of course I broke up with her."

"How did that go?" I asked.

"I didn't tell her why." Connor said, "Just told her we were over and I was sorry. She started crying and stormed out."

"What a shame." I said, not sounding the least bit sympathetic.

"Do I detect jealousy?" Connor jokingly asked.

"Yes, I would say you do." I retorted.

Connor sobered immediately.

"Yeah." He said, "I've really screwed things up, haven't I?"

"Don't beat yourself up about it, Connor." I said.

"Kind of hard not to, to be honest." He said, his voice cracking, "I've been a really shitty friend, and I'm so, so sorry Jude. All the crap I've done in the last two months, I'm surprised you can stand the sight of me."

"You can't punish yourself for it..."

"The hell I can't." He cut me off, "I should have done this after I kissed you in the tent. So much bullshit could have been avoided if I'd just gone to my mom or Eric, told the truth and asked for help. I wouldn't have nearly destroyed our friendship if I hadn't been such a coward. It took me getting shot in the fuckin' foot to finally come out to my dad."

"Getting shot is punishment enough." I interjected, "Besides, I'm still here. You haven't lost my friendship. You'll never lose that... but we do need to talk about this whole situation."

"What do you mean?" Connor asked.

"Well, for starters, do you have feelings for me?" I asked, being blunt.

He blushed, and nodded slowly.

"Yeah, I do." He mumbled.

"For how long?"

"I don't know exactly." He answered, "I knew for sure after kissing you on the camping trip, but I had thought about it before. I don't know exactly when the feelings became something other than platonic."

"Fair enough." I said, "The feeling is mutual, if that wasn't clear enough already."

Connor snickered.

"Yeah, it kind of was." He said, "The constant bitch face directed at Daria was a bit of a clue."

I guffawed at that.

"I do not have a bitch face."

"Yes you do. It's an epic one too." Connor teased, "You could freeze somebody into a block of ice with it."

I slapped his shoulder jokingly.

"Hush you."

We fell into a companionable silence, until once again, Connor broke it.

"So... what are we?" He asked, turning his head to look at me.

I turned my head to meet his gaze.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"Well... we both admitted that we have feelings for each other." Connor said, "My dad isn't a problem anymore. So... what are we? Are we still best friends, or are we... more than that?"

"Like what?" I asked.

Connor's cheeks had a little pink tinge to them he spoke his next few words.

"Um... like maybe... uh. Dammit why is this so hard?" He cursed to himself.

"Why is what so hard?" I asked, amusement clear in my voice.

"I guess, what I'm trying to ask is..." Connor said, hope in his voice, "Do you want to be my boyfriend?"

It took everything I had in me not to burst into tears at that question.

I rolled over onto my side and pulled Connor into a hug.

"Of course I'll be your boyfriend."

A giant grin lit Connor's face and he returned the hug.

I pulled back from the hug and smiled at him. My eyes drifted lower to his lips.

I decided that I was tired of Connor always making the first move. Now it was my turn.

"Connor?"

"Yeah?"

"Can I kiss you?" I asked.

"Um. Yeah. Of course." He said, blushing slightly.

I leaned in slowly and pressed my lips against his slightly chapped ones.

The kiss was short, only about ten seconds long, and it was chaste, but it was the start of something new.

This was the End of the Beginning, and I looked forward to what my future held with Connor standing at my side.


	2. Chapter 2

The two boys lay together in the hospital bed, Jude lying comfortably at Connor's side. Both of them were in no small amount of shock over what had just occurred not ten minutes previously. They had finally won. The battle they had fought to be together was finally over. Connor glanced sideways to look at Jude. He was laying there, just enjoying being back in the company of his best friend turned boyfriend. Connor allowed himself a face splitting grin at the thought of that word. Boyfriend. It was so new, and it felt more right than anything he'd ever done.

"Why didn't you tell me you had a brother?" He asked.

"I don't know." Connor answered honestly, "It just never came up. I had enough on my plate trying to deal with the mess my dad caused for us."

No sooner had Connor answered, did the door open and Eric strolled into the room and around the bed to stand at his side. Eric stood there in silence for a short moment, just staring at his brother. Eric leaned down and gave his little brother a warm hug, placing a kiss to the top of Connor's head before pulling back and standing up straight.

"It's good to see you again, little bro." Eric said, with a small smile on his face, which turned straight to a frown as he examined Connor's bandaged foot, "I just wish it had been under better circumstances. Maybe next time a day at the beach with ice cream and a picnic could suffice, instead of having to do battle with our imbecilic father?"

"You still talk like that?" Connor asked teasingly.

"Like what?" Eric asked.

"Like a walking dictionary." Connor answered with a small laugh, "Talking all fancy."

"Mom calls me a wordsmith." Eric said, sticking his nose up in the air pompously, before cracking and laughing along with Connor, "Having a dual doctorate doesn't hurt things either. Besides, it's fun to watch people struggle to understand my intricate speech."

"Yeah, right. Anyway, it looks like you had things with dad handled well enough, Eric." Connor pointed out, "How did you manage to build a conspiracy against him since I talked to you on Taylor's phone yesterday?"

"You really doubted me when I said I would call in the cavalry?" Eric questioned, "Yee of so little faith, when have I ever let you down?"

"Never, but I figured it would take you at least a week." Connor said.

"Well, yeah. Normally, it would have." Eric said, "But luckily, I'm smarter than our father will ever be. The simple answer to your original question is that I didn't raise a conspiracy. I tricked him big time."

"What do you mean, you tricked him?" Jude asked, speaking up for the first time since the conversation started.

Eric sashayed across the room, and retrieved a chair from beside the bathroom door. He pulled the chair up to the side of the bed that Connor lay on. He plopped into the chair, and kicked his legs up onto the bed, taking care to avoid touching Connor's damaged foot. Eric smiled, a smile that one would typically expect to see adorning the face of a certain clownish Batman villain.

"The whole thing about the conversation being recorded." Eric explained to the two boys, "And a judge hearing it? It was a crock of the finest bullshit currently available. It was a con."

"Who was the text from then?" Jude asked curiously.

"Our mom." Eric answered lightly before turning back to Connor, "Anyway, I made up the story before I even left the house. Once I fed it to Dad, I told him the only way to make criminal charges go away was to sign his parental rights over to mom."

"Is that even legal?" Connor asked.

"Not entirely sure, to be honest." Eric responded, quirking his head in thought, "Probably not, but it worked. Either way, it got results."

"Is mom coming up to see me soon?" Connor asked, his voice small.

"She should be on her way up here now." Eric revealed, "I sent her a text after I finished talking with Lena."

"How much... how much does she actually know?" Connor asked, his voice wobbling on the verge of cracking.

"She knows that dad wasn't treating you correctly." Eric answered, "She doesn't know about you being gay, if that's what you're asking."

Connor closed his eyes tightly, and took a deep breath to calm his nerves. His grip on Jude's hand tightened and Jude winced slightly. Connor caught the wince out of the corner of his eye and relaxed the grip.

"Sorry." He said.

"It's okay." Jude answered, "I've had worse. I can handle a bit of tight hand holding."

"What does that mean, you've had worse?" Eric asked curiously.

Jude winced, and Connor again noticed.

"Um, Eric. It's kind of a touchy subject. He doesn't like to talk about it." Connor explained.

"Connor. I'm fine. I can talk about it." Jude interjected softly.

"You sure?" Connor asked, "It's just, you have enough trouble talking to me about that stuff."

"I'm sure." Jude responded, giving Connor's hand a squeeze, "It helps to talk about it, anyway. Reminds me that it's truly over."

"O-Okay. If you're sure about it." Connor said softly.

Jude gave him a small smile, as if to say thank you for Connor's concern, before sitting up in the bed and turning his head to meet Eric's curious gaze.

"Up until about a year ago, I was in foster care." Jude said, "When I was six, my dad drove drunk, and it killed my mom and the driver of the other car. We didn't have anybody to take us in, so my sister, Callie, and I were put into the foster system. It, uh... wasn't pleasant. Not even a little bit. My family, the one that adopted me, they were the seventh foster home I'd been put in. They say seven is a special number. A lucky one. Well, I guess they were right, because I hit the fricken jackpot on my family. I have two moms, who love me more than anything. I have two older sisters. I have two older brothers. I love them more than anything."

Jude had started shaking, as the memories of his experiences in foster care, long since buried, crawled from depths of his mind to rear their ugly heads.

"The uh... first foster home we went to... they were actually really nice." Jude continued shakily, "But we had just lost our parents. Callie ruined that home for us. It was too hard for them to handle the both of us. The second home wasn't good, but it wasn't the worst either. You could tell that the foster parents were only in it for the money from the state. They forgot to feed us a lot. I remember gnawing through a raw potato one because I was so hungry."

"That's atrocious" Eric deadpanned.

"I know it is." Jude agreed, "We got moved when the teachers at school noticed that Callie and I were way too skinny. We were in the hospital for a while. They told us we were malnourished. Our third foster home was the first one I was ever really scared in. The foster mother, her name was Marion. The vile bat would scream at us and slap us for the smallest things. She swung at me with a hot curling iron because I took about a minute too long brushing my teeth. She didn't miss, and she still sent us to school the next day."

"Are you fricken serious?" Connor blustered in outrage.

"Dead serious." Jude deadpanned, "Anyway, the teachers noticed the burn and called the cops. Her foster license was revoked, and she went to jail for child abuse. Our forth foster home was even worse than that. It was another one that Callie got us removed from, and thank god for that. The foster parents were fine, but two of our three foster siblings scared the crap out of us. There were three boys. Colin, Charles, and Benjamin. Callie and I called Benjamin 'Benjji'. He was cool, he was the oldest. He was fifteen. Tall, red hair, skinny. I might have had a crush on him. I was only twelve, so I didn't really think about it until much later."

"What was wrong with the other two?" Connor asked, curious.

"Colin and Charles were creepy." Jude continued, "Just really creepy. Reminded me of the brother from American Fable. Really sadistic. Demented and sociopathic. The kind of kids who torture animals for fun. They were the same age as me. Benjji told me that I should avoid being alone in a room with either of them, at all costs. After a couple months, I was getting really scared, and I told Callie this. Benjji and Callie plotted, and Benjji hid a piece of his mom's jewelry. Callie gladly took the blame for its disappearance and we were moved. Benjji wished us luck, and told us to look him up when we were somewhere safe."

"Our fifth foster home was terrible." Jude continued, "Our foster parents were a couple of condescending old swine who should never have been allowed to hold a foster license. I broke my arm while I was there, and they wouldn't even take me to a hospital until Callie begged them. We were moved, and they were charged with neglect. Our sixth foster home was the last one before I found my family. The foster father's name was Jim Pearson."

Jude paused, looking suddenly unsure, before turning to Connor with a pleading gaze.

"Now, one thing I'm going to mention might seem kind of weird," Jude said cautiously, "So I need to know you won't freak out about it."

"I promise." Connor said, looking scared to find out what it was about.

"Callie and I were home alone, and I was really bored." Jude said softly, looking uncomfortable, "I was looking for something to do. I was snooping through Jim's closet, and I found this box. It was a dress that belonged to his ex-wife. I don't what possessed me to do it. I just remember thinking it was a pretty color, so... I uh, I tried it on."

Jude looked at Connor once he said that, gauging his reaction. Connor didn't even blink.

"What? Why are you staring at me?" Connor asked.

"Aren't you going to say anything about that? The uh... the dress thing?" Jude asked cautiously.

"Why would I?" Connor asked in confusion.

"Well... I'm a guy." Jude answered nervously, "And I tried on a dress... which isn't exactly normal..."

"So what? Like I've ever cared about normal. Normal is relative." Connor said, waving off Jude's concerns.

"So, you don't think I'm weird?" Jude mumbled hopefully.

"It's not that weird to me, Jude." Connor said, "I didn't care when you wore nail polish, and I don't really care if you want to wear a dress. If you like it, then more power to you. Hell, if you still want to wear them, I'll fricken buy you one."

Jude looked touched at Connor's words, and smiled and laughed softly.

"Nah, it's fine. It was a onetime thing, and I didn't like it." Jude pointed out, "It was uncomfortable as all hell. Like, seriously. I tried to walk in it and tripped over it."

"It was probably like eight sizes too big." Connor pointed out, "If it was your size, it probably wouldn't have been so uncomfortable."

"Haha, yeah." Jude laughed, before swallowing and continuing, "Anyway, I tried it on, and then he walked in and caught me."

"Oh no." Connor moaned.

"Yeah, it was bad. He grabbed me by my hair and dragged me out into the living room." Jude recalled, wincing at the memory, "He started punching me, kicking me. Callie tried to stop him, but she got hit too. I curled up into a ball, and he kept beating on me. I thought he was going to kill me. I literally thought I was going to die, until we heard glass shattering outside."

"What was that? The glass shattering?" Eric asked.

"It was Callie, taking an aluminum baseball bat to the windshield of his precious car." Jude said, a small malicious smirk on his face.

Connor barked a vicious laugh.

"Never let it be said that Callie doesn't have style." Connor said.

"Yeah. I thought that too, until he called the cops and had her hauled off to Juvie." Jude continued, "The cops wouldn't believe either of us when we said she was defending me. That was the first time Callie and I had ever been separated, and Jim was trying to keep us from having contact. She went from Juvie to the Fosters, and she and Brandon came over about a week later. Brandon knocked on the front door, and pretended to be lost while Callie snuck in the back door. Of course, Jim turned around and saw her. He started yelling, and pulled a gun out of a drawer and started waving it around. That's when Stef and Mike came bursting in and arrested him."

"How did they know where you were?" Connor asked, confused.

"They followed Callie and Brandon, I think. I'm not actually sure, I never asked." Jude said, "But that was the end of the nightmare. They adopted us a few months later."

"I can still remember the party after the adoption hearing." Connor interjected, "Right before we went to bed that night, you pulled me aside and gave me a hug. You thanked me for being such a good friend, and apologized about Maddie again. I told you that I was glad you were my friend and that it would never change."

"Jesus Christ, Jude." Eric exclaimed softly as Jude's tale concluded, "I'm glad you're finally safe and happy, but how in the hell are you still sane?"

"I found my family." Jude answered without a second's hesitation, "My forever family, and my first real friend."

Jude and Connor shared a look. The corner of Connor's mouth quirked skywards, and after a moment's hesitation, he timidly put an arm around Jude's shoulder and gave him a tentative squeeze. Jude smiled at him and did the same, relishing in the simple joy and thrill that the new kind of physical affection with Connor seemed to elicit.

Eric's facial expression changed while Connor and Jude were having their moment.

"What all did dad do to you?" Eric asked, his voice just barely hiding the anger that lurked beneath the gentle facade.

"After hearing all that Jude went through," Connor said uncomfortably, "It makes it seem like I barely suffered at all."

"Suffering, no matter the quantity and intensity, is still suffering, and is equal in its level of atrocity."

It took Jude and Connor a moment to understand what exactly Eric said, because of its complicated wording.

"Well, Dad never actually... you know, beat me or anything." Connor mumbled uncomfortably, "He smacked me around sometimes, sure. But he never actually beat me up. Not physically, anyway."

"What do you mean, not physically?" Jude asked cautiously, making eye contact with Connor.

"He would... call me names, and say things... and stuff..." Connor said nervously, looking to Jude for reassurance that was immediately given by the younger boy.

"What kind of names? What kind of things?" Eric pushed.

Connor tensed at the demanding for answers, which Jude immediately noticed. Jude gently inserted his hand into Connor's and grasped it tightly.

"He... would call me weak. He would call me worthless. Stupid." Connor stammered quietly, "Waste of space and money. He mocked me for wanting to be friends with you after he banned it because he thought you were gay. After I came out to him. He called me a... I don' want to say it."

"Why?" Jude asked softly.

"It insults us." Connor answered, "It insults Stef and Lena."

"It's okay, just say it. We need to know." Jude assured him.

Connor rolled his jaw, which Jude knew was a tic that only happened when Connor was nervous or under emotional distress.

"He c-called me a... a faggot." Connor stammered, looking nauseous at having to speak that foul word, a tear leaking from his eyes and migrating south towards his chin, "Called me a q-queer. A h-homo. He started ranting, called me an abomination, called me wrong."

Jude took in a breath, and closed his eyes, trying to calm himself.

"He blamed you, Jude." Connor continued tearily, looking anywhere but at Jude, "He said it was all your fault. That you turned me into a freak. He said he was gonna pull me out school, send me somewhere to have me fixed. I tried to defend you, but he s-slapped me and stormed out of the room."

Jude rotated his head, and cracked his neck. He looked extraordinarily angry. In fact he looked furious. He took another calming breath and looked at Connor.

"Connor, I want you to look at me." Jude said.

Connor's gaze remained anywhere but where Jude asked for it to be. Jude raised his hand, and gently took a hold of Connor's chin, turning his head to meet his soft brown gaze.

"I want you to listen to me very carefully, okay?" Jude asked.

Connor nodded, wiping the tears from his cheeks.

"There is nothing wrong with you. Do you hear me?" Jude said sternly, but softly at the same time, " Yes, you are gay. But you are not a freak. You are not sick. You are not an abomination. There is nothing wrong with you. You don't need to be fixed. You are a wonderful person. You are my best friend, and now... you're my boyfriend too."

Jude blushed slightly upon speaking the word 'boyfriend'. Connor smiled, and laughed.

"God, that's gonna take some getting used to." Connor pointed out, "Being able to say that."

"You're telling me." Jude said, "I'm not complaining though."

Connor's face suddenly paled, and he turned to Eric.

"You said I was coming to live with you and Mom?" He asked fearfully, causing Jude to look in confusion at the tone of Connor's voice.

"Yeah, why?"

"That's in Los Angeles." Connor answered.

"Not anymore." Eric answered back, "Another thing dad never mentioned. Mom and I are moving back to San Diego. It's been planned for two months."

"Oh." Connor said, looking relieved, "Thank god for that."

There was a knock on the door.

"Come in." Eric said.

The door opened to reveal Lena, who entered and noted Jude's close proximity to Connor. She smirked knowingly, and raised a curious eyebrow at the two boys, who smiled and laughed while blushing furiously.

"So, can I still trust you two to share a room when he stays over, Jude," She teased lightly, "Or does he need to get acquainted with the couch?"

Eric guffawed.

"You, my dear woman, will get along with our mother just fine." Eric said, hugging Lena with the light of mischief in his eyes, "You should compare notes."

Jude and Connor looked confused. One could tell that they realized what she meant at the same time, because the pair turned an interesting shade of crimson.

"Really, momma?" Jude groaned, "We've only just kissed for the third time twenty minutes ago!"

"Oh? And if the first was in the tent, when was the second?" Lena asked curiously.

Jude's eyes widened.

"Uh..." He responded.

"It was my fault, Mrs. Adams-Foster." Connor said, leaping to Jude's defense, "He confronted me about this mess when I stayed over at your house the last time. I didn't know what to say, or how to respond, so I kissed him."

"It was innocent, though. Chaste." Jude added, jumping back into the conversation.

"I know, boys. I was just teasing." Lena said through her laughter, "I trust you both more than I trust Jesus or Brandon. At least you two can't get each other pregnant."

The color change that the boys' faces endured was very fascinating to watch. Their faces slowly cycled from the color of three day old porridge, to a crimson color reminiscent of a freshly cooked lobster.

"Anyway, enough teasing." Lena continued, "Jude we need to go. Mariana's dance competition starts in a couple of hours and we need to get ready. We'll talk about you riding your bike up here, all by yourself without telling anybody where you were going later."

Jude turned to Connor and gave him a soft hug.

"I'll see you later, okay?" Jude said, "When are you supposed to get out of here?"

"The doctors said the day after tomorrow at the earliest." Connor answered.

"Okay, well... I'll call you tonight." Jude said, smiling softly as he was led from the room by his mom.

***********

The next evening, Connor and Eric were sitting in the hospital room, talking about random things, when the door opened and Jude entered. His hair was a mess, and he looked tired.

"What happened to you?" Connor asked worriedly.

"Our family's inability to have a boring day." Jude said, "Jesus, Mariana, and Anna were in a car accident."

"Shit, are they okay?" Connor asked, a small amount of fear painting his voice.

"Yeah, they're fine." Jude assured, sitting on the bed next to Connor, "Jesus is the worst, he got knocked out by the impact, but other than that he's just got a few cuts and bruises. The glass from the window cut his head. Nothing serious, but any kind of cut on your head bleeds like crazy. He woke up in the ambulance on the way here, and started complaining about the neck brace, so he's obviously fine. Mariana wasn't hurt at all. Anna's having the baby, and they're putting her in a neck brace just in case."

"Oh, that's good then." Connor said, heaving a sigh of relief, "How long are you here for?"

"A couple of hours at least." Jude answered, rubbing his forehead, "They wanna do a bunch of tests to make sure Jesus doesn't have a concussion or worse damage to his head."

"Huh, bet he loved hearing that." Connor commented dryly.

"Oh yeah, I guess complaining at the top of his lungs is his way of saying he loves something." Jude joked sarcastically.

"Oh, how bad was the lecture from your moms?" Connor asked.

"Lecture?" Jude asked, looking confused.

"You know, about coming up here without telling anybody by yourself." Connor prompted.

"OH! Oh yeah, that. It was all very stern until I let it slip that you were my boyfriend now." Jude said, "Then Stef just started hugging me, telling me how proud of us she is."

"Who all did you tell?" Connor asked, "About us being b-boyfriends now, I mean?"

"Just Moms and Callie." Jude answered.

Connor paled slightly.

"Oh, god. I bet she hates me now." Connor croaked.

"She doesn't hate you. She said she was happy for me, and to be careful." Jude said.

The door opened, and as if summoned by their conversation, Callie's head peaked in. She took one look at Jude and Connor laying together, and turned her head back behind her and spoke to somebody standing in the hallway.

"Yep, he's in here." She said, and opened the door.

She entered the room, and was followed inside by Stef, Lena, Brandon, Mariana, and Jesus. Jesus had bandages on his face, and was obviously sore, but other than that he looked okay. Connor stiffened where he sat, and Jude looked slightly confused as Connor gulped fearfully.

"Hey Connor." Callie said, pulling up a seat, "How you feeling?"

"Um... honestly I'm expecting to be punched at any second." Connor mumbled.

All of the siblings looked incredibly confused.

"Why would you get punched?" Jesus asked, his eyebrow furrowed.

"Jude could have been shot that night." Connor said miserably, "He probably would have been if I hadn't pushed him in front of me when I saw the gun. It's my fault he even snuck out. I could have got him killed..."

"Oh yeah. Trust me, the thought ran through our heads at first, Connor." Brandon said sheepishly, "But yesterday after Jude got back from visiting you up here, he told us about some of the problems you've been having with your dad, although he wouldn't give us too many details. He really only told us that your dad was the main problem, and he told us that the only reason you guys snuck out was to spend time together."

"Connor... everybody makes mistakes, man." Jesus said with a shrug, "Doing stupid things is part of being a teenager, although I wouldn't recommend making a habit of this kind of thing."

"We won't." Connor interjected quickly, "Trust me, it won't happen again. If it wasn't for the painkillers, I'd be even more of a mess right now. Hurts like a bitch... pardon my French."

"Well, you got shot. If you weren't in pain, I'd be concerned." Mariana sassed jokingly.

"Yeah." Connor said, sighing, "It's been a long couple of days."

"What exactly did happen with your dad, Connor?" Mariana asked curiously, "Because I know for a fact that he isn't him."

She pointed at Eric as she spoke.

"No, that's my brother, Eric." Connor said.

Eric nodded at everybody.

"We are glad you're okay, though." Brandon said, "Jude was miserable because he wasn't allowed to see you. Why was your dad trying to keep you apart, anyway?"

 _"Ah, so the moment finally arrives."_ Jude thought to himself, and sighed.

He rested his head on Connor's shoulder. The family caught the motion, and when Connor put an arm around Jude and rested his head against Jude's, the two male siblings, who hadn't been told of the newest development in Jude and Connor's relationship, looked on in confusion. Mariana covered her mouth the prevent a gasp.

"Okay... I'm confused." Jesus said, "I knew Jude had a crush on Connor, but..."

"You didn't think it was mutual?" Connor finished for him, "Yeah. It is."

"So does that mean...?" Brandon started to ask.

"That I'm gay? Yes, it does." Connor said, proud of himself from not stammering over the first three words, "That's why my dad was trying to keep us apart. I told him I like Jude. I came out to him. I told him I was gay."

"Wow, and if I didn't think your dad was a bastard before..." Jesus commented.

"Jesus." Lena scolded half heartedly, "Watch your language."

"No, let him Lena. He's right, and we're all thinking it anyway." Stef said, steaming in outrage at Adam's behavior, "Connor, I'm so sorry you had to deal with that."

"It's fine..." Connor started to say.

"No, dude, it's really not." Brandon cut in, "It's never fine for a parent to treat their kids that way."

"Especially not because the kid is gay." Mariana commented, entering the conversation, "Your dad is... he's... ugh, I can't even think of an insult appropriate enough."

"A troglodyte? An imbecile? A Neanderthal? A foul, unpleasant, bitter, loathsome, homophobic cretin who deserves to have his face caved in by the repeated impact of a shovel or an equivalent blunt object?" Eric listed.

Everybody stared at Eric.

"That last one was really specific."

"I try." Eric said, giving a joking bow, "I'm going to go make a phone call. I'll be back."

He made a swift exit, leaving the young couple alone with Jude's family.

"Needless to say, he's lucky he's not here right now." Jesus said to Connor, "I can't stand people like that. I'd have to introduce him to some of my wrestling moves."

"I reserve the rights to the pleasure of getting the first punch." Jude deadpanned.

The door to the room opened, and Eric re-entered the room, tucking his cell phone into the pocket of his flannel.

"What is it Eric?" Connor asked.

"I actually need to ask Stef and Lena something really quick." Eric said.

"Go ahead." Stef said.

"Mom and I are taking Connor in," Eric explained, "We live in L.A, and we just bought a new place down here. It's not ready for habitation yet, and it won't be ready by the time Connor is released tomorrow. I hate to ask, but I need to know if he could stay at your place for a few days until we can get the new house ready to be lived in."

"Of course he can." Lena said without hesitation, "He's always welcome in our home. He's already practically part of the family anyway."

"R-really?" Connor asked, surprised.

"Yeah, man." Brandon said, "You're Jude's boyfriend. You date him, you get stuck with us too. Sorry about that."

Connor laughed.

"I think I'll survive." He joked.

"Where is he gonna sleep?" Jesus asked, "I'm not gonna have to give up my bed again am I?"

Jude glared at Jesus, making him cease his speaking.

'Well, before, Connor would just sleep in the bed with Jude, but I don't think that's a good idea now that they're together." Stef said.

"Oh, come on." Jude whined, "It's not like we're gonna do anything! I'm not Jesus."

"Hey!" Jesus exclaimed.

"Oh don't act all insulted. You know it's true." Jude sassed at his brother, "How many times did you lock me out of our room to have phone sex with your girlfriends? It'll be fun to be able to kick _you_ out of the room for some alone time with Connor. Give you a taste of your own medicine for once."

The brothers started bickering, completely ignoring the simultaneous seven way snort of laughter from Mariana, Callie, Brandon, Stef, Lena, Connor, and Eric. Then Connor caught the meaning of what Jude said, and his eyes widened to the size of saucers while his cheeks turned crimson.

"As long as you're not shove your tongues down each other's throats twenty four seven, I don't care." Jesus said crassly.

"Don't be ridiculous, you buffoon." Jude snarked, "Not every teenager is ruled by their hormones, unlike you. Besides, Connor and I haven't even kissed with tongue yet. Just being able to kiss period is new enough, French kissing can wait."

"Oh, so you have kissed before then?" Jesus exclaimed, half teasingly and half accusingly, "See? It's already started! They're already getting busy!"

"We've kissed a grand total of three times, you hypocritical dunce." Jude deadpanned, "First one was months ago in a tent in the middle of the woods during the school trip. Second one in my room after I shouted at him, and the third one yesterday after we made it official. So, yeah, we've _really_ been _getting busy,_ huh?"

"You say that now, but just you wait." Jesus said.

"Yeah, maybe in a couple of years," Jude said, the sass turning up just a little bit, "Right now, we're perfectly content with hugging and a bit of innocent kissing. Unlike you, Mr. 'Unprotected sex at fifteen'."

"How did you find out about that?" Lena asked, her eyes wide at hearing the last sentence.

"Never underestimate the power of eavesdropping." Jude said.

Jesus looked at Jude with an impressed look on his face.

"Well played, little brother. Well played." Jesus conceded.

Jude smirked at him. He stuck his nose playfully into the air, affecting an arrogant air that really just made him look silly. He cackled, which immediately made Connor snort and cover his mouth to attempt to contain the laughter that was bubbling up his esophagus.

"Well, well. He's admitted defeat!" Jude said imperiously, "That doesn't happen very often. Bow before my power!"

Connor snorted again, which turned into a guffawing fit of laughter. This set the rest of the family off, and soon the whole room was consumed with mirthful giggles.

Connor looked at Jude as the smaller boy practically rolled around in the bed from his laughter. Connor stopped laughing, and set about memorizing the smile on Jude's face. Smiling softly, Connor caught Jude's gaze.

"What?" Jude asked, smiling back, "What did I do?"

"Nothing, I just... never realized how, uh... cute you were when you laughed like that." Connor said, stammering over the compliment and blushing furiously.

"Ugh. You two are way too cute." Mariana grumbled jokingly.

Jude's blush equaled Connor's in intensity. The two were staring at each other, and Jude found that he did not care that the whole room had stopped laughing and were now observing them. Jude smiled, and leaned in to press a soft kiss to Connor's lips. Connor kissed him back, getting lost in the feeling of his lips moving against Jude's. Jude pulled back first, the both of them breathing unevenly. Connor heaved a deep breath to calm himself. The two just stared at each other for a moment, ignoring Mariana's adoring look, ignoring Stef and Lena's 'awwing', ignoring Eric, Jesus and Brandon's playful eye rolling. Jude leaned back in, and put both arms around Connor, pulling him into a soft hug.

"Jesus is right." Jude said softly, "I can definitely get used to that."


	3. Chapter 3

"FREEDOM! Finally! FREEDOM IS MINE!"

"Connor... we haven't even left the hospital room yet."

"Why such a buzz kill Jude?"

"You're a dork."

Jude and Connor stood together, Connor leaning on crutches with a cast and boot around his injured foot. Connor was bouncing on his good foot, eager for his brother to return and rescue them both from the oppressively bland hospital room. Jude was watching his boyfriend with a mixture of amusement and teasing exasperation. Connor had been walking around in circles with his crutches the whole time the two had been waiting.

"I know that." Connor answered, "I've never said I wasn't. Besides, being a dork is fun, and you like it."

"Oh, I do, do I?" Jude asked teasingly.

"Yeah, you do." Connor said matter of factly, "Otherwise you wouldn't be dating me."

"This is true." Jude admitted, "I still can't believe it."

"Yeah, me neither." Connor admitted, "I keep thinking I'm gonna wake up and this'll all have been a dream. The only upside to that happening would be not needing these."

He gestured to his crutches. He gave the offending objects a look of pure disgust and hatred.

"Hey, it could be a lot worse." Jude soothed, "And you'll only need them for six weeks."

Connor's eye twitched.

"Six weeks too long." He complained, "These things are too bulky! They're uncomfortable."

"Well, would you rather have a wheelchair?" Jude asked, raising a single perfectly formed eyebrow in inquisition.

Connor immediately ceased his complaining and cringed at the thought of being confined to a wheelchair.

"Ugh." He said, "I would just as soon jump out of that window."

"Then stop complaining!" Jude said exasperatedly, "And don't joke about that."

"I was just joking, Jude." Connor said.

"Yeah well, if you don't remember, you COULD have died that night, Connor." Jude snapped.

Connor's eyes widened as he realized his misstep.

"I... I'm sorry, Jude. I didn't realize..." Connor started.

"We both could have been killed." Jude said softly, "You have no idea how scared I was when I heard you scream and hit the floor. You weren't moving, and there was blood and... I thought you were dead, Connor, until you started moaning in pain."

Connor winced, and the memory of that night came flashing back.

**The gun went off with an almighty BANG! and Connor immediately felt a burning, agonizing pain in his foot, and he collapsed to the ground with a scream. He temporarily lost consciousness.**

**Jude, having made it out the door, whipped around and saw Connor sprawled out on the floor. He froze in horror. He saw the blood, and bolted back into the house with no concern for his own safety. Taylor and Daria stood at the back door staring at the scene in horror. Daria's eyes were wide with terror and she had a hand raised to cover her mouth. Taylor was crying, staring back at Connor.**

**"CONNOR, NO!" He screamed as he ran to his best friend's side, "Nonononono. Connor, WAKE UP!"**

**Jude shook Connor, and after a moment he jerked, returning to consciousness. He emitted a scream at the intense agony radiating from his foot.**

**"GAAAH! IT HURTS...!"**

**"Oh thank god, you're alive! CALL AN AMBULANCE! Stay awake Connor, talk to me."**

**"H-H-Hurts so b-badly Jude..."**

**"I know, I know. It's gonna be okay."**

**"I'm sorry." Connor whispered frantically as pain beginning to overcome all of his senses, "I'm so sorry, Jude. You gotta believe me."**

**"I know, Connor. I know." Jude assured, equally frantic.**

**"I'll make it right, Jude. I promise, I'll make it right." Connor whimpered frantically.**

**The sound of sirens could be heard in the distance.**

**"I'm gonna go flag them down." Jude said.**

**"NOO! NO, PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME ALONE!" Connor cried, starting to sob heavily, "Pleasepleaseplease..."**

**"I'll go flag them down." Taylor's dad said shakily, and ran from the house to meet the ambulance at the curb.**

**Jude sat down and pulled Connor's head into his lap, and Connor latched onto him, clinging to him desperately, begging him not to leave him.**

"CONNOR!"

Connor jolted back to reality with a small jump, to find Jude looking at him wearily.

"Are you okay?" Jude asked.

"Y-yeah. I'm fine. Just remembering." Connor answered.

Jude hesitated for only an instance before reaching out and rubbing Connor's back comfortingly. Connor gave him a thankful smile.

"Thanks for not leaving me that night." Connor said softly.

"Don't scare me like that again." Jude responded with a nod, "I've never been that scared in my life."

Their conversation was cut off by the opening of the door, and the entrance of Eric.

"Discharge papers are filed. Let's get the hell out of here." He said.

Connor immediately smiled, and slowly hobbled forth on his crutches. Jude and Eric stuck close Connor's sides, making he sure he didn't trip and fall as he clumsily maneuvered his way to the elevator.

"Where's mom?" Connor suddenly asked, "I figured she'd be here."

"She had to go back to L.A to start packing our stuff for the move back." Eric explained.

"Oh. Okay, that makes sense." Connor said, heaving a mental sigh of relief.

Connor was incredibly nervous about coming out to his mother, and in all honesty he wasn't prepared to do it. While he knew that his mother's reaction would be nothing like his father's and that Jude would be at his side when it happened, he was still terrified, and anything that delayed the inevitable and gave him more time to mentally prepare himself was a welcome distraction.

The trio stepped into the elevator, and Eric pressed the button for the lobby. The ride was short, with Connor shuddering from the feeling of butterflies that was customary from an elevator ride. The elevator door opened, and they stepped out, and Eric led the two through the hospital lobby towards the front door. When they stepped through the door into the heat and sun of San Diego, Connor stopped. He inhaled the smell of fresh air, and savored the feeling of the wind on his face.

"Wait here, I'm gonna go get the truck." Eric said, and jogged off towards the parking lot.

Jude and Connor stood there silently for the short wait, and when Eric pulled up in his Chevrolet Avalanche, Jude helped Connor into the front seat. Jude hopped in the back seat and buckled his seatbelt, storing Connor's crutches next to him. Eric slowly pulled away from the curb and turned onto the road. Connor stared out the window at the hospital as they drove away.

"Bye bye, Sacred Cross. Good riddance." He mumbled.

Jude hears him and chuckled softly, rolling his eyes at his boyfriend.

About an hour later, after getting stuck in traffic because some idiot jack-knifed and crashed into his own camper, they finally arrived at the Adams Foster house. Connor looked up at the house happily.

"We're home." He said.

Behind him, Jude smiled.

"Yeah." He muttered happily.

Jude opened the door, and grabbed Connor's crutches before sliding out and stepping up to Connor's door and opening it for him. Slowly, he helped Connor out of the car, and handed him his crutches.

"I'll see you guys later." Eric said, "I'm gonna go and start getting the house ready. It should be ready in a couple of days."

"Okay." Connor said, "Thanks bro. For everything."

"Hey, what are brothers for?" Eric asked.

The couple waved goodbye as Eric back out of the driveway and drove off down the road. They turned and headed toward the front door. Jude helped him up the steps, and held the front door open to allow him entrance to the house. Once inside, he was immediately set upon by Stef and Lena, who hugged him tightly. He didn't hesitate to hug them back.

"Good to see you out of the hospital, bud." Lena said.

"Good to be out. It was driving me crazy." Connor said, "Where is everybody?"

"Brandon's upstairs, working on his music." Stef said, "Callie is at Roberts, but she'll be back for lunch. Mariana is out with Mat, and Jesus is in the kitchen eating a snack."

"Oh, okay." Connor responded, "Actually, when is lunch? It'd be good to eat food that isn't from a hospital cafeteria."

"Well, lunch is in an hour, so you won't have to wait too long." Stef said, "I know how you feel, though. Sacred Cross has lousy food."

"What do you wanna do until then?" Connor asked, turning to Jude.

"Video games?" He asked, "I got Skyrim a couple of days before this mess happened. Haven't played it yet."

"You'll like it. I did." Connor said enthusiastically, "The controls are kind of like Fallout, but there's magic and stuff. If you level up your destruction skill to Master level, and have enough gold, you can buy a spell that lets you shoot a column of lighting out of your hands. There's another that causes a blizzard around you, and another that's basically a huge explosion. The character waves his hands around, and BOOM, fire everywhere, it's awesome."

Jude laughed at his enthusiasm. As he watched Connor wave his arms around while trying to lean on his crutches, Jude was just glad to see Connor happy again.

"You guys want a snack?" Lena asked.

"Sure." Connor said thankfully.

"Nah, I'm good." Jude said.

"I still can't believe you don't like snacks." Connor teased as the boys adjourned to the living room, Jude carrying a bag of chips for Connor.

"Hey, not pigging out on snacks is what keeps me skinny." Jude joked as the two sat down on the couch.

"You calling me fat?" Connor asked in mock offense.

"No." Jude deadpanned, "I wouldn't even joke about that. You're hot! Have you looked in the mirror, Mr. Six-Pack? You're built like an Adonis."

Connor blushed.

"You really think I'm hot?" Connor asked.

"Well... yeah. Of course I do." Jude said as if stating the most obvious thing in the world, "Why, did you doubt that?"

"Well, I know you like me." Connor said simply, "But we haven't really talked about this kind of thing yet. I didn't know what you thought of me... ya know, that way. Looks wise."

"You're hot, Connor. Trust me" Jude said, "A lot hotter than me."

"Why do you say that?" Connor asked confused.

"You have a lot more muscles than me. You're a lot hotter." Jude deadpanned.

"Just because you're not built like an athlete doesn't mean you're not hot." Connor deadpanned back, "Besides, I think you're good the way you are. You never have to feel inadequate with me. You're perfect the way you are."

"I still wish I had your muscles." Jude grumbled.

"Not that you need it, but if you want, you could start working out with me once my foot heals enough for me to start back up." Connor offered, "Jesus could probably help, too. It'll take some work, but if you want to gain some muscle tone, I can help."

Jude quirked the corner of his mouth into a small smile.

"Thanks Connor."

"No need to thank me, Jude." Connor said, waving it off, "It's just me speaking the truth."

The two fell into a comfortable silence as the game started. Jude designed his character to look somewhat like him, and set about causing as much mayhem as he could while still completing the missions. About forty minutes later, Jude was directing his character through a large underground cavern, looking for a word of power. He was trying to kill a bandit, but kept missing him with his bow and arrow. Connor jumped in and started trying to offer advice, which Jude studiously ignored.

"Come on, Jude! Use Unrelenting Force! BLOW HIM OFF THE CLIFF!" Connor instructed enthusiastically.

Jude did as Connor suggested, holding the shout button, and watching with glee as his character emitted a shockwave from his mouth that caused the bandit to be thrown through the air like a ragdoll, falling over the ledge of the cliff to plunge to his death below.

"See, if you'd listen to me more, you'd win faster." Connor teased.

"Oh hush up, muscle head." Jude teased back, poking Connor in the side.

What he didn't expect was for Connor to squeak and leap away from the touch. Jude looked at him in shock, before a sly grin stretched over his face.

"Connor Stevens, are you _ticklish_?" Jude cackled evilly.

"NO! No, you just caught me by surprise is all." Connor stammered through his laughter.

"I think you're lying." Jude said, laughter in his voice as he slid closer to Connor, hands poised and ready to lunge, "I think I've found one of your weaknesses."

"Please don't..." Connor begged, trying not to laugh.

"Oh, I'm not going to now, but believe me... when you least expect it." Jude said dramatically.

Connor laughed and leaned in and pecked Jude on the tip of his nose, making his face scrunch up as he started laughing too and turned red simultaneously.

"How long do you think it'll be before we get used to this?" Jude asked.

"I don't know." Connor said as Stef entered the room.

"Lunch is ready boys." She said.

"What are we having?" Jude asked.

"Tacos." She answered.

Jude helped Connor to his feet, and the pair followed Stef into the kitchen, where the rest of the family sat waiting. Neither Jude nor Connor had heard Callie arrive home, because they had been so absorbed in their game. The two sat next to each other, and not ten seconds later, Jude felt something rub against his ankle. He looked down to find Connor's foot rubbing against his. Jude smiled to himself, and engaged in a game of footsie with his boyfriend.

Jude got up after he fixed his first taco, and pulled a bottle of ketchup from the fridge. He squirted a small amount onto the taco, and took a bite. He failed to notice that the whole family was watching him do so with various expressions, ranging from confusion to disgust. Connor stared, accidentally spilling hot sauce on his fingers.

"Really?" Connor asked, his nose scrunched in disgust.

"What?" Jude asked.

"You put ketchup on your tacos?" Lena deadpanned.

"What? It's good!" He exclaimed in defense.

"Why do I seriously doubt that?" Connor said flatly.

"Try it. You might like it." Jude challenged sassily.

"Fine, I will." Connor said.

He was never one to back down from a challenge.

He took the bottle of ketchup from Jude and squirted a small amount onto a small portion of his soft taco. Connor proceeded to tear the ketchup polluted piece from the rest of the taco and popped it into his mouth. The strange combination assaulted his taste buds unpleasantly, and his face scrunched in disgust.

"Oh my god, that's disgusting."

Jude, being the mature thirteen year old boy that he was, responded as was customary for a boy of his age against such a response and offense against his taste in food.

He stuck his tongue out at him. Connor reached out and tapped Jude's tongue with the tip of his finger, which was still covered in hot sauce, causing Jude to sputter in disbelief that Connor had just done what he did.

"Really, Connor?" Jude said.

"Hey, you had it coming." Connor teased.

Once their antics were finished, the rest of the dinner was full of conversation ranging from Brandon's admission to Idyllwild, to Jesus's impending departure for boarding school in Colorado. After lunch wrapped up, Jude and Connor adjourned back to the living room and resumed their positions in front of the television and un-paused the game. The played for another hour in silence, with Connor eventually leaning his head on Jude's shoulder before Jude spoke up.

"Hey, can we talk about something?" Jude asked.

"Yeah, of course." Connor said.

"Have you thought about how you're gonna tell your mom?" Jude asked, "About us. About you."

"I have no idea." Connor answered, "I guess I'll pull her into the living room, and we'll tell her together? Sounds like the best plan."

"If that's what you wanna do, than yeah." Jude agreed, "How do you think she'll react."

"She won't react like my dad." Connor said bluntly, "I know that much. Other than that... I don't really know. I'm not gonna pretend I'm not a little scared, Jude."

"Hey. Even if her reaction isn't the best, you'll always have a safe place here." Jude said softly, "This place is as much your home as it is mine now. You're part of the family now."

"I know." Connor said, looking into Jude's eyes, "I got really lucky the day I met you, you know that?"

"Yeah, how far we've come, right?" Jude said, laughing softly.

The two looked at each other, and Jude reached out and inserted his hand into Connor's. Connor held Jude's hand gently in his own grasp, messaging the back of Jude's hand with his thumb.

They continued to play video games until it was time for them to prepare for bed. Connor insisted that he could traverse the treachery of the staircase by himself, only to moment's later request Jude's assistance. After taking turns using the bathroom to change into their pajamas, the boys crawled into Jude's bed.

Jude fell asleep first, leaving Connor lying there awake. Just before he fell asleep, Connor felt Jude shift next to him and snuggle into his side. When Connor did finally succumb to sleep, he did so happily with a smile on his face.

***********

The next day passed far too quickly for the boys, in a whirlwind of Star Wars movies, and more video games. As it was a Sunday, Jude was dreading his return to school the next day, and all too soon, Jude was waking up and dressing to return to Anchor Beach. Connor was still asleep when he left, but Jude made sure to tuck the blanket back around his sleeping boyfriend before making his exit.

The first few hours of the day pass quickly, which Jude was thankful for. Soon, he was arriving at lunch. He sat down at the table, which sat in the shade under a tree. It was the same table he had sat at while watching Connor and Daria making out while he stewed furiously with jealousy. He opened his paper sack and withdrew his sandwich and water. He ate quickly, before putting his headphones in and turning on some music. He quickly gave up trying to find something to listen to, since the iPod, a hand me down from Jesus, had nothing on it that interested him or that he could even remotely tolerate listen to. He paused it and stuffed it back into his pocket, making a mental note to see if Connor had any good music when he got home later that day.

A shadow crossed the table, and Jude looked up to see Daria and Taylor moving to sit with him.

"Hey, Jude." Taylor said.

 _'Don't make it bad.'_ Jude thought briefly, but shook his head, exasperated at himself.

"Hey Taylor, Daria." Jude said quietly.

"How's Connor?" Taylor asked.

Jude smiled slightly.

"He's okay. He's out of the hospital." Jude said relieved.

"We know. He texted me earlier and explained what happened with his dad." Taylor said, "Told me that he was gonna be staying with his mom and brother from now on."

"Yeah." Jude said.

"Are you okay?" Daria asked.

"Huh? Yeah, I'm fine." Jude answered easily.

"Bet you're glad Adam's out of the picture, huh?" Taylor asked, "No more of him trying to destroy you and Connor's friendship."

At the word friendship, she gave him a subtle wink that Daria didn't notice. Jude snorted a laugh at his friend, and nodded.

"Um. Yeah, that is a plus." Jude agreed.

Jude then noticed that Daria looked sad. He makes eye contact with her and offers her a small smile.

"You okay?" Jude asked.

"Yeah, just sad." Daria said, "Connor told you that he broke up with me, I'm guessing. He tells you everything."

"Um. Yeah, he mentioned that." Jude said, becoming suddenly uncomfortable.

"He wouldn't even tell me why, either." Daria continued, "I hope it wasn't something I did."

"It wasn't." Jude interjected quickly.

Daria looked at him weirdly.

"Did he tell you why?"

Jude had the very distinct look reminiscent of a deer stuck in headlights.

"Yeah, but I don't know if Connor would want me to say anything."

Daria deflated, and Jude felt immensely guilty.

"Hold on. Let me text him and ask him if it's okay." Jude said.

Daria nodded as Jude pulled his phone back out and opened a text conversation with Connor.

J: Hey.

C: Hey! How's school?

J: Sitting w/Daria and Taylor at lunch.

C: Oh. That's awkward.

J: Ya. Daria is really sad about u breaking up w/ her.

C: Ya, sorry about that.

J: Is it ok if I tell her y?

C: Go ahead. I guess she deserves 2 no.

J: K thanx. C u win I get home.

C: ttyl.

Jude looked up from his phone and stood from his seat.

"Come with me, I don't want this to be overheard." Jude said.

He led them into the school, and the trio commandeered a deserted classroom. Once Jude was sure the door was locked and secured, he turned to the girls and sighed nervously.

"Okay, so what I'm about to tell you might make you mad." Jude said to Daria, "Did Connor ever tell you that his dad tried to stop us from being friends?"

"He mentioned it once, but I didn't get why." Daria said.

"Well, one day I went with Connor to the batting cages with Adam." Jude continued, "Adam spent the whole time criticizing Connor, and just being mean. By the end of it, Connor was so sad he was about to cry. I tried to make him feel better, and I gave his a pat on the back. Adam saw me do that. The next day at school I ask Connor if he can stay over the next night to play a new game I'd gotten. Connor tells me that his dad has banned him from coming over to my house."

"That's fricken stupid. Why?" Daria asked.

"Apparently giving your emotionally abuse best friend a pat on the back means you're gay." Jude said.

Daria looked demented from the intensity of the glare set on her face.

"If I burnt down his house, will you give me an alibi?" She hissed.

Jude snorted.

"I appreciate the sentiment, but it won't be necessary."Jude said, "Anyway, you remember the school camping trip?"

"Yeah, we hung out with you guys while we were swimming." Daria said with a nod, "You and Connor kept trying to tackle each other in the water."

"Yeah, well. We shared a tent." Jude continued, "We were talking about things, when we broached the subject of a game of spin the bottle we'd been in a couple weeks earlier."

"What happened during the game?" Daria asked.

"Well, Connor snuck over to my house while a party was going on." Jude explained, "Chelsea and Maddie were there."

"Ugh, those two." Taylor grumbled.

"You don't like them?" Jude asked.

"Don't get her started, just keep going." Daria advised.

"Okay, never mind then." Jude said, looking slightly alarmed, "Anyway, during the game, Connor spun it and it landed on me."

"Oh." Daria said.

"Yeah. Awkward, right?" Jude said, "I wasn't gonna do it. Called the game stupid. Connor said it was fine, and to just get it over with. We were about an inch from kissing when my sister Callie came in saying that Adam was there looking for Connor."

"Okay, why were you talking about that in the tent?" Daria asked.

"I wondered the same thing." Jude said, "I asked him why he was asking... and his answer wasn't what I expected at all."

"What was his answer?" Daria asked.

"Um... he uh, he kissed me." Jude confessed, "And he's done it again since then."

Daria's eyes widened in realization.

"OH, I get it now." She said, "He broke up with me because he actually liked you."

"Yeah." Jude said sheepishly, "Sorry about that."

"So Connor is actually gay?" Daria asked for confirmation.

"Yeah.

"Then why did he ask me out in the first place?" She asked confused.

"The only way Adam would let us spend time together was if Connor had a girlfriend..." Jude said, "I'm sorry, Daria."

"Don't be. It's fine." She said waving it off, "With the way Adam was, I can't say I blame Connor for hiding that. Are you two a thing now? Or..."

"Yeah. We are." Jude confirmed, "We made it official when I got to see him at the hospital."

"It's about time." Taylor huffed.

"You already knew?" Daria asked surprised.

"Yeah, when she suggested getting drunk and making out that night she nudged me and pointed her eyes at Connor." Jude explained, "He was grinning at me like an idiot. She was trying to set us up."

Daria laughed.

"Well, it kind of worked, Connor's gunshot wound aside." Daria joked.

"So... you're not mad, then?" Jude asked Daria, "I expected to get slapped to be honest."

"Nah, it's all good. I'm just glad it wasn't something wrong with me." Daria shrugged, "I'm happy for him. He's accepted himself, and he's found somebody he can be happy with. And you, man, are lucky. You only snagged the hottest guy in the whole school as your first boyfriend."

Jude blushes furiously.

"Can you, uh... not say anything about this to anybody?" Jude asked, "I'm not ready for this to be public yet, and I have no idea what Connor wants to do. We haven't talked about it yet."

"Don't worry, our lips are sealed." Daria assured as the bell rang to signal the end of lunch period.

Jude stood there and watched as Daria and Taylor walked away, and he found himself considering how good his luck was to have them as friends.


	4. Chapter 4

The rest of the school day flew by at sonic speed, with a litany of boredom and the assigning of surprisingly little homework. Soon Jude was walking back through the front door of the house. He threw his backpack down on the couch and was surprised to find that Connor was not in the living room on the XBox. Jude furrowed his eyebrows in confusion, and trudged upstairs to his room. He opened the door to his bedroom to find Connor fast asleep. Jude smiled softly, before crawling into the bed next to Connor. He tried to be careful not to wake Connor, but his effort was in vain, because as soon as he laid down, Connor rolled over facing Jude's back and put an arm around him, pulling him close.

 _"Well... this is new."_ Jude thought happily to himself, _"This is... nice. Hard to believe that not even a week ago, he was making out with Daria, and now he's my boyfriend and he's cuddling up to me. I could get used to this."_

"Happy to see me?" Jude said teasingly.

"Yes." Connor grumbled sleepily, "Now hush. I wanna cuddle."

Jude hesitated, purely because this was something completely new to him and he and Connor had never done this before.

"Do you not want to?" Connor mumbled sadly.

"What? No, I do. Believe me, I do." Jude said, settling in to being the little spoon, "It's just... we haven't done this yet."

"You cuddled up with me last night after you fell asleep." Connor mumbled and settled his head into Jude's shoulder.

"Oh. I must have moved in my sleep, because we weren't when I woke up this morning." Jude said.

After cuddling for twenty minutes, Connor rolled over and got out of the bed and sat in Jude's beanbag chair, while Jude sat up in bed. Connor rubbed his foot against Jude's.

"So, how was school." Connor asked.

"Well, Daria doesn't hate us." Jude said quietly, "So that's a plus. Taylor's thrilled for us."

"Of course she is. It's Taylor." Connor said, sounding more awake, "I heard from my brother earlier."

"What'd he say?" Jude asked.

"The house is ready." Connor answered, "He'll be over to pick me up around four."

"Can I come see it with you?" Jude asked.

"Yeah, I want you to come. I'm gonna tell my mom tonight." Connor said nervously.

Jude stiffened.

"Are you sure?" Jude asked.

Connor responded with a simple nod.

"You nervous?" Jude asked gently.

"Terribly." Connor confirmed.

"It'll be okay." Jude comforted.

"I hope so." Connor said, "What do you want to do until it's time?"

"Let's just lay up here." Jude said, and Connor laughed and hobbled back to the bed and laid next to Jude. Jude smiled and kissed him on the forehead.

"I'm so happy right now." Connor whispered, "We're finally able to do this and not be afraid."

"Me too." Jude said, grinning widely.

The two laid there, and eventually they fell asleep. They were awoken by somebody shaking their shoulders. They opened their eyes with twin huffs of annoyance, only to be met by the sight of an extremely amused, camera wielding Lena. The two blushed and hopped up out of the bed. Connor stayed silent, turning red as he kept his eyes trained on his boot incased foot.

"Sorry mama." Jude mumbled.

"S'okay, bubba. You two weren't doing anything wrong." She responded, "I see you two have discovered cuddling?"

"Um. Yeah." Jude muttered shyly, blushing the whole time.

"You two are so cute. Anyway, I just wanted to tell Connor that his brother is here to get him." Lena said.

"Okay, is it okay if I go with him over to the new house?" Jude asked, "I wanna see the new house, and Connor wants me to be there when he tell his mom about us."

"Of course sweetie." She said, "Now come on boys, let's not leave Eric waiting too long."

The three traipsed down the stairs slowly, with Jude at Connor's side to stabilize him, and Lena in front carrying his crutches, ready to catch him in case he fell forward.

Eric sat at the kitchen table, tapping his foot. When he saw the two, he rose from his seat.

"You two ready to go?" He asked, recieving a nod, "All right, let's get going then."

*********

Twenty minutes later, they pulled up in front of a white one story house. It was modest and cozy, and Connor smiled at the house. He could tell already that he was going to like it here. He barely allowed the vehicle to roll to a stop before scrambling out. He hobbled to the front door on his crutches with Jude right behind him. Connor didn't even bother to knock, and entered the house, immediately coming face to face with his mother.

Christina Callaway, formerly Stevens, was a tall, thin middle aged woman with hair the same color as Connor's, albeit with a small amount of grey. She was a very attractive, tanned skinned woman, and she had the same kind chocolate brown eyes that her son did, behind which you could see cunning, and a considerable amount of intelligence. She had Connor's smile, as well.

"Hi, Mom." Connor said with a bright smile.

She rushed forward to greet Connor with a warm hug, lifting him from his feet and placing a kiss to the boy's cheek, which he returned.

"Welcome home, buddy." She told him.

She sat him down, allowing him to steady himself on his crutches before releasing him from the embrace and turning to Jude.

"It's good to see you again, Jude."

The last time Jude had seen her was the time he spent the night over at Connor's house when Stef got shot, and at the time the woman had seemed miserable. It was good to see her looking happy. Jude returned the warm smile that Christina was giving him, and stuck out his hand to shake hers. She looked at the hand with an eyebrow raised in amusement.

"Good to see you too, Ms. Callaway." Jude said politely.

"Oh, don't be silly dear." She responded, disregarding Jude's outstretched hand and pulling him into a hug that matched the one she had given Connor, "Call me Christina. Or CeCe if you're not comfortable with calling me by my first name."

"O-okay." Jude stammered, returning the hug.

Christina released him from the hug and met his gaze.

"I can't thank you enough for being there for Connor through this mess." Christina said sincerely, "It makes me feel better knowing that he's had such a good friend at his side to help him. Well done on standing up to Adam, by the way. I can't believe how ridiculous that man is being. It boggles the mind."

"He's always been this way." Connor interjected contemptuously, "How can you NOT believe it?"

"He wasn't always like this, baby." Christina said softly, "When he was younger, he was a lot like you. Actually, it's uncanny how like you he was. I only wish I knew why Adam was acting like this."

Connor just barely repressed a snort of disbelief, because as far back as he could remember his mere motion that Adam Stevens had once been a kind human being was a completely alien concept to him. Christina caught the look of disbelief on Connor's face.

"I know that's hard for you to believe, but it's true." She continued, "I've known him since we were kids. We were childhood friends. Before our junior year of high school, he was different. He was kind. Trustworthy. Compassionate. Didn't have a single prejudiced bone in his entire body."

Connor released a single skeptical bark of laughter following his mother's final sentence, cutting her off.

"Why do I find that hard to believe?" Connor deadpanned.

"It's true, baby. I know it is, because I saw it firsthand." Christina continued, "There was one boy in our year who was gay, his name was Ritchie. He confided in one of his closest friends that he was gay, and the friend blabbed it to the whole school. Outted him. People bullied him horrifically, until one day Adam had enough and stuck up for him. Adam basically told the whole school that Ritchie was under his protection. After that, Ritchie became his best friend. They were inseparable. Eventually, Ritchie developed a crush on Adam..."

"How did that turn out?" Connor asked, almost afraid to know the answer.

"I was there when Adam found out." Christina said, "Ritchie told him the truth, and started crying, begging for forgiveness. Adam just pulled him into a hug, and told him it would be all right. After that, if anything, Adam became even more protective of him."

"What happened then?" Connor asked, extremely confused.

"Well, his family was pretty much ruled by his grandparents." Christina explained, "And at the beginning of the summer after junior year, something happened, and it sparked a huge fight that resulted in Adam's grandparents forcing his parents to send him away somewhere. He came back just in time to start senior year, and he was different. He was colder, angrier, and he avoided Ritchie like the plague. People started bullying Ritchie again, and it was horrible, the things those people did. It caused him to try to commit suicide, and Adam barely batted an eyelash. Then Adam and I got together, and not even a full year later, Eric was born."

Connor and Jude looked extremely confused.

"I wonder what happened when he was sent away that summer..." Connor guessed, "I wonder what happened to change him like that."

"I remember him saying something about a place called the Lost Hills Camp." Christina said, "Or something like that."

"I'll look into it later, for now though I want Connor to check out his new room." Eric interjected, and led the pair down a hallway to an opened door.

Connor's eyes widened slightly as he walked into his new room. Jude realized that it looked exactly like his old room at his dad's house.

"How did you get all my stuff out of the house?" Connor asked.

"Went over and got it. Took Stef with me in uniform." Eric explained, "Found dad passed out on the couch, reeking of booze. He had his old high school yearbook from his junior year opened on the table next to the couch, and it looked like he'd been crying."

"Huh, so he got drunk. Not surprised about that." Connor muttered spitefully.

"Anyway, I'm gonna go boys." Eric said, "I'm gonna go look into this camp mom mentioned."

They nodded as Eric made his exit. Jude waited until he heard the front door shut with a click before breaking the silence.

"So... when are we gonna do it?" Jude asked, "Tell your mom, I mean?"

"In the net five minutes. If I don't get it out of the way immediately, I'm gonna chicken out." Connor mumbled nervously, "God... I am so scared, Jude."

"You have nothing to be scared of, Connor." Jude assured soothingly, "Everything's gonna be fine."

"How can you be so sure?" Connor croaked, beginning to get upset.

"Calm down, Connor." Jude said, wrapping Connor in a tentative hug, which Connor returned with crushing force, "I know you're nervous. I would be nervous too. But your mom is not your dad. She's not gonna react like he did. I promise."

Connor looked into Jude's eyes, as if searching for the truth in them. Without warning, Connor leaned forward and placed a kiss on Jude's lips. It was lightning fast, and was over almost as soon as it began, and it gave both boys an extreme case of the butterflies.

"I don't know what I'd do without you sometimes, Jude." Connor breathed.

"Probably lose your mind." Jude deadpanned, still blushing from the kiss.

"Yeah, that's true." Connor said.

He turned and stared out into the hallway. He cracked his neck, then his knuckles. He stood up straight, and squared his shoulders. He held his hand out to Jude, who took it immediately.

"Here goes nothing." Connor said, his voice cracking halfway through.

Connor led Jude out of the room and down the hallway to the kitchen. Christina was standing at the counter, staring out the window with a glass of water in her hand and a couple of pills in the other. They watched as she took the pills. Jude looked at Connor questioningly.

"She get's migraines, remember?" Connor answered, "She has medicine for it."

"Oh yeah, I remember you mentioning that once." Jude whispered back.

Connor turned back towards his mom, and breathed a shaky breath.

"Um. Mom?" Connor stammered.

"Yeah honey?" Christina asked, and immediately looked worried once looking at Connor, "What is it? You look like you're gonna throw up."

"Um, can I talk to you in the living room for a minute?" Connor asked quietly, "There's something we need to talk about."

She nodded, placing her glass of water on the counter and following the pair into the living room. Jude and Connor took a seat next to each other on the couch, while Christina simply sat on the wooden coffee table directly in front of Connor.

"Okay, now what is it, Connor?" She asked, clearly worried, "I've never seen you look so scared. Is something wrong?"

"I need you to promise me you aren't going to hate me, momma." Connor whimpered.

Christina recoiled as if she'd been slapped.

"Why?" She asked, astonished, "Why would I hate you? I could NEVER hate you, baby!"

"P-please just say it. Promise me." Connor cried softly.

"I promise Connor. I love you, baby." Christina said soothingly, putting her hand on Connor's knee, "I could never hate you if I tried."

"Dad did." Connor whimpered sadly.

Christina looked supremely confused, and very confused.

"Connor, what's going on?"

"Mom, I... I-I'm g-g... I'm g-g... oh god I can't say it." Connor cried, barely stopping himself from hyperventilating.

Jude reaches over and rubs Connor's back comfortingly.

"It's okay, Connor." Jude whispers to him.

Connor looks up and makes eye contact with Jude, and nodded slowly, wiping the tears away.

"I... *sniff*... I'm g-g-gay, mom." Connor stammered.

That was all it took, and the floodgates finally opened. Connor started trembling, and his shakes turned to body wracking sobs. Christina's eyes opened wide at her son's confession, and as soon as Connor started crying, she gently reached out and took her son into her arms and held him.

"I-I'm sorry, m-momma." Connor cried, "I'm sorry!"

"Never be sorry for who you are." She said softly, placing a kiss to the top of Connor's head.

She pulled out of the embrace and looked into Connor's eyes, using her thumbs to gently wipe away the tears.

"I can't say that I'm not shocked." Christina admitted, "I had no idea. But you are my child. I love you, more than words can express. I will always love you. Nothing can change that. You being gay doesn't change the fact that you are my son, and you are a good boy. I'm proud of you."

"Y-y-you mean, you r-really don't c-care?" Connor cried softly.

"No, baby. I don't care." She assured, "You're perfect just the way you are."

Connor launched forward and hugged her tightly, crying softly into her shoulder. After ten minutes, he pulled back and turned to Jude. He reached out and pulled him into a hug too.

"I told you it'd be alright." Jude whispered.

Connor squeezed him tightly before releasing him, and his body was flooded with relief and happiness.

"There's one more thing I've gotta tell you momma." Connor said, wiping his eyes once more.

"What is it?" She asked curiously.

Connor reached out and gently took Jude's hand into his.

"Mom... Jude's the only real reason I've gotten through all this." Connor said, "He's what made me accept myself. He's what made my go against dad. He'... he's my boyfriend."

The silence only lasted a few moments, during which Christina sat, her eyes wide with surprise. The silence ended when Christina smiled widely and wrapped both boys in a hug with a small squeal.

"Oh my GOD, you two make such a cute couple." She screeched happily, before releasing them and surveying Jude and turning back to Connor, "You, my son, have excellent taste. You couldn't have picked somebody cuter if you'd tried."

Connor began to laugh, while Jude blushed twenty shades of red and hid his head in Connor's shoulder.

"I know, I got lucky didn't I?" Connor said, sincerity seeping into every word.

Christina leaned forward and pulled Jude into a hug.

"I know I said it before," She said, "But thank you for being there for Connor. Welcome to the family, Jude."

Jude returned the hug.

"What are you two gonna do about it at school?" She asked, "Are you gonna be open about it, or what?"

"How open do you want to be?" Jude asked Connor.

"Well, without my dad to worry about I don't really care who knows." Connor said.

Jude pondered it for a second. He suddenly had an image of himself and Connor getting bullied and beaten up because of their relationship, and the image frightened him. It was something he never wanted to happen.

"I don't know if we should."

Connor's facial expression dropped.

"W-why not?" He asked.

"I don't want to get hurt." Jude said softly, "I don't want either of us to get beat up because we're the one gay couple in the school. I don't want you to get made fun of because you're dating the weird adopted kid who wears nail polish."

"Okay, first off, have you seen my muscles?" Connor deadpanned while flexing for emphasis, "I'd like to be able to see anybody in our grade take me down. And I'm pretty well liked at school, so I doubt anybody would try anything against us. And second, you're not weird. You're unique. I like unique. And you forgot some things in your description: Kind, funny, adorable, compassionate, and sassy just to name a few."

"It's still being labeled." Jude said, "Being put in a box by others, just to make you seem abnormal and not right. I've had enough of being labeled in my life, Connor. I've always had one. For as long as I can remember. It's always something. The new kid. Foster kid. Kid with dead mom and dad in prison. I hate it."

"You shouldn't let that stop you from being yourself." Christina interjected, "You should be yourself, and to hell with what others think. Wear your labels with pride. Take them, and use the power that they give. Your labels don't define you, so you shouldn't let them get in the way of being happy."

"I don't want to hide who I am, Jude." Connor said, "But if you're not ready to be out at school, we'll figure something out."

Jude looked at Connor, examining him. He took note of his slumped shoulders, and his altogether dejected posture. He sighed and decided that he was going to try a compromise.

"How about this?" Jude asked, "If we're asked, we won't lie. If somebody straight up asks us if we're together, we'll admit it. No lying. But I want to be discreet. No grand public displays of affection like you did with Daria."

"Can we hold hands, at least?" Connor asked hopefully.

Jude almost laughed at the way Connor seemed to resemble an overexcited puppy at that moment.

"Well, it might be difficult to hold hands with your crutches, but I guess hand holding is okay." Jude said, smiling softly at him.

Connor pumped his arms in exaggerated triumph, causing Jude's composure to finally crack and he let out a snort of laughter.

The three sat there for a few hours, during which Jude and Connor regaled Christina with the full tale of their evolution from friendship to romance. They had just finished talking when Eric finally returned, entering the living room with a peculiar look in his eyes. Eric took note of how close Jude and Connor were sitting.

"So you two told her then?" He asked, smiling slightly.

"Yeah, they did. Now all we have to do is find YOU somebody." Christina shot teasingly at Eric.

Eric snorted and glared at his mother.

"I already did find somebody." Eric said crossly, "And I lost her."

"ANYWAY, where did you go, bro?" Connor interjected quickly, hoping to prevent an argument. It worked, because Eric moved to sit down in the recliner in the corner of the room.

"I did a bit of digging..." Eric started.

"It's only been a couple of hours." Connor interjected.

"That's all it took." Eric said, and everybody noticed that he looked very pale as he spoke, "You all might want to sit down for this."

"I called grandma and grandpa, and asked them about it." Eric continued, "They sent me an email with some information in it. Lost Hills Camp for Boys was a camp in northern California that was shut down in 2013. It was a camp that focused on reparative therapy. They were shut down, and the land the camp sat on was seized by the state."

"What's reparative therapy?" Connor wondered aloud.

"A reprehensible practice that is now illegal in California, thank god for that. Otherwise you would have been majorly screwed." Eric said, his lip curling in disgust the further he spoke.

"What do you mean?" Connor asked.

"Connor... restorative therapy is conversion therapy." Eric said softly, "It's what Dad meant when he said he was going to send you somewhere out of state to be 'fixed'. It's supposed to turn gay people straight."

"Oh. But why would dad be sent to a..." Connor started to say but froze, his eyes widening to the size of saucers, "Oh, you have got to be fricken kidding me."

"Yeah." Eric said, "Now you're getting it."

"There has to be a mistake." Connor immediately snapped.

"I thought so too, but then I looked up the place's records." Eric said, and withdrew a piece of paper from his pocket which he unfolded and handed to Connor, "This is a list of 'patient' from the summer after dad's junior year."

Connor and Jude huddled together, and their eyes scrolled the list. Sure enough, near the bottom, printed defiantly in bold, was the name Adam Alexander Stevens.

"That... that can't be possible." Connor muttered, his grip on the paper slackening until it drifted lightly to the floor, "It... it can't be. It CAN'T BE!"

"It can't be, but it is. And it explains so much." Eric continued softly, "Do you know what those places do?"

Connor, Jude, and Christina all shook their heads in the negative.

"They basically torture you." Eric said bluntly, "They basically trick your brain into associating being gay with everything evil and painful, and force people into a life of confusion, sexual and emotion repression, self loathing and hatred. I've researched these places before. Exorcisms. That would partially explain why dad won't set foot in a church. Electroconvulsive therapy. Might explain why he would have massive panic attacks whenever he got an electric shock by something. Whippings. That would explain why anything that sounds like a whip cracking makes him terrified. You have to admit it fits, and grandma and grandpa confirmed it, even though they wouldn't give me much detail."

They all sat there, disbelief clearly etched on their faces.

"Yeah, it turns out Dad is a lot more like you than you think, Connor." Eric continued, "In more ways than we could have ever believed."

Connor sat there, trying to make sense of what had just been revealed.

"Is there any way to find out more?" He asked.

"I was gonna track down Ritchie and see if he's up to answering some questions."

"Do that." Connor said, "If what we suspect is true, then that means that Dad's like me. And as little as it may seem he deserves it, he might need our help."

Eric nodded in agreement.

"Well, let the hunt begin."


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The confrontation with Adam.

It took another four days before Eric returned, and he was accompanied by Stef, and a stranger. The stranger was tall, and he had short cropped red hair. He had a thin scar that cut right across the middle of his face. He had blue eyes that were piercing and calculating, but hidden in the depths you could see warmth. He was dressed impeccably, albeit casually.

"I've talked to mom about this, and we both agree that we need to get to the very bottom of this." Eric said, "And the only way to do that... is to talk to Dad about it."

"Do we have to?" Connor asked immediately.

"Connor, this is important." Eric argued, "We need to know."

Connor sighed, running his hand through his hair.

"Fine, when are we doing it."

"Right now, get changed." Eric deadpanned.

"You're kidding me, right?" Connor returned in the same manner.

"No, not even a little bit, little brother." Eric said, "Hop to it."

"I'm not a fricken bunny." Connor grumbled.

"No, you're right." Jude interjected teasingly, "You're more of an overexcited puppy."

Connor continued to grumble as he hobbled back to his room to get changed, leaving a highly amused Jude standing with a hysterically laughing Eric and the rest of the group. Connor, irritated by the animal comments, decided to not speak to Jude because of the teasing. Connor was able to give Jude the cold shoulder for all of five seconds, when Jude pouted and asked for a kiss. He caved immediately, and in the background both boys vaguely heard Eric imitating the cracking of a whip. Connor stuck his tongue out at his older brother, and opened his mouth to begin a bickering match, but Jude put a stop to it by placing his mouth over Connor's and kissing him. Needless to say, Connor did not complain about Jude's method for preventing an argument. In fact, he decided that he needed to make Jude employ that particular method more often.

"Ugh. Stop sucking face and come on." Eric deadpanned.

He was answered with the full force of Jude's infamous side eyed glare, which Connor had long ago learned to avoid at all costs. Eric put his hand up in surrender.

"Sorry."

"Grrr, got your sass on today, do we Judicorn?" Connor teased, not realising his mistake.

Jude stiffened and pulled away from Connor.

"Who. Told. You. That. Nickname?" Jude hissed angrily.

Connor, realizing his misstep, took a few steps back on his crutches.

"Um. Mariana." Connor said sheepishly.

"I'm gonna kill her." Jude growled.

"Sorry," Connor said quickly, "I just thought it was cute."

Jude looked at Connor strangely.

"You do?" Jude asked.

"Well... yeah." Connor said, "It fits you. Cute, but with a sharp horn."

Eric snorted and collapsed into the wall, laughing uproariously. Connor looked confused, and Jude stared at him in horror.

"Think about what the hell you just said." Jude deadpanned.

Connor almost immediately looked horrified.

"THAT'S NOT WHAT I MEANT!" Connor exclaimed, "I meant his temper! Not THAT!"

Eric fought to compose himself.

"S-sorry." Eric sputtered through his laughter, "That was just too good. Now come on, we gotta go."

Connor hobbled out of the door with Jude right on his heels, both boys both blushing an extraordinary red. They hopped into Eric's Avalanche and he pulled out onto the road, with Stef following in her cop car, and the stranger bringing up the rear in his own black car, which caught both boys by surprise when they noticed what it was.

"Holy shit, am I hallucinating or is that really what I think it is?" Jude asked, his eyes wide with shock and envy.

"What?" Eric asked, confused.

"That's a fricken Lamborghini Aventador!" Connor exclaimed.

"Oh. Yes it is." Eric said nonchalantly, "He owns a construction company. He's got a Ferrari too, I think."

"I never did ask you... Who is he?" Connor asked, gesturing out the back window.

"He's the cavalry." Eric answered cryptically.

"Why can't you give me a straight answer?" Connor asked irritably.

"Trust me, you'll find out who he is soon enough." Eric said as they continued down the street.

Connor grumbled at his Uncle, and Jude poked him in the side right where Connor was ticklish. Connor leapt in his seat with a rather girly squeal. Jude merely smirked at him.

"Connor?"

"What?" Connor muttered crossly.

"You're grumbling too much." Jude said, "You should be punished."

The color drained from Connor's face.

"You wouldn't."

"Oh, but wouldn't I?"

Jude reached over and began tickling him mercilessly, immediately sending him into a loud fit of hysterical giggles.

"GAAH! N-NO! J-JUDE, S-STOP! PLEASE? GAHAHAHAHA!" Connor screeched through his laughter.

"STOP GRUMBLING THEN, YOU DORK!" Jude shouted through his own laughter.

"OKAY OKAY!" Connor cried through his laughter as Jude continued to assault his weakness, "I'LL STOP! NOW PLEASE!"

"BEG FOR MERCY!" Jude said, laughing almost as hard as Connor.

"MERCY, PLEASE! MERCY!"

Jude ceased his assault, and Connor took a moment to compose himself.

"I will find your weakness." Connor deadpanned, "One of these days."

"Good luck with that." Jude said, smirking evilly.

"You're evil." Connor said petulantly.

"Yet you've gone to so much trouble to date me anyway."

Connor stared at him through narrowed eyes.

"This is true. Touché." Connor admitted, before turning away and beginning to pout.

Jude tapped him on the shoulder. Connor looked at him, and was caught by another of Jude's second great skill.

" _Oh god, not The Eyes. Not the puppy dog eyes!_ " Connor thought frantically.

"Kiss?" Jude asked innocently.

" _Dammit._ " Connor thought to himself.

"Please?" Jude asked, his brown eyes wide and sparkling.

"Gah, fine." Connor said, and leaned in and pecked Jude on the lips.

Not long after that, they arrived at Adam's house and pulled into the driveway. The stranger exited his Lamborghini with practiced ease while both boys drooled over the car. Eric rolled his eyes and tapped them both on the shoulder, motioning towards the house with his eyes. Jude nodded and they both followed them to the front door. The front door was unlocked, and the party entered the house cautiously, not knowing exactly what they'd find within. Connor started shaking, which Jude took notice of this immediately and put his hand on Connor's back to comfort him.

"You okay?" Jude asked him in concern.

"Scared." Connor admitted.

Jude took Connor's hand.

"You're safe. He can't hurt you." Jude assured him, "Mom will arrest him if he tries... if she doesn't just shoot him first."

Connor winced when he heard the word 'shoot', but he nodded in agreement with what Jude was saying.

Connor saw Eric shoot the stranger a look, but didn't catch the meaning behind it.

"Wait here, okay?" Eric said to the stranger, "You'll know when to come in."

The stranger nodded.

They ventured further into the house, and it only took them a minute to find Adam. Adam was sitting at the kitchen table, his head in his hands, and unopened beer sitting just out of his reach. Connor steeled himself as he approached his father. Adam noticed the movement and looked up, taking in the crowd that had entered his house. Instead of shouting like Connor expected, Adam shook his head and sighed resignedly.

"What the hell do you want?" Adam muttered.

It was not at all what Connor had expected. Connor had expected shouting, and an attempt at bodily harm. What he got was not even close. The person he was seeing now was not the same blustering, homophobic man that he had faced down in the hospital. Behind the false bravado was a man who was broken, and sad.

"We need to talk." Connor said.

"Well, I have nothing to say to you." Adam said miserably.

"Well, too bad. You're not being given a choice." Connor shot back.

"Why don't you just leave me alone?" Adam asked miserably, "You've escaped. You've got your little boyfriend. You've gotten away from me, so stay that way."

"Believe me, I would have, until I found out the real reason why you're like this." Connor said cautiously.

"You don't know a damned thing." Adam growled.

"Oh, I don't do I? Do the names Ritchie, or Lost Hills ring a bell?" Connor said, getting straight to the point.

Adam froze in his tracks, and the only other sound in the room was his sharp intake of breath.

"I think I understand very well, why you're like this dad." Connor said softly.

Adam moved as if to move toward Connor, but Stef stepped forward, her hand on her gun. Adam put his hands up in a motion of surrender.

"Don't even think about it, Adam." She growled.

"I wasn't gonna touch him." Adam said, his voice softer than many of them had ever heard it.

"Why should I believe that?" She asked him, "You've done it before."

"I know what I've done!" Adam snapped.

Everybody looked at him wearily as the man fell apart before their eyes.

"You want to talk to me? FINE! I'll fucking talk." Adam spat, "I'm well aware of what I've done."

"I'm well aware that I'm a fucking monster!" Adam ranted, tears filling his eyes, "The bastards at Lost Hill drilled that into my head well enough! I'm well aware that I've become one of the evil bastards that ruined one of the best things that ever happened to me! I'm well aware that I became the same abusive, controlling asshole that my grandfather was! I'm well aware that I've destroyed any chance at having a happy relationship with my son! I'm well aware that I almost did the exact same thing that those BASTARDS AT LOST HILLS DID TO ME!!"

The first tear found its way down Adam's face. Connor looked at his dad in disbelief. He had expected him to deny everything and throw a tantrum. Instead, he admitted to everything he had ever done, and he was crying about it. It seemed to Connor as if he'd stepped out of reality and into an episode of the Twilight Zone.

"A-and believe me... I f-f-feel absolutely t-terrible about it." Adam stammered sadly, and turned to talk directly to Connor, "I'm glad they got you away from me when they did, Connor, before you ended up doing what R-Ritchie did. I could never forgive myself if you tried to k-k-kill yourself because of me."

Connor shot Jude a look, before moving forward slowly to sit beside his father.

"Tell me what happened, dad." Connor begged, "Talk to me! It might help you."

"I don't deserve the help." Adam croaked.

"Yes you do!" Connor exclaimed, "Now please talk to me!"

"I have never talked about this stuff to anybody before, Connor." Adam said, trying desperately to hold back the torrent of tears threatening to burst forth, "It's too painful."

"Just try, please?" Connor pleaded.

Adam looked his son in the eyes, and sighed. Adam cracked his neck, and steeled himself to talk about something he had long ago hoped to forget.

"My grandparents ruled the family back then." Adam said shakily, "They saw the way I was around Ritchie, and they demanded that my parents send me to that camp."

"Why did they do it?" Connor asked softly.

"Because my parents were the most spineless doormats to walk the face of the Earth," Adam spat, "They folded like a collapsing house of cards. Handed me straight to a bunch of counselors and quack doctors. The things they did to me in that place... I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemies. Exorcisms, forcing you to pray for deliverance for hours and giving you whippings when you refused, giving you drugs that screw with your mind, sticking needles into the tips of your fingers and shocking you while showing you explicit images and having the gall to call it electroconvulsive therapy..."

Adam shuddered, and a tear escaped his eye and travelled south.

"After I came home from that fucking camp, I was broken." Adam ranted, "And I ruined the best thing that ever happened to me. I ruined my friendship with Ritchie. I stood by and allowed the school population to torture him, and he tried to kill himself, and I did nothing to help him. Later, I ruined my marriage, then my recovering relationship with my parents, and now I've ruined my relationship with my kids too. I'm a complete fucking failure."

"A complete failure wouldn't show remorse for the things he's done." A voice said, "You blame yourself too much."

Adam froze, and Connor realized that the person speaking was the stranger. He was confused as to why the stranger was speaking at all. Then he noticed the way his dad reacted to the stranger's voice, and his confusion grew. Who was this that could cause such a reaction from Adam?

"You shouldn't be blaming yourself." The stranger said, "You should be blaming them, Adam."

Adam started shaking, and turned slowly to face the stranger.

Adam's eyes widened as they fell on him, and as the two made eye contact, Adam had to grip the chair next to him to stay standing. It looked to Connor that Adam's eyes were almost literally bulging out of his head. Adam shook his head once, as if to clear a hallucination. When the stranger failed to disappear, however, he collapsed against the wall.

"R-Ritchie?" Adam whimpered.

Connor's eyes widened as his eyes fell upon the stranger, realization shooting through him. This man, this stranger, was Ritchie, Adam's old friend. It was at this moment that it suddenly struck Connor how truly broken Adam really was, just by the sheer vulnerability and fear in his voice as he addressed Ritchie. I spike of fury and anger, sadness and sympathy surged through Connor at the sight before him.

"Yeah, it's me." Ritchie said softly, "And I'm telling you, what happened to me, what I did to myself? It wasn't your fault."

"The hell it wasn't..." Adam muttered, turning back away from them, "If I had been there for you..."

"It's okay, Adam..."

That was all it took, and Adam finally snapped.

"NO! IT'S NOT OKAY!" Adam screamed at the top of his lungs whirling back around to face the crowd of people.

Adam's walls, the mask that he had hidden behind for so long, finally collapsed. Ritchie stepped forward to try and calm him down.

"Adam, calm down. It's..."

But he never got to finish his sentence because Adam continued to shout.

"YOU WERE MY BOYFRIEND, RITCHIE! I LOVED YOU! AND I ABANDONED YOU!"

Connor's heart dropped into the pit of his stomach, just as his jaw dropped, and just as the tears did.

That was it. His dad had said it, and at that moment, Adam looked more broken than he had ever looked before.

"I left you, ABANDONED YOU! Left you to deal with those FUCKERS all by yourself." Adam ranted distraughtly, "LEFT YOU TO THE FUCKING WOLVES, SOMETHING I PROMISED YOU I WOULD NEVER DO! AND IT ALMOST K-K-KILLED YOU! HOW CAN YOU SAY IT WAS ALRIGHT? ONLY THE LOWEST OF COWARDS ABANDON THE PEOPLE THEY LOVE!"

"YOU DIDN'T HAVE A CHOICE!" Ritchie shouted back pleadingly, "Those bastards at Lost Hills practically tortured you! THEY TWISTED YOU! FUCKED WITH YOUR MIND! THEY TURNED MY KIND, CARING BOYFRIEND INTO A SHADOW OF WHAT HE WAS! THAT IS NOT YOUR FAULT! EVERYTHING THAT'S HAPPENED IS THEIR FAULT, DO YOU HERE ME? THEIRS! NOT YOURS!"

Adam just stood there, sobbing as Ritchie shouted.

"Listen to me when I say that I have NEVER blamed you, Adam!" Ritchie continued, "EVER! I blamed them! Lost Hills, and your blasted grandfather! And I got revenge when they closed Lost Hills down! My construction company was hired for the redevelopment of the land it sat on. I LEVELLED THE PLACE! There was nothing left of it but dust and bad memories when I was done with it. It's a boy scout camp now."

"It's g-gone?" Adam asked, failing to suppress a stutter as he spoke.

"Yes, Adam! It's gone!" Ritchie said, smiling at Adam softly, "You're free now, Adam! Let us help you!"

"I don't deserve help after everything that I've done." Adam said dejectedly, "Calling my youngest son every homophobic slur in the book. Trying to ruin his relationship with a boy who fits him better than any girl ever could, all because of my own fucked up past. Telling my oldest I hope he rots in hell..."

"It's not you speaking, Adam." Jude said, "It's not the real you, I can tell. I've seen enough emotion from you, enough remorse in the last five minutes to know that. You need help, Adam. All of us are willing to do it."

Adam looked at Jude, an awestruck look on his face that shocked Jude.

"Why are you looking at me like that?" Jude asked.

"After everything I've put you through," Adam said quietly, "Everything that I've done to try to destroy your relationship with Connor, and you can actually forgive that and offer me help?"

Jude nodded, and Adam moved forward quickly, doing something that nobody ever thought they would see him do.

He gave Jude a hug.

"Thank you." Adam said.

Adam's words pulled Jude from his shock, and he returned the hug.

"You're welcome." Jude said, "You're not alone, Mr. Stevens."

"If you ever need to talk, Lena and I are just a phone call away." Stef said, "We'll help you every step of the way."

"I'll help you too," Ritchie said, and scoffed at the look of disbelief that Adam gave him, "I lost you all those years ago, and I've found you again. I'm not letting go. I know that things between us may never be what they were, but I'm willing to help."

"I'm not ready for that." Adam agreed, "I've got to deal with these issues first. At the end of the road, if you still want to try..."

"Of course, Adam." Ritchie said softly, holding out his hand to Adam.

Adam looked at the hand, and raised a trembling one of his own and gripped it. Ritchie pulled Adam into a hug, and that was all it took for Adam to break down again.

"I'm not gonna leave you. I'm not gonna let go, I promise." Ritchie said soothingly, "I'll be with you every step of the way."

Connor reached out and took Jude's hand, and the two made eye contact.

With not a single word spoken verbally between the two, they made each other the same promise.


	6. Chapter 6

It was two weeks after the confrontation at Adam's house, and Ritchie had hardly left Adam's side the entire time. Christina was hesitant to leave either of them alone with the other, because she harbored a lingering fear that Adam would go into another meltdown, and it would end in a massive fight. She resolved to allow the two some alone time to talk, and would check in on them later in the day and the next.

Adam had started going to therapy three times a week to help with his issues. The first thing he did, as instructed by his therapist, was write an apology for Connor and Eric as well as apologize in person. He had also confronted his parents about sending him to that accursed camp in the first place, which evolved into Ritchie having to stop Adam from lunging at his parents once he started shouting.

When Connor heard about that, any of the former respect he once held for his grandparents promptly disappeared. To allow their son to endure that kind of pain to the point that it led to the current mess was reprehensible at best, atrocious at worst. He was happy that his dad was getting the help he needed. Despite that, however, he couldn't bring himself to trust him again. Not yet anyway. He knew it wasn't fully his dad's fault, but after the months of verbal abuse and trying to ban him from seeing Jude, Connor just couldn't bring himself to fully forgive and forget. At Jude's urging, the both of them were trying.

Connor was settling into life with his mother and brother quickly.

He was also finally allowed to return to Anchor Beach. The night before, the two boys had another talk about how open about their relationship they were gonna be.

The two had caught a ride with Lena that morning, and Connor was bouncing in his seat with his hand holding firmly onto Jude's.

"Okay, so both of your teachers are gonna let you go from your classes a bit early so Connor can get to class on time." Lena explained to the boys, "This way, Connor isn't late to class and he has help in getting there."

Both boys nodded, and the car slowed to a stop in front of the school. Jude hopped out and walked around the car to help Connor out of the car. They still had forty five minutes until class started, and the two planned to spend it together.

"See you later, momma." Jude said to Lena, who blew him a kiss and drove off to park the car.

"You ready?" Connor asked, and Jude turned to Connor and looked him up and down.

Connor was wearing shorts and a grey and red shirt, a vast departure from his old flannel and jean combo that he'd wore for so long. When Jude had asked Connor about the change of style, Connor had smiled at him.

"Now that I don't have to worry about dad, I can wear whatever I want." Connor said happily.

Jude couldn't help but smile at his boyfriend as they started to walk towards the school together. Connor was glad the he'd finally mastered using the crutches, but was annoyed that he had to wear a thick padded boot around his injured foot.

They were shaken from their thoughts by a shout.

"JUDE! CONNOR!"

The boys turned to be greeted by Taylor and Daria, who were hurrying towards them with smiles on their faces. The two girls approached the duo, and Daria gently wrapped Connor in a soft hug. He stiffened momentarily as if expecting a slap, but relaxed a moment later.

"Welcome back." Daria whispered in his ear.

"Thanks." Connor said, giving her a squeeze before she pulled out of the hug.

Connor turned to Jude and Taylor.

"Can I talk to Daria alone for a second?" He asked.

"Sure, we'll go get breakfast." Jude said, and the two walked off to leave Connor and Daria standing their alone.

"What did you wanna talk about?" Daria asked.

"I wanted to apologize." Connor said meekly, "For everything. For leading you on, for practically cheating on you with Jude…"

"It's fine, man." She says softly, "I was just relieved that the break up wasn't because something was wrong with me. Besides, the way Jude told it, you two had been more than friends since the camping trip, something about you kissing him in your tent?"

Connor nodded, barely blushing.

"Personally, to me it sounded more like you were cheating on him with me instead of the other way around." Daria said.

Connor winced.

"I guess, yeah." He said sadly.

"I don't blame you for anything, Con." Daria said, "I'm proud of you."

"Why?" Connor asked in confusion, "If anybody, besides Jude, had a right to hate my guts it'd be you."

"Because, you're finally being true to yourself." She continued, "And that's the best thing you could've done. Plus you've snagged one of the cutest guys at school as your first boyfriend."

Connor snorted, and smiled widely.

"Yeah, I don't know how I managed that."

"You're you." She said.

Connor smiled at her.

"Thanks Daria." He said, "Friends?"

He extended a hand for her to shake, which she accepted immediately.

"Of course." She said, "You didn't think you could get rid f me that easily, did you?"

Connor laughed, and they were soon rejoined by Taylor and Jude. When the bell rang, the boys said goodbye and headed off towards Connor's first class.

The day was relatively easy, and when lunch finally arrived the two sat at a table outside to eat their lunch. The two had only been sitting down for a minute when a trio of boys approached their table. Jude recognized them immediately as some members of Connor's baseball team. A tall red headed boy, who Jude knew was named Evan Callahan, a brunette boy named Michael Bentley, who everybody called Mikey, and a boy wearing a snapback cap named Jimmy Hammond.

These three were the members of the team that Connor had always been closest to. Jude had once jokingly referred to them as Connor's minions, since they looked to Connor as their leader. Evan got a kick out of that, and had made a point of bowing to Connor as a joke for a week after that.

Connor smiled lightly at them.

"Welcome back, dude. Good to have our leader back." Evan said, taking the seat next to Jude and nodding at him, "Sup Foster?"

"Callahan." Jude returned with a nod and smirk of his own.

It was almost a game between the two of them. On the occasions that Jude has spoken with Evan, they always referred to each other solely by their last names

The boys all took turns greeting each other, and Jude was relieved that they all treated him with respect instead of the indifference he was used to with relatively popular students.

"So, did you really get shot?" Mikey asked.

"What do you think the boot and crutches are for?" Connor deadpanned, "Latest fashion trend?"

Evan snorted.

"Sorry, it's just kind of hard to believe, ya know?" Mikey asked sheepishly.

"Yeah, you scared the crap out of us dude." Evan said, "You, Daria, Taylor and Foster weren't at school, and the three of us got called down to the office and told you'd got shot. Scared the crap out of us. We tried to go see you, but your dad wasn't letting any visitors in."

Connor's eyes darkened, and Jude and Evan both noticed it. Evan looked at Jude with the question in his eyes, but Jude shook his head slightly.

"What exactly happened that night?" Evan asked.

"Jude and I snuck out with Taylor and Daria to tepee their friend's house." Connor explained, "Something about a birthday prank or something. Afterwards, Taylor suggested we go to her house, break into her dad's liquor cabinet, get drunk and make out. We did, and her dad though we were burglars so he fired at us and it hit me in the foot."

"God, bro. You're an idiot." Evan deadpanned exasperatedly.

"Why couldn't you guys just make out somewhere else?" Jimmy asked exasperatedly, "Like, I don't know, in the park near your house?"

"And why did you guys have to get drunk?" Mikey asked, "Taylor and Daria are hot enough."

"And there it is… the crux of the matter." Jude thought to himself as he shared a look with Connor.

Connor's look was a request for permission, which Jude granted with a nod.

"The drinking was for courage…" Connor began, "Because it wasn't Daria I wanted to make out with that night."

"Wait a second… you were cheating with Taylor?" Evan asked, horrified.

"What? NO!" Connor responded angrily, placing his hand face up on the table, "Don't be ridiculous."

"Then who was it? Was there somebody else out with you guys that night?" Evan asked, confused.

"No. It was just the four of us."

"Then who was it?" The three of the chorused.

Jude looked at them all and rolled his eyes before glancing at Connor's hand. If they needed it spelt out for them, that's what they'd get.

Jude scooted closer to Connor on the table bench, and placed his hand on Connor's. Connor threaded his fingers through Jude's to grip his hand tightly as he stared at his three friends. Comprehension immediately surfaced amongst the other trio as they stared at Jude and Connor's linked hands.

"Ooooh." Evan said, eyes a bit wide from shock but with a tiny smile on his face., "That's who you wanted to make out with."

"Wait, really?" Mikey exclaimed in surprise, "You wanted to make out with Jude?"

Connor gripped Jude's hand a little tighter.

"You two? You're gay for each other then?" Jimmy asked confused.

Connor glared at him.

"Yeah, I'm gay. Yeah, we're boyfriends now. Got a problem with that James?" He growled, using Jimmy's full first name.

"No, of course I don't." Jimmy exclaimed, sounding offended at the motion, "I didn't mean anything bad by it. Jesus."

"You could have worded it better, Jimmy." Evan said before turning back to them.

"S'okay." Connor said to Jimmy, "So, you guys don't care then? That I'm gay?"

"Nah, buddy. We don't care. I'm not even that surprised, you did always follow him around like a puppy." Evan said, before sharing a quick look with Mikey, "Besides… you're, uh, not the only one."

"Huh?" Connor asked in confusion.

Evan sat silently for a second before sighing and clearing his throat.

"I, uh. I'm gay too." He muttered softly. Mikey looked at him proudly and patted him on the back, "Kind of relieved that I'm not the only one, too."

"Why didn’t you ever tell me that?" Jimmy asked curiously.

"I only ever told Mikey," Evan said simply, "I just wasn’t ready for anybody else to know yet."

Jimmy nodded, and smiled at him.

"Take care of each other, yeah?" Evan said seriously to Jude and Connor, who nodded in agreement, "I'm happy for you both."

"How do you think the rest of the team will react."

"Expect a couple of jokes about you peaking at them in the showers, but other than that you should be fine." Mikey said lightly.

"Please, none of them are my type." Connor snarked, pointing at Jude, "He's my type."

"Yeah, we can see that." Jimmy joked.

"What's your dad think about this, by the way?" Evan said, pointing between Jude and Connor, "I can't imagine he's happy."

"No, he was definitely not happy in the slightest." Connor said, "He called me a faggot and…"

Evan growled.

"DON'T say that word." He hissed.

"Sorry, but… he did." Connor said, "He freaked out, called me names, slapped me once, threatened to send me to a conversion camp out of state. If Eric hadn't showed up, I'd be screwed."

"Your brother's back in town?" Evan asked.

"Yeah, Mom and Eric moved back to San Diego, so I'm staying with them at the moment." Connor said, "Dad has some stuff he needs to work on."

"What's his deal anyway?" Mikey asked.

Connor gave them a brief explanation about Adam's past, and all three boys looked saddened by that.

"Dude, that shit's rough." Evan said softly, "I'm sorry dude."

"You know if either of you ever need anything, we're here, right?" Mikey said strongly, "Both of you."

Connor smiled at them, and nodded his thanks.

The rest of that day had gone by well enough, with news of Jude and Connor's relationship slowly spreading until the whole school knew. In the days that followed, several people had sought the pair out and congratulated them on their bravery. Outside of school, Connor still spent a great deal of his free time at Jude's house, and that was where they could currently be found, lounging around in Jude's bedroom, on the verge of becoming the first recorded humans in the history of the word to literally be bored to death. Their current predicament was their current topic of discussion.

"What do you wanna do?" Jude asked with a yawn.

"Video Games?" Connor suggested.

"Nah, we've won them all." Jude interjected, "Go outside?"

"Crutches." Connor said.

"Oh, right." Jude conceded, "Ugh. I am SO BOOOORED!"

They lay in silence for a moment before Connor smirked and waggled his ears at Jude.

"Wanna make out?" Connor leered outrageously, his voice broadcasting that he was joking, and Jude snorted at his new boyfriend's silly display.

"You'd have to teach me how." Jude said, laughing lightly.

"What do you mean?"

"Well, I've never actually made out with anybody before, so…" Jude reminded Connor.

"But we've kissed before…" Connor said confused.

"Yeah, but we've never actually made out." Jude said, "All of our kisses are innocent little chaste pecks. None of them have even came remotely close to involving tongue."

"Oh. Yeah that makes sense I guess." Connor conceded, "Does that mean that you don't want to?"

"Well… I'm willing, but I don't want you to think I'm a bad kisser." Jude said.

"Oh, please." Connor scoffed, "It's you doing the kissing. Automatically makes it good."

Jude giggled and shoved Connor playfully.

"HEY! ABUSE!" Connor howled playfully.

"Oh hush you." Jude said and shoved him again.

In response to the shove Connor pinned Jude to the bed.

The two boys laughed at their sport, as Jude wriggled around and tried to escape Connor's clutches. He repeatedly failed, and eventually he stopped struggling.

"Okay, Okay, I give up! I give up!" Jude said, laughing lightly.

Connor laughed with him and the two stared at each other for a moment, the familiarity of the moment settling in and sobering them. The two stared at each other, awash in the feeling of déjà vu that settled over them like a shroud.

Connor swallowed nervously, and it was obvious that both boys were remembering the last time the two of them had been in this position, such a short time ago in the back yard instead of on Jude's bed.

Connor took a calming breath, and took his phone from his pocket and turned it off before throwing it next to his backpack. Jude looked at him curiously.

"What are you doing?" Jude asked him softly.

"What I should have done the first time." Connor said, slowly leaning in to whisper against Jude's lips, "I don't want any texts interrupting us this time."

As soon as he finished speaking, he pressed his lips to Jude's. Jude melted into the kiss, and enthusiastically returned it. The two of them sat up on the bed without allowing their lips to part, and continued. After a few minutes, Jude's lips parted to allow Connor entrance, and Connor took the invitation. Connor placed his hand on the back of Jude's head as they fought for dominance in their kiss as they began their first real makeout session.

Five minutes later, Jude and Connor separated with a wet pop and gasping for breath. The two boys looked at each other with wide eyes, taking in the other's disheveled appearance of messy hair and swollen lips. Both boys were inundated with new feelings, both mental and physical, that neither truly knew how to comprehend.

"Wow." Both boys breathed at the same time.

Both boys blushed the deepest possible shade of red.

"That was… incredible." Connor said, breathing heavily.

"Yeah." Jude agreed breathlessly, "You can say that again."

"And you thought you'd be a bad kisser." Connor said in disbelief, "That was… wow."

"Really?" Jude asked shyly.

"YEAH." Connor exclaimed, "I can barely think straight right now."

"Me neither." Jude agreed, "It's like my brain's been turned to mush."

"I foresee a lot of that in our future." Connor said seriously.

"Oh yeah. Definitely." Jude agreed, nodding, "But later. Any more of that right now and I'll probably explode."

Connor snorted at Jude's words, which turned into a fit of laughter that bordered on the maniacal.

"What's so funny?" Jude asked after Connor calmed down enough to speak.

"Kissing me making you explode." Connor repeated, "Think about that for a second."

Jude did just that, and his eyes widened in comprehension at the unintentional innuendo. He directed a withering glare at Connor as he turned even redder.

"Really, Connor?" Jude deadpanned, flicking Connor's ear, "Get your mind out of the gutter."

 _"No matter how true that is…"_ Jude thought to himself.

"Sorry. My brother's already got me corrupted. He does that with words all the time." Connor said apologetically.

"I noticed." Jude grumbled, remembering the way Eric had lost it when Connor joked about the nickname "Judicorn" and said Jude had a "sharp horn".

"You are right though." Connor said while trying not to laugh, "Any more of that and my brain is gonna melt completely. What else is there to do?

It was at that moment that Jude remembered a thought he'd had while sitting at the lunch table at Anchor Beach, while pitying Jesus's abysmal taste in music.

"Hey, you know any good music?" He asked, still trying to calm down.

"Um, depends on your taste I guess." Connor said.

"Cause, I've got Jesus's old iPhone, and the music on it is just trash."

"What kind of music do you consider trash?" Connor asked.

"Niki Minajj, Skrillex, Fall Out Boy, modern rap and country music. That kind of trash." Jude deadpanned.

Connor mock gagged.

"You poor soul." Connor said sadly, "I think you'll find my taste more to your liking. Most of what I got is classic rock, and a small amount of heavy metal."

"Like what?" Jude asked, "And how do I not know your taste in music by now?"

"I don't know how you don't know." Connor said teasingly, "I mean, we only spend every possible waking moment together."

"Ha, yeah." Jude laughed, "Anyway, what bands?"

"Um, Aerosmith. Rolling Stones. Guns N' Roses. Def Leppard. Led Zeppelin…"

"I like Led Zeppelin. Led Zeppelin IV is one of the favorite CD's." Jude said.

"Um, what else?" Connor said, trying to remember more bands, "Um, I used to listen to Trivium, but…"

"Benjji used to listen to them." Jude remembered.

"Benjji?" Connor asked.

"Remember how I was telling you about that foster home I was in where two of the three foster siblings where crazy?" Jude asked.

"Oh, yeah. I remember. He was the cool one." Connor said.

"Yeah, he liked this one song by them called _And Sadness Will Sear_." Jude said.

Connor flinched.

"I hate that song." He said, "It's about Mathew Shepard."

"Who?" Jude asked.

"A gay kid who the hate crimes bill was named after." Connor explained, "Laramie, Wyoming, sometime during the 1990's, kid got beaten almost to death by two guys. They left him in a field, tied to a fence in the middle of the night. He died in the hospital later that week."

Jude remembered a line from the song.

" _12:15 am, October 12th when the Shepard died._ " He quoted the lyric aloud.

"Yeah, exactly." Connor said, "Now that I know what you went through in your last foster home, I hate that dammed song even more."

Jude looked at him confused.

"Why?" Jude asked.

Connor looked at him as if he'd sprouted a second head.

"You got beat up by your last foster father because in his eyes you were _acting gay_ by wearing a dress. That's what you told me." Connor said stiffly, "If Callie hadn't taken a baseball bat to the windshield of that assholes car, he might not have stopped hitting you. One swing to many, or one swing that was harder than the last, and you wouldn't be here. You would have been another name on the list of people who were killed because of bigotry and ignorance."

"And that song reminds you of all that?" Jude asked for confirmation.

Connor nodded.

"Thinking about you getting hurt… it kills me Jude." Connor said softly, "If I lost you, I'd be losing my best friend as well as my boyfriend, all in one swoop."

"It takes a lot to bring me down. I'm too stubborn." Jude said, trying to lighten the mood, "Anyway, what other bands?"

"Um, let me think…" Connor said, extremely grateful for the change of subject, "Metal wise, you might like Avenged Sevenfold, Metallica, and Anthrax. Maybe Megadeth or Motorhead."

"Benjji liked them too." Jude said.

"Which one?" Connor asked.

"Motorhead." Jude said, "He had a signed poster of Lemmy Kilmister framed on his wall."

"I wanna meet this guy." Connor said seriously, "You should see if he's still around, he sounds like he'd be cool."

"Yeah, maybe. It'd be good to see him." Jude said, "Anyway, what else?"

"That's all the metal I can think of right now. Classic rock wise? The Doors, Pink Floyd." Connor listed, "And uh... well hang on a second, I've got it here somewhere."

He rose from the beanbag chair and stumbled across the room to his backpack. He reached into it and extracted a jeweled CD case and handed it to Jude.

Jude surveyed the case. On the cover was a color photo of four men, walking single file across a crosswalk. The lead man had long hair and an equally thick beard, and was wearing a white suit. One of the men was wearing no shoes, and carried a cigarette in his right hand. One of them was wearing all denim. Jude recognized the album, feeling surprised that Connor had it in his possession.

"Isn't this...?"

"The Beatles, yeah." Connor said quietly, looking at the CD case with a look of shy fondness, "Abbey Road. Turns out it's not just a band that only old people like."

The last was said teasingly, and Jude laughed as he remembered the first moments of the first time they hung out at Jude's house together to work on their shared science project. It seemed like so long ago, even if it wasn't even a year ago.

"I only said that because you looked so confused when mama brought them up that time." Jude explained.

"Jude, babe, that wasn't a look of confusion." Connor deadpanned as Jude blushed at the new term of endearment, "That was a look of disbelief that she actually made that pun. Everybody knows who the Beatles are, silly. Unless they live under a rock or in North Korea. I have a lot of their music on my computer. Including _Hey Jude_ , and I love that song. Even more now."

Connor winked at Jude when he finished. Jude snorted and leaned in to place a kiss to Connor's cheek.

"Silly boy." Jude said fondly.

Connor smiled at him and looked back at the CD.

"We can listen to it if you want." Jude offered.

"Yeah. Track 7 is the best one." Connor said softly, "Here Comes The Sun."

Jude moved to his computer, and gently opened the case to extract the disc. He placed it in the drive of the computer with care, and skipped to track 7.

"Which one of them sings this one?" Jude asked.

"George sings lead vocals on this one." Connor said.

Jude pushed play, and a pleasing acoustic guitar sound flowed from the speakers. A few seconds later, a smooth voice began to sing.

 _**Here comes the sun** _  
_**Here comes the sun,** _  
_**I say, It's alright.** _

_**Little darling** _  
_**It's been a long,** _  
_**Cold lonely winter.** _

_**Little darling,** _  
_**It feels like years** _  
_**Since it's been here.** _

_**Here comes the sun** _  
_**Here comes the sun,** _  
_**I say, It's alright.** _

Connor, who had been humming a long, began to sing the song quietly to himself while he stared out the window.

 _**Little darling,** _  
_**The smile's returning** _  
_**To their faces.** _

_**Little darling,** _  
_**It seems like years** _  
_**Since it's been here.** _

_**Here comes the sun** _  
_**Here comes the sun,** _  
_**I say, It's alright.** _

_**Sun, sun, sun, here it comes.** _  
_**Sun, sun, sun, here it comes.** _  
_**Sun, sun, sun, here it comes.** _  
_**Sun, sun, sun, here it comes.** _  
_**Sun, sun, sun, here it comes.** _

_**Little darling,** _  
_**I feel that ice** _  
_**Is slowly melting.** _

_**Little darling,** _  
_**It seems like years** _  
_**Since it's been clear.** _

_**Here comes the sun** _  
_**Here comes the sun,** _  
_**I say, It's alright.** _

_**Here comes the sun** _  
_**Here comes the sun,** _  
_**It's alright.** _

_**It's alright.** _

As the song ended, Connor looked out the window and let out a sigh, wiping away the moisture gathering in his eyes. Jude paused the album and scooted closer to him, placing a hand on his shoulder and giving it a comforting squeeze.

"Are you okay?" Jude asked softly.

"Yeah." Connor said, "I just remember hearing that song for the first time."

Jude looked at him with an inquisitive look.

"What happened the first time you heard it?" Jude asked.

"I cried." Connor revealed shakily.

Jude immediately looked concerned.

"I was feeling really sad." Connor continued, "Really lonely. It was right after Daria and I started going out. I knew that I was hurting you by doing it. I knew that I was lying to myself and everybody else I knew, but it was the only way I could think of that our friendship could continue and it was all I could do not to cry."

"Connor, you know I don't blame you or hold any o that against you…" Jude tried to interject.

"I know, but I still felt like shit about it." Connor cut him off softly, "I was sitting in my room, listening to the radio and this song came on. I listened to that song, and for the first time in years, I cried like a baby. I went on iTunes and bought it and listened to it again. Anytime things got too tough, every time my Dad said something, every time I got sad or depressed, I would turn that song on and put it on loop. It made me feel... happy. Safe. Hopeful. Like there was something better waiting for me in the future. It reminded me that no matter how dark and cloudy my world got, the sun was always just on the other side of the clouds."

Jude wrapped Connor in a tight embrace, and he started crying into his shoulder softly. A few minutes later, they separated. Connor looked at Jude. The two boys offered each other a soft smile.

"And I know it sounds really cheesy, but the sun on the other side was always gonna be you." Connor said softly and shyly, blushing at his words.

Jude couldn't help the face splitting grin that overtook his face at those words, nor did he even try to hide it. He grabbed Connor in a fierce embrace, burying his face in his shoulder.

The two spent the next couple of hours filling Jude's iTunes library with an assortment of music from Connor's vast collection that Jude found to his liking.

"Um, Jude?"

The boys turned away from the computer to face the door and Lena, who was standing there with a nervous expression on their face.

"What's wrong, momma?" Jude asked, pausing the music.

"Ritchie and Adam are down stairs." She revealed, "Adam wants to talk to you, Jude."

 


	7. Chapter 7

Connor's POV:

Jude and I shared a look. In the time since the big confrontation at my dad's house, he had sought Eric, Jude and I and apologized to us in person, but other than that, he tended to stay away from Jude and I. The fact that he was coming to us, meant it was something important. My dad had promised me and Jude a thorough explanation about the camp. I couldn't help but wonder if that was what was about to happen.

"My dad wants to talk to Jude?" I clarify just to be sure I heard them right.

"You don't have to if you don't want to, honey." Lena promises.

"No, I'll talk to him." Jude said softly, rising from the bed, "We told him we would help him. I'm gonna keep my promise."

"I'll be right there with you." I promised, recieving a small smile from my boyfriend.

We stood, Jude with his arm clutching mine to help me down the stairs. We walked into the living room to find my Dad pacing back and forth nervously, while Ritchie was sitting in a chair watching him with an exasperated expression. In the doorway, Eric stood watching the scene and nodded at us in acknowledgement of our presence, which we returned.

"I'll leave you guys to talk." Lena said, "I'll be in the kitchen if you need me."

I offered her a thankful smile as she made her exit.

"Will you stop pacing?" Ritchie deadpanned, "It's talking to your son and his boyfriend, not facing an execution."

Adam simply glared lightly in response before rolling his eyes affectionately at him.

I couldn't help but notice how similar Dad and Ritchie's interactions were to mine with Jude. It was like looking into a funhouse mirror that showed what we'd look like in twenty years.

I cleared my throat to announce our presence, and my Dad turned to both of us.

"Jude, Connor." Dad greeted nervously with a small nod to both of us.

"Hey Dad." I greeted.

"Mr. Stevens." Jude said in return.

"It's Adam, Jude. Mr. Stevens makes me feel old." Dad said, and I could see the makings of a small smile shining through. Jude nodded.

"Okay. Adam."

"How you feeling, Dad?" I asked, genuinely curious.

"Oh, uh, I'm doing better." Dad said softly, "Ritchie and your mom have helped a lot. In fact, they barely leave my side most of the time. I forgot how good of a friend your mother was when I need her. Ritchie took me up north to see where the camp used to stand. Place is a Boy Scout camp now. It was therapeutic."

"That's good." I said.

The awkwardness permeated the air, and I could feel Jude shuffle his feet next to me.

"Well, this is awkward." Eric said and broke the silence, "How about we all sit down? I'm assuming you called this meeting for a reason, Dad?"

"Yeah, uh. I did." Dad said as we all sat down, "First, since I don't think I can ever say it enough, I wanted to tell you again how sorry I am for what I put you all through."

"We know, Dad." Connor said gently, "You don't have to keep saying it. We understand. You don't have to worry about it, okay?"

Dad nodded.

"What do you two know about conversion therapy?" Dad asked after a moment's hesitation.

Jude and I shared a look, and then shrugged when neither of us offered an answer.

"Nothing. Except for what Eric has told us." Jude answered, "Never had a reason to find out until now."

"Well… my, uh, therapist has told me that talking about it will help me put it behind me," Dad continued, "And if anybody deserves to know, it's you three."

Eric, Jude and I nodded in understanding.

"You don't have to tell us if you don't want to, Dad." I promised gently.

"Yes I do." Dad argued softly, "I know it's going to be hard for me, for all of us, but it's the only way you will truly understand. Most of the stuff they did to me is now illegal, and I wouldn't wish it on my own worst enemy. The memory still hurts… and you all deserve to know."

I pause momentarily to consider the irony of Dad saying he wouldn't wish it on his own worst enemy when he had wanted to send me to one directly after the shooting incident. I shook my head clear of the thought, scolding myself. I knew that my dad hadn't been in his right mind at the time, and I shouldn't blame him for it. Old habits, however, are a bitch to kill.

"Okay. Whenever you're ready." Jude said gently.

"What do you want to know?" Dad asked.

"What kind of things did they do to you?" I asked quietly, and nervously.

"Uh…" Dad began, "The practice operates mainly on the belief that homosexuality is a mental disorder that can be cured with treatment. The tried a lot of stuff. I remember being forced to pray for hours on end, and being whipped when I refused or stopped, while my _councilors_ stood by and told us that it was for our own good. They prescribed a bunch of medicine. I took them once. All they did was made me nauseous and give me headaches. Quack meds, I used to call it. I flushed them after that, tricked them into thinking I was still taking them by mimicking the effects while in their presence."

"What else?" Eric asked.

"Electroconvulsive therapy." Dad answered, "That was a favorite of theirs. Basically what they did was strap me to a chair and stick needles into the tips of my fingers. They would then show me images of men in explicit positions via a projector and shocking me. It was meant to trick my brain into associating anything gay with pain."

My grip on Jude's hand tightened to a near vice grip, and he winced.

"Sorry." I said quietly.

"It's fine." Jude responded, "Just don't break my hand."

"They tried an exorcism on me once." Dad continued, "It involved me being thrown to the ground and having a bunch of people stand on my hands and feet to pin me to the floor while a preacher screamed at me. I still remember some of the stupid shit they would scream. _Come on, you homosexual demon! You homosexual spirit, we call you out right now! Lose your grip, Lucifer!_ Ha. What a crock of shit. They tried to hypnotize me…"

"You're fucking kidding me right?" Eric blurted in disbelief, "Hypnosis? Seriously? How stupid were these people?"

"Well, obviously, they were very stupid. Otherwise we wouldn't be here." Ritchie mumbled darkly.

"Through all of this shit, I made it a month." Adam mumbled, "A month of that torture before I broke. I kept telling myself: don't let them break you, and don't let them take away who you are. In the end, it was just too much. In the end, I gave up. They said I was cured, and I was allowed to go home."

"The young man struggles on and on he's known, a vow unto his own that never from this day, his will they'll take away." Eric mutters under his breath.

Dad heard what he'd mumbled, and cracked a small smile.

"Yeah," He said, "Pretty much."

"Huh?" I asked confused.

"It's a Metallica lyric." Eric answered, "It's in the song "The Unforgiven" from the Black Album. Basically means he tried not to let them break him."

"Oh. Okay, makes sense." I conceded.

"My parents were worried about me for the first month I was back because all I did was sulk." Dad continued softly, "I never did see my grandparents again, and I now know that they cut all ties with them after they saw what that place did to me. They told me when I saw them last that they were also wishing they'd never sent me there…"

"Yeah, you're damn right they shouldn't have!" I exploded suddenly and made Jude jump, "There was nothing wrong with you in the first place! Believe me, I'm not done with them yet. You've had your chance to rail at them, Dad. I haven't yet, and believe me when I say that they will feel my wrath for what we've gone through over this crap."

"Connor." Dad said sternly, "I know you're angry at them. So was I… hell, I tried to tackle my dad when I saw him last, and the only reason I didn't was because Ritchie stopped me. But ranting isn't going to help anything. They feel terrible about what they did, but they didn't have a choice. If they hadn't followed my grandparents' orders, we would have been screwed. They ruled the family with an iron fist, and they were terrifying. My grandfather threatened them, told my parents he would beat me to death if they didn't have me _cured_. It was his fault, and the old bastard is dead and buried. The only thing left of him is his rather impressive amount of money, which thanks to my parents I now control. Am I still angry at them? Yes. Very. Because of them, I turned into an asshole and it caused my boyfriend to try to commit suicide…"

"Oh for fuck sake, Adam." Ritchie interrupted crossly, "How many times do I have to hammer it through your thick skull that it _was NOT your fault_?"

"And how many times do I have to tell you that it was?" Dad mumbled petulantly.

"You know what? That's it!" Ritchie exclaimed frustrated, "You think it was your fault? I'm going to prove to you that it wasn't! Tell me, Adam Stevens, if my suicide attempt was really your fault would I willingly do this?"

Without another second's hesitation, Ritchie reached forward and grabbed the front of my Dad's shirt and yanked him forward. Their lips collided and my Dad's eyes snapped open wide in shock. After a split second, he returned the kiss savagely. It only lasted about ten seconds before the two separated with a wet pop.

Dad blinked several times and joined the other occupants of the room in staring at Ritchie in surprise. I snuck a peak at Jude out of the corner of my and saw that his jaw had once again dropped and that his eyes had widened to the size of saucers.

"Do you believe me now?" Ritchie asked gently, "If it was your fault, I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't have just kissed you. You wouldn't be my boyfriend, and that IS what you are. You ARE my boyfriend. It's gonna take a hell of a lot more than this crap to scare me off, am I clear?"

Dad simply nodded.

"Um. Yeah. Haha. Wow." Dad mumbled quietly, and a small smile started to stretch across his face.

"Okay… so THAT just happened." Jude whispered to me.

I simply nodded.

My Dad just kissed a guy. Willingly. Aaaaaaaand now he's smiling like a complete goofball.

After this little event, I was suddenly struck by how bizarre the situation was. Two months ago, the thought that me, my boyfriend, my dad and his childhood boyfriend/now current boyfriend, and my brother would be sitting together having a rational discussion that bordered on bonding was a laughable thought that bordered on fanciful.

"Well, uh… congrats to you two." I said, "But am I the only one who thinks this is strange? That we're bonding over this right now?"

Dad snapped himself out of his shocked daze and nodded, all the while with a small, barely noticeable, goofy smile on his face.

"Yeah, it is." Dad said, and Ritchie, whose hand was now safely clutched in my Dad's hand, nodded.

"Not exactly what I would have preferred for a family bonding exercise." Eric muttered darkly, "Bonding over the fact that all three of us have psychological trauma. Dad from the camp, Connor from the shooting, me from combat and… other stuff. Maybe next time we can do something typical for a family. Camping? Fishing? Go to an amusement park? How about paintballing, or something that doesn't come straight out of a television show."

Silence fell, and I looked over at my brother, and I could tell he was struggling with something.

"You know… that's not the only thing that we both have in common, dad." Eric finally said shakily.

Dad and I both looked at him questioningly, a confused expression stretching across our faces.

"What do you mean?" Dad asked.

Eric stared at him for a moment, debating on whether or not to vocalize his inner dialogue. After a minute's silence, he ran his fingers through his hair and continued.

"We both lost somebody we loved in extreme circumstances." Eric said, "The difference is, you got Ritchie back after all these years. I can't get mine back."

Dad and I shared a look of horror, before returning our attention to Eric.

"What do you mean?" I asked in confusion. I had never heard of my brother having any form of relationship.

Eric made eye contact with me, and sighed sadly.

"I met her when I was still in high school." Eric recalled, a sad smile on his face, "Her name was Amelia. By the time you were old enough to understand anything about it, Connor, I had moved out."

"I remember her." Dad interjected, "Tall, long black hair? Wasn't she your first girlfriend?"

"Yeah, that's her." Eric confirmed, "We were inseparable from the very start. Amelia was the only person I knew who really got me, you know. After mom and I left for Los Angeles when I graduated, Amelia came with us. After about five months in L.A. she started to distance herself from me, and when I confronted her about it, she told me why."

He looked up at all of us, and our eyes collectively asked for him to continue with his story.

"She was pulling away from me…" Eric continued shakily, "Because she didn't think I'd love her anymore when she told me that she was transgender."

My eyes widened at the admission, and out of the corner of my eye I could see Jude's jaw drop and nearly grace the floor with its presence. I snuck a peak at my dad, and could see that he was shifting in his seat a little bit, while his eyes were a weird mix of sadness and uncertainty. Ritchie was staring at Eric with nothing but pure sympathy.

"I remember the day she told me." Eric continued, "I went over to her apartment, and when I confronted her, she started crying. She told me that she couldn't keep it up anymore, that she couldn't keep going like she had been, by hiding who she really was. I asked her what she meant, and she told me that she was transgender and she had made the decision to begin transitioning. The way she looked at me… it was like she expected me to flip out and hit her. She nearly fainted when I told her I was going to stick by her and help her through it. The smile on her face when I said that made it worth it. I asked him what he wanted me to call him, and he told me to call him Andrew. He could barely contain the smile when I suddenly started referring to him by male pronouns. He looked like he'd inherited the Earth. He buzzed his hair off the next day. When his doctor put him on testosterone, I was right there with him."

He was smiling as he remembered the events, and I could see the depth of the love in his eyes as he spoke. I felt Jude's hand slip into mine, and I gave it a firm squeeze before leaning my head on his shoulder. He leaned his head against mine, and I sighed contently as Eric continued the story.

"When he underwent the mastectomy, I was right there with him." Eric continued, "Neither of us were sure what it would mean for Us, but when Andrew was finally able to come home from the hospital, he came home with me. We lay in bed that night, and I just watched him sleep. After about an hour, he cuddled up to me. That's when I realized… I realized that his gender didn't matter to me. That he was still the same beautiful person that I had fallen for back in high school. He had always been a boy, and even though I hadn't known at the time, it had never mattered. The only difference at that point, was that what he was on the outside finally matched what he was on the inside. He was finally, truly happy, and I was his everything, and he was mine and I didn't want to let him go."

The happiness in his eyes began to cloud over with sadness.

"When he told me he wanted to join the Air Force, I went with him." Eric continued, "We became fighter pilots together, and he became my wingman. It wasn't easy to do, with him being transgender, but we did it. Everybody knew that messing with him meant messing with me too, so they left him alone. We made it though, and when we flew a mission, we never went without the other. We always had each others' six."

He pulled a ring off of his left middle finger and displayed it to us. It was a platinum band with a single diamond inlaid in it. It was obviously an engagement ring.

"I was gonna give him this." Eric said, his voice haunted and pained, "I was gonna ask him to marry me when our tour of duty was over, but he never made it home."

"What happened?" I asked.

"It was a routine mission." Eric said softly, "We were due to be heading home in four days. Our tour was almost over. We took off from base that day in standard formation. It was just us two. Our target was a small compound in the desert. Routine bombing run, provide air support if needed. The Taliban had their heels dug in deep, and they weren't going down without a fight. Everything was going smoothly, until I heard Andrew start to panic over the comms. He said that somebody on the ground had fired a Stinger missile at me. The sensors in my jet started going crazy, and I took evasive action. I couldn't shake it off. I was about to die. Then over the comms I hear Andrew tell me to pull up sharp and roll, and then he said he was sorry and that he loved me and not to forget that. I looked back just in time to see h-his jet f-fly r-right into the m-missiles path and e-e-explode. He never had a chance to eject."

The first tear finally fell, and I could practically see the memory replaying in front of my brother's eyes.

"I watched what was left of the plane hit the ground, and I lost it. I knew there was no way he could have survived the impact." Eric continued as he began to tremble, "I let my rage take control of my actions, and I turned the jet around and flew back towards the compound. I radioed in a warning to any friendly ground forces to evacuate the area. When I was in range, I fired everything I had at the place. Every missile I had, all at once. Leveled the place, but not before one of the bastards landed a hit on my plane with one of their anti aircraft guns. It clipped the wing, so I aimed the jet right at the bastards and bailed out. I watched my jet crash into the compound and explode. As soon as my boots hit the ground, and I freed myself from the harness, I took off running for what was left of Andy's jet. I pulled his body out of it, and radioed in for evac. I didn't let go of Andy until we were back at base. I carried him inside myself. That was the last time I ever flew a mission… or even flew at all."

I got up from my seat and wobbled over to my brother, and wrapped him in a soft hug, burying my face in his shoulder.

"I'm so sorry." I said.

We sat there for a moment in silence before Eric continued.

"I got my revenge." Eric said quietly.

"What do you mean?" Dad asked.

"The guy who fired the stinger was captured, and taken back to base." Eric explained, "He got free when they were transferring him to another interrogation room, and he stole his escort's pistol. I chased after him, and I shot him in the back of the head."

Collectively, all of our eyes widened.

"I know I've killed before." Eric continued, "I flew so many missions that I lost count. I've leveled buildings. But this guy, he was the only person that I ever killed up close."

My arms tightened around him.

"My tour ended, I was deemed mentally unfit for combat and I was discharged. I flew home on the same cargo plane that his casket was on." Eric continued, "Me and three others carried the casket off the plane. After his funeral, I washed my hands of the Air Force and swore I'd never go back. They've asked me to reenlist a dozen times, and my answer is always the same. I blamed them for his death. If he'd never joined, I never would have followed him. If he'd never joined, he would still be alive right now and I wouldn't have had a broken heart. I moved on eventually, went to college and got my degree. It's what he would have wanted."

Dad looked at Eric, and a tear fell as Dad rose to approach Eric. I unwrapped myself from Eric, and trotted over to plop down next to Jude, who immediately wrapped his arms around me tightly. Dad knelt down in front of Eric, and the two stared at each other for a moment. Slowly, ever so slowly, Dad leaned forward and wrapped his arms around my brother. Eric tensed momentarily before he sunk into the embrace and returned it fiercely.

"I'm so sorry, buddy." Dad whispered to him.

I smiled lightly as I watched my brother and father hug for the first time I could ever remember.

This continued for ten minutes, as my brother cried into our dad's shoulder. My dad pulled out of the hug first and stood.

"You okay?" He asked.

Eric laughed tearily.

"Yeah. I think I am. Dad." Eric returned.

Dad turned back toward me and Jude.

"Now for the other thing I was going to do." Dad said to himself as he stepped forward, his attention focused on Jude, "Jude, if you could stand please? There is something else I need to say to you."

Jude stood as he was asked, looking unsure of what was about to happen.

"Jude, you and I got off on the wrong foot before." Dad continued nervously, "And you have dealt with all of this far better than anybody else could have. You have shown that you have strong character, maturity, compassion, and above all else… you've shown that you care deeply for my son. You've always had his best interests at heart. You've always done right by him. Truth be told… you are perfect for him, and I'm sorry I didn't see it before. What I'm trying to say is… you have my blessing."

Jude's composure broke as soon as my dad finished speaking, and he moved forward and threw his arms around my dad in a hug.

"Thank you." Jude whispered.

"You never have to thank me." Dad promised, "Just take care of my boy, that's thanks enough"

Jude looked towards me, and we made eye contact.

"I will. I promise."

And I knew he would, just as I would with him.


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hi everyone, my name is WritingIsLoveAndLife and I’ll be taking over this story for Nuke Rose, who asked me to do so quite a while back now. With his outlines guiding me, I will complete the story.
> 
> I myself am a big fan of the original author, so I’m honored to have been the one he asked to continue this project. He has become a great friend and colleague to me. I know that I have some big shoes to fill, but hopefully, I can do the story justice by the original author, and by all the readers.
> 
> Please enjoy Chapter 8 of One Change.

It’s exactly 12 o’clock noon when I rap my knuckles on the front door of the Adams-Foster residence. Almost instantly, the door swings wide, revealing Lena.

“Connor!” She exclaims. “Jude didn’t tell us you were coming.”

“I’m sorry to just show up unannounced, Mrs. Adams-Foster,” I say sincerely. “I just really need to see Jude right now, if that’s alright.”

She steps aside and ushers me into the house. “He’s just upstairs in his bedroom right now, you can go up. Lunch will be ready soon, okay?”

“Thanks, Lena,” I say, surprised at how naturally her given name comes to me in this particular moment, given my usual problems addressing her as anything other than Mrs. Adams-Foster.

I bound up the stairs. As I ascend to the upper level, I hear Stef yell her usual warning to keep the door to the bedroom open, and I laugh lightly, the familiarity of the warning taking my mind temporarily off of why it is that I am here, and what it is that I will be doing.

I hear music playing as I knock on the door of the bedroom that Jude and Jesus share. I hear my boyfriend’s voice rise above the volume of the music.

“Come in!” he calls, and I twist the handle, and walk into the room.

“Hope I’m not interrupting anything,” I say, as Jude rushes off the bed and wraps me in a hug. Pulling back, he pecks me lightly on the lips, causing Jesus to fake-gag.

“Get a room!” He tells us.

Jude sticks his tongue out at his brother, and kisses me once more. I hear, rather than see, Jesus leave the room, muttering something about being blinded.

Jude pulls back again. “He’s so dramatic sometimes,” He huffs. “And he calls Mariana a drama queen.”

I laugh and peck his cheek. “You’re too cute, babe,” I say matter-of-factly.

He blushes, and goes to turn down the volume of the music, before falling back on his bed.

“To what do I owe the pleasure, Con?” he asks. “I wasn’t expecting to see you until Monday at school.”

“What?” I ask, a little too quickly. “A guy can’t surprise his boyfriend with a little visit?”

Jude rights himself, and his eyes narrow.

“You said that too fast,” He informs me. “Now try again. Only, this time, tell me what’s really going on.”

I sigh. “I can never get anything past you, can I?” I question.

“Nope!” he exclaims, popping the p. “Now, tell me what’s going through that head of yours.”

I inhale and exhale.

“I’m going to confront my grandparents for what they did to my dad,” I tell him.

I see Jude ponder this information, before his eyes lock on me. “I’m assuming you’re asking me to come with you?”

I nod. “I wouldn’t have anyone else by my side.”

He huffs. “You’re impossible to say no to, Connor Stevens.”

“Does that mean you’ll come with me?” I ask hopefully.

He rolls his eyes at my expression, and closes the distance between us. “Of course, you big dork,” He says, flashing me a smile, before pecking me chastely on the lips.

We break our kiss just as we hear Stef and Lena call us for lunch. Jude calls down, answering for both of us.

“We’ll be down in a minute,” He announces, before turning his gaze on me once more, “What are we going to tell them? There’s no way they’d allow us to do this.”

“How does a mall date sound to you?” I question.

“Perfectly inconspicuous.” He answers. 

“Then, that’s the story. Now let’s get down to lunch before your Moms sic themselves on us… or worse, Mariana.”

Jude laughs and nods, intertwining our fingers together, and we descend the staircase. The entire lunch, I can’t help but feel that Jude thinks my plan for confrontation is actually a bad idea…

***************

During lunch, Jude asked Stef and Lena if the two of us could go to the mall for a few hours, which they easily okayed, provided Jude and I carry our cell phones on us at all times, in case we need them for anything, and that Eric drive us to and from.

We both agreed, and I could feel Jude tense beside me at having to lie to his mothers. I squeezed his hand, and I felt him relax at the gesture.

After lunch, he excused himself to get ready; coming down 15 minutes later with his hair freshly gelled, wearing a blue polo shirt, and a pair of dark-wash denim jeans.

“You look nice,” I comment, as I push myself up off the living room floor. I kiss his cheek, and feel my cell phone buzz in my pocket. I extract it, and peer at the screen, seeing a message from Eric:

Eric: I’m outside to escort you both.

“Eric’s here,” I relay to Jude. “You ready to go?”

“As I’ll ever be,” He tells me. He calls out to Stef and Lena that we’re going, and once getting a response from them, moves to slip on his shoes.

I follow him, jamming my feet into my own sneakers.

“Let’s do this,” Jude says.

I nod, following him out the door. As Eric’s truck pulled out of the Adams-Foster’s driveway and we started the drive to my grandparents place, I could only think one thought:

‘I’m going to make them answer for what they did, Dad…’ My fist clenches. ‘I swear it. Even if it’s the last thing I ever do.’

****************

As we get closer to my grandparents house, I can feel my blood boiling in my veins. I’m just so angry with both of them.

To do what they did to their only child, a child that they were supposed to love unconditionally… it just is incomprehensible. My father has suffered so much over the years, this place they sent him to in an attempt to “fix” him, ended up being the one thing in all these years that was able to break him.

And their actions have had a direct impact on me too.

They caused me to be miserable at the hands of my father for years, both before Jude came into the picture and after, as a result of their one decision from years ago.

I will never be able to look at them quite the same way as I used to. And that’s if I can manage to look at them at all.

Eric pulls into the driveway, and parks the truck. The three of us disembark and make our way up to the front door. Epic raps his knuckles.

“Here goes nothing,” I breathe.

I feel Jude squeeze my hand, and I turn my head toward him. “You’re okay,” he mouths.

I nod, feeling less tense, but still on edge. The door swings wide, revealing my Grandmother.

“Connor!” she exclaims. “What an unexpected surprise! And you brought a friend, and Eric! Come in!”

She moves to allow the three of us entry. We take off our shoes, and she leads us to the kitchen.

“Can I get you anything?” she asks, smiling at all three of us.

“An explanation, if you will…” I mutter.

She freezes, turning around. “I beg your pardon?” she asks.

I sigh. “Is Grandfather here?” I ask.

She moves to the back door, which leads out to the deck. “Joe!” she calls. “Connor and Eric are here!”

“Are you sure this is a good idea, Con?” Jude whispers to me, while my grandmother’s back is turned.

“OF COURSE IT IS!” I snap, unable to keep myself from remaining quiet. “WE NEED ANSWERS, AND THEY’RE THE ONLY TWO WHO CAN GIVE THEM TO US!”

“What are you yelling about, Connor?” My grandfather asks.

“Yes,” My grandmother continues. “What could you possibly want to know that the two of us could help you with?”

“I want to know why you did what you did to your son,” I growl. “He didn’t need to be fixed any more than I do.”

“What on Earth are you talking about?” My grandmother exclaims. “We never did anything to Adam.”

I bark out a humourless laugh. “That’s funny…” I say. “Do the name’s Ritchie or Lost Hills ring a bell?”

They blanch. ‘Got them!’ I think.

“You didn’t think you could get away with that, did you?” I question. “DID YOU?”

My grandmother starts crying.

“Oh, hush!” I deadpan. “Just tell me why… That’s all I ask. Why would you send my father… your son… to one of those places?”

“We didn’t have a choice!” My grandmother sobs.

“THERE’S ALWAYS A CHOICE!” I thunder. “YOU TWO ARE LUCKY I’M EVEN ALLOWING YOU TO EXPLAIN RATHER THAN JUST LOSING IT!”

“But why does it matter so much to you?” My grandmother questions. “It was years ago…”

I reach for Jude’s hand, intertwining our fingers in a vice grip.

“He is my father. I love him. Your decision impacted him in such a way that he became a shell of himself. He terrified me. He tried to keep me and my boyfriend apart just like you two did to him and Ritchie. He tried to send me to one of those places too…”

Jude squeezes my hand, and I instantly relax. I grace him with a small smile.

“Thank you,” I say, pressing a kiss to his cheek.

I turn and face my grandparents again, my eyes smoldering with tightly controlled anger.

“Yes, I’m gay too. Go on and try something! I dare you!”

Jude sends me a warning look. I squeeze his hand in acknowledgement, inhaling and exhaling until I’ve calmed down.

I turn to my grandparents.

“Here is what’s going to happen,” I tell them, my tone leaving no room for disagreement. “The five of us are going to sit down at the table and you two are going to start talking. If you don’t, I can promise you that when I walk out that front door it will be the last time you ever see me.”

“Can I get you all some iced tea?” My grandmother asks.

“I don’t need iced tea,” I say coldly. “I need answers. And I need them now.”

“Let’s sit then.”

The five of us pull out chairs. When we are seated, there is silence for a while. I break it.

“I’m waiting…” I tell them, tapping my wrist with my fingers to signal that they should get on with it already.

My grandmother inhales and exhales.

“This is going to sound awful… but we really had no choice but to send your father… to that place.”

“There is always a choice,” I retort sharply. I feel Jude squeeze my hand hard. I turn to him.

“Let her finish, Con,” He tells me. “You came here for answers, and you’ll get them, but you have to let your grandparents speak, okay?”

“Fine,” I huff. “You’re right.”

“As usual,” Jude teases, pressing a kiss to my cheek.

“Whatever helps you sleep at night, babe,” I tease back.

It’s nice to know that in a tense situation, I can always rely on Jude to keep me from losing sight of myself. No matter their awful choices, the people sitting across from me are still my grandparents.

“I’m sorry about that,” I say to my grandmother. “Please continue. Tell me why, as you put it you ‘had no choice but to send my father… to that place’”

I see my grandmother sigh, turning towards my grandfather and reaching for his hand.

“It’s alright, Cassandra,” He soothes her. “We’ve wanted to get this off our chest for over 20 years.”

She nods, and turns back to Eric, Jude and I.

“Does he have to be here?” She questions, indicating Jude. “This really is a family matter.”

“Considering he is my boyfriend, and the fact that he is the only reason I have not lost what little self-control I have right now, I’d say he very much needs to be here. Dad treated him just as bad as me before I came out, you know.”

“I’m sorry about that,” My grandmother says to Jude. “If we’d have never…” she trails off, bursting into tears.

It takes a while for my grandfather to console her. When she has recomposed herself, Jude tells her, “Ma’am, after being in 7 different foster homes in 7 years with a myriad of negligent and abusive foster parents, dealing with Adam as he was back then was nothing I couldn’t handle.”

She just nods, and returns her focus to me.

“It was your great-grandfather, Connor,” she says. “He said—” her voice breaks. “He said, that if we didn’t send Adam to that place, he would beat Adam to death and throw us out of our home.”

“How would that have even been possible?” I demand. “You own this place, right?”

“We’ve owned it for several years, yes, but the house was originally in your great-grandfather’s name. He owned it at the time, and he could’ve thrown us out. He said that he wouldn’t if we sent Adam to… that place.”

“You two are cowards!” I snap. “You sacrifice your only son to keep the roof over your own worthless hides?” I’m seething now. “You sicken me, the both of you.”

“You don’t mean that,” My grandmother cries. “Please, Connor! We know it sounds bad, but there was something else too…”

“I’m listening…”

My grandmother inhales and exhales again. “We borrowed money from your great-grandfather. One million dollars, to be precise, and back then, that was even more money then it is now. We tried to stand against him, and tell him that we wouldn’t send Adam where he wanted… but he threatened to bankrupt us. We really had no choice…”

I look between her and my grandfather with unconcealed scorn.

“You know?” I tell them. “I don’t know which scenario is worse. Either way, you were shooting yourself in the foot.”

I feel Jude flinch violently next to me, and I realize why instantly. I turn my attention to him, cupping his cheek with my hand.

“I’m sorry, babe,” I tell him. “Bad metaphor.”

He nods, saying no words, but his eyes express his forgiveness for my insensitive slip of tongue.

“I think it’s about time we left, boys,” Eric announces. He looks to me. “Did you get what you needed from this?”

“I got enough,” I say. Because really, no amount of explanation will ever be enough to justify what they did. But I came here to confront them and ask them why, and I’ve gotten them to tell me that much.

Eric nods. “All right, then! Let’s get going.”

Jude and I nod, and see ourselves to the front door, my grandparents following on our heels.

“Connor!” My grandmother calls out to me as I walk down the walkway to Eric’s truck. I turn around.

“We really have no problem with you… or with Adam,” she says. “Do you think the two of you could ever find it in your heart to forgive us?”

I ascend back up the walkway and up onto the porch.

“I wouldn’t hold my breath on that, Grandma,” I tell her honestly. “But you can hope for the best, right?”

She nods.

“This is probably going to be the last time you see me,” I tell my grandparents. “At least for a little while, anyway. Take care of yourselves, okay?”

“We will,” they chorus. “You take care of yourself too… and that boy.”

“I will,” I vow.

I hug both of them, knowing it could very well be for the last time. They are shocked momentarily, but embrace me as well.

When I break the hug, I see them look at me questioningly.

“I had to do that,” I say, responding to their silent question. “At least one more time.”

And with that, I hurry off the porch, down the walk and into my brother’s truck. The engine revs and we pull out of the driveway. As we leave the house behind us, I don’t dare to look back.

*************

I got the cast and boot off of my leg today, and Jude and I celebrated with an actual mall date this time. Even if this one was a little bit harder to get past Stef and Lena, given that they were under the impression that we had just been to the mall yesterday.

Neither Jude or I have any intention of ever telling them where we actually went. That is a secret that will stay between Eric and us.

We’re holding hands, when suddenly; we hear a voice call out.

“Jude?” The voice asks, as though the addressor isn’t entirely sure if they have the right person and has an apology on their tongue in case it has been a case of mistaken identity.

I feel Jude stiffen, and I’m immediately on-guard. The voice calls out again.

“Jude Jacob?” it asks, still unsure.

“No way,” Jude breathes, and turns around to face the mysterious voice.

I turn with him, spotting a 6 foot 5 inch figure, with red hair kept long but neat. He has tanned skin, is clean-shaven, and wears an eye patch over his right eye.

I see Jude’s face light up, but I’m still in the dark. ‘Who is this guy, and how does he know Jude?’

“Is that, you, Benji?” he asks, marveled as he takes in the older boy’s appearance.

“The one and only!” the guy—Benji—beams. “You look well, Jude. And you seem to have met someone. Good for you, kiddo!”

“Benji, this is my boyfriend, Connor Stevens,” Jude introduces me. “Babe, this is my ex-foster brother, Benji, that I told you and Eric about.”

“It’s nice to meet you,” I greet, politely. “Jude told me how you looked out for him. I owe you one.”

Benji waves it off.

“It was the right thing to do,” he tells me. “No one should be thanked for doing the right thing. Are you guys heading anywhere in particular?”

“We were actually just going to head to the food court for some lunch,” Jude announces. “If you want, you can come join us, and we could catch up.”

“I’d like that,” Benji agrees, smiling softly. “It’s been what, a year or two since I saw you last?”

“About that,” Jude nods in agreement. “I always wondered what happened after we left your house. Wondered if you, Callie and I would ever get back in touch.”

“Well, let’s get a table in the food court, and I’ll fill you both in, okay?” Benji asks.

Jude and I nod and follow our hulking companion through the corridors of the mall to the food court, getting a few glances from the other mall patrons, as they take stock of how small we are in comparison to our companion.

We stand in line and order food and drinks for ourselves, which Benji insists on paying for. Jude and I try to stop him, but he is handing the cashier the appropriate bills before we can make an effort to extract our respective wallets, so we sigh, and resign ourselves to the fact that the meal is Benji’s treat, and set about finding a table, while Benji waits for our food to be prepared.

We’re just sitting down when his huge frame towers over us, depositing a tray of food on the table, before he sits down himself.

“Thanks for the food, Benji,” Jude says, unwrapping his hamburger and taking a bite.

“You’re welcome, Jude!” he responds. “And you too, Connor.”

I’m surprised for a minute, but I recover and respond appropriately.

“Yes, thank you,” I say, unwrapping my own burger.

“So, Benji,” Jude says. “I’m sorry to bring this up, but there is just one thing I have to know right off the bat.”

“My eye, right?” He guesses.

“That’s right,” Jude says sheepishly. “I don’t want to be rude, but…”

“I understand, Jude,” Benji assures him. “It’s only natural that you’d be curious…” he trails off, inhaling and exhaling deeply, before he continues, getting a far off look in his eye as he unquestionably sinks into the memory.

“It was during a paintball match,” He begins. “I was out with my friends, and we were getting suited up in the necessary ensemble. One of my friends that was already finished getting ready was fooling around with his paintball gun. He fired a shot. I remember the sound of it. I looked up, and next thing I know, pain explodes throughout my eye, and I double over.”

“Ouch!” Jude winces. “That must have hurt.”

Benji fixes Jude with an incredulous look.

“Like a bitch,” he says seriously. “It was unlike any pain I’ve ever experienced. They rushed me to hospital afterwards, but the doctors couldn’t save my eye. So, I wear this.”

“I’m really sorry,” Jude says genuinely. “Connor knows how it feels to actually get shot, so he can probably understand better than I do.”

“Wait!” Benji exclaims, looking to me with wide eyes. “You got shot?”

“In the foot,” I confirm with a nod. “Only instead of a paintball, it was an actual bullet.”

“Shit!” Benji cringes. “I know how bad a paintball hurts, but an actual bullet? Damn, Jude, your boy is a tough one.”

“I know,” Jude acknowledges. “Still scared me half to death that night.”

“I bet,” Benji nods.

“Something good did come out of it, though,” I tell him. “Quite literally, in fact.”

Jude snorts. “Did you honestly just make that joke, Con?” he asks, before pecking me on the cheek. “You’re such a dork.”

“Am I missing something?” Benji asks, confused.

“I’m gay,” I tell him matter-of-factly. “Think about what I just said. Something good did come out of me getting shot…” I trail off, letting his brain make the connection.

The moment it does, his face lights up in understand and he starts chuckling loudly. “You came out?”

“Yeah,” I nod. “My homophobic father was hounding me, asking what kind of idiot sneaks out to break into someone’s house. He asked if I had done it to see my ex-girlfriend Daria and I finally snapped and told him that I snuck out to see Jude. The rest… just kind of came out unconsciously, until I finally told him that I was gay.”

“Good for you for finally standing up to him,” Benji comments. “I take it he’s either out of the picture, or he’s come around.”

“He’s come around,” I confirm. “He has a boyfriend himself.”

Benji’s eyes bulge from his head.

“What?” he questions.

“He has a boyfriend himself,” I repeat.

“How does one go from being homophobic to having a boyfriend?” Benji asks. “That just seems so bizarre.”

“It turns out that my father was sent to one of those places that tries to ‘cure’ you of being gay, as if you actually could. He told Jude, my brother, and I, some of the things those monsters did to him… It changed him. It broke him down. He just wasn’t the same person. Until very recently, that is.”

“Well, it’s really unfortunate that that happened to him,” Benji says after a long pause. “I wish him a full recovery.”

“Thank you,” I say sincerely. “We all certainly hope for the best. He’s made some incredible progress in such a short time.”

“That’s good to hear,” Benji smiles.

“Say, Benji?” Jude asks. “I’m curious. How are Colin and Charles these days?”

Benji darkens considerably, his smile falling off his face almost before Jude is done asking the question.

“Those two… psychopaths,” Benji growls. “Well, let’s just say that we no longer live with them.”

I look to Jude, who looks visibly shocked. “Are you okay, babe?”

He snaps out of his thoughts, and turns to me, nodding.

“Yeah, I was just surprised,” He assures me, before turning his attention to Benji. “Where are they now, if they don’t live with you and your parents?”

“Charles is in a mental institute upstate, and Colin is in juvenile detention,” Benji informs him.

“What?” Jude squeaks. “I mean, I always knew they were creepy, but how did they get themselves there?”

“Charles was diagnosed with schizophrenia, and Colin was caught trying to put some stuff into the food of our new foster sibling.”

Jude pales. “Oh, my God. That’s terrible!”

Benji just nods.

“That’s enough about those two, though,” Benji says with finality, before fixing Jude with a kind smile. “I want to know about you. How are you doing? And Callie?”

“We’re both doing really well,” Jude tells him. “I got adopted by two wonderful Moms, and Callie in the process of getting adopted.”

“That’s wonderful,” Benji says sincerely. “I always wondered about how you two ended up.”

“Yeah, Callie got shipped to Juvie by one of our other foster fathers, actually.”

“For what?” Benji inquires.

“She was protecting me,” Jude says. “I had tried on one of my foster father’s ex-wife’s dresses, and he walked in and caught me. He started beating the crap out of me. She took a baseball bat to the windshield of his precious car. The police wouldn’t listen when the two of us said she had been protecting me. She got shipped to Juvie, and ended up at the Adams-Foster residence. She and my eldest adoptive brother, Brandon, came and rescued me from where I was staying. My foster father had a gun pulled on both of them before Mom, and Brandon’s father Mike, came in with their guns drawn and arrested him.”

“Sounds intense,” Benji muses.

“It was,” Jude confirms.

“Your family sounds interesting. Who else is there?”

“Well, there are my Moms, Stef and Lena. Stef is a cop, and Lena is the Vice-Principal at our school. They’re married. Then there is Brandon and Callie, Jesus and Mariana and myself. Brandon’s father Mike is like a father figure to all of us. He and Stef were married before Stef met Lena. In our extended family, we have Stef’s mother Sharon, and Lena’s parents Stuart and Dana.”

The two of us look over to Benji to see him, mouth agate and eyes wide.

“Holy smokes, Jude!” He says. “You have a huge family now.”

“Yeah,” Jude nods. “They’re really great. Maybe you can meet them someday. Come over for dinner or something?”

“I’d like that,” Benji nods. “Can I ask why Callie hasn’t been adopted yet? I mean, you two are brother and sister, right?”

“Yes,” Jude confirms. “But we found out that she is technically just my half-sister. She has a different father, but we share a mother.”

“Wow!” Benji whistles. “I did not see that coming.”

“Trust me,” I interject. “Stef, Lena and I didn’t either. And then, we find out that her bio dad has another kid. So technically, Callie has two half-siblings.”

“That’s crazy!”

“Tell me about it,” I interject. “I have a hard time keeping track of everyone’s relation to everyone in that house as it is. Drama always seems to find them, too.”

“And who was most of my drama centered around, huh Con?” Jude deadpans.

I decide at this time to find the table an interesting specimen to view, and direct my gaze to anywhere other than Jude.

“We’re waiting, Con…” Jude teases.

“Fine!” I huff. “I was. I was just stating a fact though, babe. Besides, you know how much I love your family.”

“I know!” Jude says sweetly, and he presses a kiss into my cheek, which causes me to blush a deep shade of crimson.

Benji looks between us.

“God,” He groans good-naturedly. “You two act like an old married couple! Very domestic, if I say so myself.”

This remark causes Jude to blush as well, and Benji laughs.

“You are so not helping your case,” he says through the laughter. “How on Earth did you find each other?”

“Connor bowled me over,” Jude says simply.

Benji nearly chokes as he struggles to hold back a laugh.

“What?” he questions.

I sigh. “It happened like this…”

_*Flashback*_

_Connor was rushing to get to his next class. He slams his locker shut and begins to jog to his destination. The only thought running through his head is that he doesn’t want to be late and risk the wrath of his teacher… or his father, should, God forbid, Adam Stevens ever find out._

_He hasn’t made it but a few feet when his weight makes a solid impact with another student, sending them sprawling to the floor._

_“Sorry,” Connor says sincerely. He looks down to see his latest speed-induced casualty, only to be met with a pair of the most piercing hazel eyes he has ever seen._

_“It’s okay,” A voice says, and it takes a minute for Connor to snap out of his reverie to notice that the kid he bowled over is actually speaking to him._

_“Let me help you up,” Connor offers, extending his hand, which is immediately taken as he hauls the poor kid up._

_It is while helping to dust the kid off that Connor gets a good look at him for the first time. A brown bowl cut frames his forehead, matching his hazel eyes. He’s timid, meek._

_‘And cute’ Connor finds himself thinking, before shaking the thought away._

_“Hi, I’m Connor. Connor Stevens,” He introduces himself. “I haven’t seen you around before. Are you new?”_

_The boy nods._

_“What’s your name?” Connor questions._

_The kid looks up at him tentatively._

_“Jude,” He breathes out finally. “Jude Jacob, and yes, I’m new here. Would you happen to know where this class is?”_

_The kid—Jude—shoves his class schedule into Connor’s hands. Connor glances at it, before nodding._

_“I have that class as well,” He says. “I’ll take you.”_

_“Thanks… Connor,” Jude says gratefully._

_“You’re welcome, Jude,” Connor replies._

_The two of them set off to the class together, walking side-by-side._

_*End Flashback*_

“Wow,” Benji says, as I finish telling the story of how Jude and I first came into each other’s lives. I gained a best friend, a boyfriend and a crazy surrogate family, all because I knocked over one Jude Jacob Adams-Foster on his first day at Anchor Beach.

If that doesn’t make me the luckiest guy on the planet, I don’t know what does.

“And it gets even better,” Jude informs his ex-foster brother, snapping me from my reverie. “And a heck of a lot more dramatic, too.”

“Oh!” Benji exclaims. “Do tell, Jude.”

“Well, Connor and I were friends from that point on. He and his dad took me to the batting cages with them, wherein I patted Connor on the back,” Jude begins.

“Okay?” Benji ventures nervously.

Jude gives a small smile. “His dad saw me do it. The next tine I asked Connor if he wanted to spend the night at my place, he told me that his dad wouldn’t let him because he thought I was gay.”

“He did not,” Benji seethes.

“Trust me, he did,” I say seriously. “I tried to tell Jude that my dad didn’t need to know about our friendship, and Jude practically handed me my ass. Went off on this whole anti-label tangent and said that he didn’t want to be anybody’s secret.”

“So, what did you do?” Benji inquires.

“I snuck out to a party at Jude’s house and lied to him about standing up to my dad. My Dad showed up at Jude’s.”

“Oh, shit!”

“Yeah,” I nod. “That about sums it up. Jude and I… we weren’t on speaking terms for a long while. In fact, if I recall right, Jude wasn’t speaking at all.”

“How do you mean?” Benji asks, eying Jude.

“It’s called selective mutism,” Jude informs him. “It was my body’s way of coping with everything.”

“Oh, I see,” Benji says, with a nod. “So how long were you two on the outs?”

“For a while,” Jude acknowledges. “I wasn’t letting him off the hook that easy.”

“And don’t I know it…” I mumble sourly.

“Hey, babe,” Jude coos, wrapping his arms around my neck and pecking me on the cheek. “Don’t be like that, okay? It all worked out in the end.”

“It did,” I agree.

“So, what happened?” Benji asks. “Don’t leave me hanging here.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Jude assures him. “We had a 7th grade camping trip. Connor and I were assigned to a tent together.”

“That must have been awkward,” Benji comments.

“Oh, believe me,” I tell him. “It was. I would try to talk to Jude and he’d just sit there and pretend he didn’t hear me. It wasn’t until the last night that I finally wore him down, and did something that changed the dynamic of our relationship forever.”

“Let me guess!” Benji exclaims. “You kissed him?”

The unmistakable blush coloring both of our cheeks gives it away. I sling my arm around Jude, who burrows into my side.

“Yeah,” I verbalize. “I could just feel that I was going to lose him. I was going to lose my best friend, and I was hit by the realization that I didn’t want to lose him, in any capacity. I leaned in, and he did too. The rest is history.”

“There was also the movie theatre, and the mixed messages on the sleepover, and the other kiss, and our hospital room conversation…” Jude announces, ticking each off on his fingers.

“Yes, yes, Jude, I know,” I assure him, kissing his temple.

“Sounds like you two have had quite the journey,” Benji remarks, looking at us with barely concealed awe. “Most of the stuff you two have survived would’ve torn apart most adult couples…”

I link our fingers together.

“We’re lucky,” I admit. “But I wouldn’t change anything.”

I feel Jude nod into my shoulder.

A cheeky grin spreads across Benji’s face. “Not even getting shot in the foot?”

I shake my head. “Things worked out in the end. Everything happens for a reason.”

“That’s very true,” Benji nods, looking down at his watch. “I have to go now, but we’ll keep in touch, okay Jude?”

“Absolutely!” Jude confirms.

“I look forward to that dinner,” he continues. “Say hello to Callie for me, okay?”

“Will do,” Jude nods.

Benji pulls a napkin towards him and writes on it, before pushing it toward Jude. “Here’s my cell phone number.”

Jude inputs the number into his contacts, and sends a quick message.

“There!” he says, looking up from the keypad. “Now you have mine, too.”

“Great!” Benji exclaims. “It was really nice to catch up. We’ll talk soon, okay? Congratulations on your relationship, you two.”

“Thanks,” we chorus.

“And, Connor, I wish your Dad the best, okay?”

I nod. “Thanks, Benji.”

With that, the hulking teenager is gone. I turn my attention back to Jude.

“Well, that was completely unexpected,” He says.

“Yeah,” I agree. “What were the actual odds of you seeing each other again?”

“Very slim,” Jude admits, before looking up at me. “You’re not jealous of him, are you?”

My eyebrows arch.

“Do I have a reason to be?” I question.

“No!” Jude says emphatically. “There’s only you, Con.”

“Good,” I say, giving him a quick peck. “Now feed me a fry.”

*******************

The next day, Jude and I walk side-by-side into Anchor Beach, joined by our hands. My locker is next to Evan’s with Jude’s across the hall on the other side. As we arrive, I see Evan standing there, gripping his backpack tightly, and looking around nervously, as if searching for any imminent threats.

I fix Jude with a concerned look, which I see reflected right back to me. I give Jude a quick peck on the cheek, and make my way over.

Evan doesn’t even notice me coming, focused on opening his locker.

“Hey, Evan,” I say casually.

Evan nearly jumps out of his skin at the sound of my voice. It’s now that I know for certain that something is going on.

“Hey Connor,” He says, emotionless.

“Is everything okay?” I venture.

“Fine,” He says, before slamming his locker shut. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

“But there is something to talk about, right?” I ask, seeking some kind of confirmation.

“I SAID I DON’T WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT!” he thunders, storming off, leaving me stunned. I’ve never seen Evan act like this before.

I see Jimmy and Michael come up to fetch their books. Michael’s locker is beside Evan’s and Jimmy’s is on the other side of mine.

“Hey guys,” I say.

“Hey, Connor,” They respond in unison.

“Do you know if anything is going on with Evan?” I question, deciding to just come right out with it.

Both of them look at me, silently asking me to elaborate.

“He was acting anxious when Jude and I arrived earlier. It wasn’t like him.”

“Well, I don’t know why,” Michael says.

“Me neither,” Jimmy adds, shaking his head.

I look at both of them quizzically, searching for any signs of deception, before nodding. “Okay, then.”

“Do you think there is something going on with Evan?” Michael asks.

“Yes, I do,” I say seriously.

The bell rings, signaling that we must get to first period. Throughout my entire first lesson, I’m unable to get Evan’s anxious face out of my mind.

I know something is up with him, and I intend to find out what it is.

**************

“Hey, babe,” I say, dropping my chin on Jude’s shoulder as my arms snake around his middle.

“Hey, Con,” He says.

“You remember how Evan was acting earlier, right?” I ask.

“As if I’d forget that,” He deadpans. “That was really out of character.”

“Tell me about it,” I agree with a nod.

“Do you think he’s okay?”

I shake my head.

“I know that he’s not. But, at the same time, I don’t know how to go about getting him to talk to me about it, much less how to help him. What do you think I should do?”

“Well this isn’t something that can be ignored,” Jude says sagely. “You have gym class with him before lunch, remember?”

I had totally forgotten, but find myself nodding.

“My suggestion would be to try and catch him in the locker room afterwards and talk about it then.”

“Good idea, babe,” I praise, pressing a kiss into his cheek.

The warning bell goes off, and I reluctantly disentangle myself from Jude.

Jude turns around and cups my cheek with his hand.

“You’re doing the right thing, okay?” He reassures me.

“I know,” I nod.

“I’ll see you at lunch, Con.”

“Wouldn’t miss it,” I confirm. “Although I might be slightly late, dealing with the Evan situation.”

“That’s fine.” He assures me. “I can wait. I’ll sit with Taylor and Daria until you get there.”

“Sounds good,” I agree. “I’ll try not to take too long, but I really have to get to class right now.”

“Go on, then!” Jude says. “Learn something.”

“No promises!” I laugh, and the two of us part, going off in separate directions.

*************

Second period I couldn’t focus, and throughout gym, I was a nervous wreck. I’m waiting behind a partition in the locker room, and once I’m sure that the last person aside from Evan and I has left, I move to make my presence known, rounding the partition back into the changing area once more.

“Hey, Evan,” I call.

Evan startles, but turns to face me.

“Did you forget something, Connor?” He asks.

I shake my head.

“I came to talk to you.”

“I don’t have time to talk, Connor,” He huffs, moving to exit.

I move my foot to block the rest of the space between the partition and the wall.

“Well you’re going to make time,” I snap. “I’ve been worried about you.”

And now that I’m getting my first good look at him, my worry has increased substantially. He’s wearing dirty clothes, and looks exhausted, with dark bags under his bloodshot eyes. He’s wincing from struggling to get around me. Looking down his body, I see a dot of red, staining his white t-shirt, peeking out of his unzipped hoodie.

“Just move aside, Connor,” He pleads. “I’m fine. It’s nothing.”

“It’s not nothing!” I yell, causing him to flinch. I soften my tone, my posture and my face before I next speak. “I know you too well Evan. I know something is wrong. There is blood staining your t-shirt, and you look like hell.”

“That is a ketchup stain,” He reasons weakly.

“I think I know blood when I see it,” I deadpan. “Please, just tell me what’s going on.”

The last bit of Evan’s resolve gives out and he crumbles into my arms, sobbing.

“I’m so sorry,” He says, repeating it over and over.

I lead him to a bench in the change room, and sit him down. I take a seat next to him, and wrap my arms around his shaking frame.

“Don’t apologize, okay?” I tell him. “I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere. I want to help you.”

Evan continues crying into my shoulder.

“But in order for me to do that, I need you to tell me what happened.”

Evan stiffens, but I feel an almost imperceptible nod. He sighs, and draws back from my embrace, sniffling and wiping his eyes.

“I came out,” He says quietly. “My dad didn’t take it well. He called me every name in the book, and started beating me. My mom tried to step in, but he hit her as well. I got out of the house as quickly as humanly possible. My backpack was by the door, so I just grabbed it and ran for my life.”

“When did it happen?” I ask.

“Friday night,” He quivers, obviously mid-memory. “I brought it up during dinner. It was silent for a minute, but then it all went to hell.”

I nod in understanding.

“Where have you been staying?”

He looks at me, slightly fearful.

“I haven’t really been staying anywhere,” He reveals. “I slept on a park bench on Friday and Saturday, and then on Sunday, I picked the lock for the front door here and slept in the nurse’s office.”

“Are you kidding me?” I bluster. “Why didn’t you think to come to me? You wouldn’t have been turned away. You could’ve gone to Jimmy or Michael, too. Hell, you could even have gone to Jude. His moms are foster parents, and Stef is a cop, too. She would’ve been able to help you.”

“I didn’t want to ask her,” Evan admits. “I was so scared that going to the police would mean that I’d be put in foster care. I’ve heard horror stories about that, and I’m guessing you have too. Jude is your boyfriend, after all.”

I nod in the affirmative.

“He has told me a lot of what went on in the 7 years he was in the system, yes.”

“I… I just knew I wouldn’t be able to take it,” he tells me. “I wouldn’t be able to survive like Jude did.”

“I’ll figure something out, okay?” I assure my friend. “You just go to class or to lunch, depending on your schedule, and I’ll meet you out front of the school with Jude at the end of the day, okay?”

Evan gives me a grateful look and nods.

“Thanks, Connor,” He breathes out, finally sounding relieved instead of fearful and tense. “For everything. You’re a great friend.”

“Any time,” I nod. I move to stand up. “Now, if you excuse me, Jude is waiting for me in the cafeteria. Remember, meet us out front of the school at the end of the day.”

Evan nods and gathers up his backpack, slinging it over his shoulder, and walking around the partition. It isn’t until I hear the big wooden door slam shut that I pull out my phone, and dial a number.

“Hello?” Stef’s voice asks.

“Stef, it’s Connor,” I announce.

“Connor, love!” She exclaims, and I can hear her smile on the other end of the line. “Is everything okay?”

“Not really, no,” I admit.

“Is Jude alright?” She asks, voice suddenly inflected with a palpable amount of concern.

“He’s fine,” I assure her, hearing her exhale in relief.

“What can I do for you, then, love?” she questions.

“It’s my friend, Evan,” I tell her. “He needs help. I need to know what his options are in that regard.”

“It depends on the situation,” she tells me. “What do you know?”

I give her an account of Evan’s earlier behavior and of our conversation.

“You did a good thing, love,” She assures me. “Thank you for calling me. I’ll get in contact with Evan’s mother and make sure she’s okay. You and Jude can bring him by the house after school, okay?”

“Will do,” I tell her. “Although, Stef?”

“Yes, love?” she responds.

“You may want to get out of your uniform before we arrive.”

“Why is that?”

I tell her about how Evan didn’t want to go to Jude because Stef was a cop, and he thought she would put him in foster care.

“Why is it that everyone is afraid of the police?” She huffs, more so to herself than to me.

I laugh on my end of the line.

“Sorry, love,” She apologizes. “Got lost in my head there. I’ll be sure to take off my uniform, then.”

“Thanks, Stef,” I say. “I’ll see you later.”

“Bye, love,” she says.

I end the conversation, gather my bag, and make my way to the cafeteria, where Jude is waiting.

*****************

At the end of the day, Jude and I meet Evan at the entrance to Anchor Beach, as agreed. We begin the walk to Jude’s house.

“Why are we here?” Evan asks warily.

“Just trust us, okay?” I ask him. “Can you do that?”

He nods, and the three of us march up to the front door, which Jude opens with his house key.

“I’m home!” He calls.

We hear Stef’s voice call back. “In the kitchen!”

I feel, rather than see, Evan tense behind me. I look back at him, “It’s okay,” I mouth, flashing him a reassuring smile.

He nods stiffly, and I take Jude’s hand in mine as we make our way to our destination.

Upon our entrance, I see Stef and a woman that I recognize as Evan’s mother sitting at the island with mugs in hand. Stef is out of her police uniform, obviously having heeded my advice to do so.

“Hey,” Jude greets, getting their attention.

Stef looks to us with a warm smile.

“Jude. Connor,” she says. “Welcome home to both of you.” She looks to Evan. “And you must be Evan,” she greets. “It’s nice to meet you, I’m Stef, one of Jude’s moms.”

Evan shakes her hand, looking bewildered at the greeting, but acting polite nonetheless.

“Thank you ma’am,” he says. “It’s nice to meet you as well.”

Stef laughs at his formality.

“I’m not in uniform, you know,” She teases. “You don’t have to be so formal. But I do believe that someone whom you know quite well is sitting across from me, and she’s very anxious to talk to you.”

Evan looks across at his mother, and his eyes widen.

“Mom?” He asks, incredulously.

She simply nods, hand over her mouth and tears cutting streaks down her face.

Evan looks to Jude and I, then to Stef, and finally back at his mother.

“But how?”

“Mrs. Adams-Foster called me,” Evan’s mother explains. “She said that she knew what had happened on Friday night, and that you had told Connor. She asked if I would be able to come to her home, and now I’m here, and so are you.”

She opens her arms wide. Evan looks back at me.

“Go on,” I smile.

With calm, stiff steps, he walks forward.

“What about Dad?” He asks his mother.

“I threw him out,” she says. “He said I had to make a choice between him or you, and I chose you. I’ll always choose you. To be honest, I was planning to divorce him anyway.”

“Good,” Evan smiles, and the last of the tension leaves his body. He rushes to hug his mother, and Jude and I take that as our cue to leave.

We make our way up to his bedroom, and I throw myself on the bed with a sigh.

“You did the right thing, Con,” Jude tells me. “I’m proud of you.”

“Thanks, Jude,” I reply. “But when did our lives become such a bad soap opera?”

“I don’t know, Con,” He answers, and I feel the bed sink as he lays out on it as well. “I just can’t believe how much of a whirlwind the past few days have been.”

I lock eyes with my boyfriend.

“Thank you, Jude,” I say sincerely.

“For what, Con?” he asks, a single eyebrow arching in question.

“For not running at the first sign of trouble,” I admit.

Jude scoffs.

“Babe,” He says. “I hate to tell you this, but you’re kind of stuck with me.”

I put my arm around him and he burrows into my body.

“I could think of worse things than being stuck with you, my dear Judicorn,” I tell him honestly.

“Good,” He says happily. “Just one thing though…”

“Anything,” I nod.

“STOP USING THAT DAMN NICKNAME!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, a lot happened in this chapter. It is the longest chapter I've written in my four years as a writer. I hope you enjoyed it. Please leave comments and give kudos and tell me how I did.
> 
> Until next time,  
> WritingIsLoveAndLife
> 
> ********
> 
> I'm happy to know I left this story in capable hands.  
> -NukeRose


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AN: Ladies and gentlemen, if any are actually still reading this story, a new chapter finally arrives and I'm glad to be back. Special thanks to my good friend, WritingIsLoveAndLife, for writing the previous chapter for me. You did a great fucking job, bro, continuing it for me while I was too fucked up with grief to write or think straight. You're a true friend and I look forward to working with you more in the future.
> 
> A thank you to everybody who has wished me condolences. A thank you to all who have commented on my stories left kudos on them on A03.
> 
> -NukeRose.

It has been a couple of months since the incident with Evan.

It's November 18th, 2014. Today is the day that Jude turns fourteen years old, and the party is starting. All of the guests but Eric have arrived, and Jude and I greet Benjji, who was more than happy to attend. Benjji greets Jude exuberantly, grabbing him and lifting him off his feet in a hug. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Stef and Lena watching in confusion. Benjji deposits Jude next to me, and turns to me with a mischievous grin. I barely have time to brace myself before I too am lifted off my feet. Stef and Lena start laughing.

"Okay, Shrek, you can put me down now." I jokingly tell Benjji, "You'll make Jude jealous."

"Aw, you're no fun." Benjji responds with a pout and plops me back on my feet.

Jude notices that Stef and Lena are approaching us.

"Hey Moms." Jude said.

"Hey honey," Lena says, "Who's this?"

"Oh, this is Benjji." Jude introduces, "He was my foster brother in one of our old homes. He kept Callie and me safe, kept us from getting hurt. He protected us."

"Oh, well it's great to meet you, Benjji." Stef says, shaking his hand with a smile, "I'm Stef, and this is my wife Lena."

"It's great to meet you both." Benjji said, "I'm glad to see that Jude and Callie found a good home. If anybody deserves it, they do."

"Well, anybody who protected them is always welcome." Lena said, "Don't be a stranger."

"So, how have things been going?" Jude asked Benjji as his Moms walked away.

"Good." Benjji responded, "Been busy lately with work and my cover band."

"Cover band?" Jude asked.

"Yeah. Me and a few of my friends formed a little group." Benjji says casually, "We don't know how to play much, and we aren't very good. We only do it for fun."

"What kind of stuff do you guys play?" I asked.

"Right now, it's mostly Aerosmith covers." Benjji said.

"I love Aerosmith!" Jude exclaims, "Livin' On The Edge is one of my favorite songs."

That whole sentence was a bit of an understatement. Aerosmith was Jude's favorite band by a mile. My birthday gift for him was their best albums: _Toys In The Attic, Rocks, Permanent Vacation, Pump, Get A Grip, Nine Lives,_ and _Just Push Play_. I'd even gone out and bought them all brand new, instead of giving him a couple of new ones and the older copies that I had.

The two strike up a conversation about music, which I tune out. Instead of listening, I just look at Jude, and marvel at how much he's changed over the past few months.

Time has definitely been kind to Jude Adams Foster. He has grown several inches, and he is now taller than me by three inches. True to my promise, he started working out with me and Eric every chance he had available, and he had put on a considerable amount of muscle tone. Any baby fat that remained on his face was now gone, giving his face sharper features, and making him look more handsome and grown up instead of cute. Not that I didn't still find him adorable, because I do. He had let his hair grow out a little, as well, and now it was just long enough to cover his ears and curl at the ends.

My musings were interrupted by a shout.

"JUDE! CONNOR!"

We turn to see Eric striding across the yard.

"Well, look who decided to join us… finally." I snarked.

"Hey, unlike some people, I am a busy man, little brother." Eric sassed, "I have a job that keeps me very… busy."

It was at that moment that Eric's eyes landed on Benjji, and Eric trailed off as he observed him.

"Sup? I'm Benjji. You must be Eric?" Benjji said with a small smile, offering a hand to shake.

Eric stared for a second longer before shaking his head clear and accepting the handshake.

"Um, yeah. Good to meet you, too." Eric said, "Connor mentioned you once. Thanks for taking care of Jude when you did."

"Yeah, of course." Benjji said.

The two of them still hadn't release the others hand, and they were both staring at each other.

Jude and I simultaneously looked at each other, and both of our brows were furrowed in confusion.

"So, uh what have I missed?" Eric asked, turning to me and finally releasing Benjji's hand.

"Benjji was just talking to Jude and I about his cover band he formed." I answered.

"Oh, that's cool." Eric said with a small smile.

"I was going to tell them," Benjji continues, "They're welcome to come see us play sometime. You're welcome to come too…"

"That'd be great. Yeah." Eric said quickly. Too quickly to be casual.

Jude and I's eyebrows shot up, and we shared another look.

"Always wanted to try something like that…" Eric said.

"Yeah, but you sing like choking hyena." I joked.

Jude poked me in the side, right in my ticklish spot. I jumped with a high-pitched squeak and whirled around after Jude, who had already taken off across the yard.

"YOU'LL PAY FOR THAT, FOSTER!" I screamed after him.

"COME AND GET ME STEVENS!" Jude challenged.

So, I gave chase.

It was a short chase, which involved Jude and I weaving through everybody at the party. It ended with Jude hiding behind Brandon, who was laughing hysterically at our antics. Brandon made a very ineffective shield however, and he did nothing to stop me from tackling Jude to the ground.

Revenge was sweet indeed, and soon Jude was writhing around under me, desperate to escape as my fingers dancing across his sides became instruments of torture as he fell to my ticklish assault.

"OKAY! OKAY I SURRENDER!" Jude guffawed, "I SURRENDER!"

"BEG FOR MERCY!" I cackled as I continued my assault.

"MERCY! PLEASE, MERCY?" Jude begged, his face turning red from his laughter.

I ceased my assault, keeping him pinned to the ground.

"You're so mean to me." Jude teased.

"Hey, you poked me." I shot back, "That's a declaration of war."

I dismounted and pulled him to his feet. Jude turns around, and I see that he has grass stains on the back of his shirt.

"Oh crap." I said, "You got stains on your shirt, Jude."

"Hey, it's not my fault!" He protested as he pulled me into the house towards the stairs, "You're the one who thought it was a fabulous idea to tackle me to the ground."

I blew a raspberry in his direction, and he looked at me unimpressed.

"Goofball." He mumbled under his breath as we ascended the stairs and entered his room.

He opened his closet and started digging for a new shirt, first pulling his stained one off and throwing it on his bed.

"Hey, can I ask you something?" I asked.

"Sure, what's up?

"Was Eric acting funny, or is it just me?" I asked.

"Oh good, I was wondering if you noticed or not." Jude said, turning to me with a shirt in hand.

I took a second to let my eyes rove over Jude's exposed skin, allowing myself a small smirk.

"Connor, put your eyeballs back in your head." Jude deadpanned.

"What? You can't be shirtless and expect me not to look." I teased, making him turn red, "Anyway… what do you think it was about? I've never seen Eric act like that."

"You sure you want me to answer that?" Jude asked, sliding the shirt on. He had worn the same green shirt when I kissed him for the second time, except now it was much tighter.

"Jude, I know what you're thinking…"

"Is it so hard to believe?" Jude argued, "I know he doesn't act like it, but your brother is human. He talks funny, and he's serious all time, but he is a human being. You can't tell me you didn't see the way he was looking at him. And the way he jumped on the invitation to watch Benjji's band play? Connor, it's almost painfully obvious."

"I know it is." I agree, "But don't you think Eric is a bit too… old, for him?"

"What are you talking about?"

"Jude, Benjji is twenty." I remind him, "My brother is thirty. That's a ten-year age difference. In my family, that gap is considered iffy at best, inappropriate at worst. The rules in my family with ages was always to take your age, cut it in half, and then add seven to the number. That number is the youngest you should date. Going by that, Benjji is two years too young."

"Connor, my dad was eleven years older than my mom." Jude revealed, "Love is blind. It doesn't care about age, gender, nationality, race, or creed. If it's there, if there's chemistry, than it should be nurtured. Your brother has been alone for a long time. If there's any chance, he should take it."

"I guess." I concede, "And we know it's at least a little mutual, because Benjji was giving Eric the same look. If they can get past how awkward Eric is. I always thought Eric would be smoother than that."

"I know. It was cringe worthy." Jude said, "Come on, we gotta get back to the party before they come looking for us."

I agreed, and we descended the stairs. Jude and I were both aware that the only reason Stef and Lena were so lenient on our spending time alone together was that we behaved ourselves and never gave them a reason to be more strict. We were allowed to share a bed, but the door had to remain open at ALL times, without exception. It was more than fair. They've caught us making out a couple of times, but apart from telling Jude and I not to get too carried away they haven't done much.

We returned to the backyard, when…

"Jude?" A voice to our left asked.

Jude froze in spot, his eyes widening to comical size. We turned to see who was addressing him.

The man was tall and balding, and what little hair he had left on his head was greying. The lines on his face told a story of stress and exhaustion. After a second, I realized that his face resembled Jude's somewhat. The small smile on the man's face was one that I had seen on Jude's face on numerous occasions. I looked at Jude, and I noticed that he was shaking slightly. He stepped forward slowly.

"Wow. Look at you." The man said softly with a small crooked smile, "You've grown up so much."

"You're actually here." Jude said, his tone one of slight disbelief, "I… I wasn't sure you'd come."

I was confused.

"Of course I came." The man said, "I'm surprised you invited me."

Jude rushed forward and threw his arms around the man, burying his head in his shoulder.

"It's good to see you, Dad." Jude mumbled tearily.

Oh.

I probably looked like an idiot, staring at the pair of them with wide eyes.

Jude had told me about his father before, but I had never even seen a picture before, much less met Donald Jacob in person. I never had any idea what to expect. I knew that he had once been in prison. I guess I expected him to be far more intimidating. Instead, he looks kind, tired, and from the way he's holding Jude closely, caring.

It suddenly struck me how important this was, how big of a deal this was. As far as I knew, this was the first time father and son had seen each other in a very long time. I couldn't help the small smile that came over my face.

After embracing for a full three minutes, they separated and Jude turned back to me.

He hesitated before introducing me.

"Dad, this is my… my best friend, Connor Stevens." Jude introduced.

Donald extended his hand to me, and I shook it respectfully, hiding the feeling of hurt that I felt at being introduced as I was.

"Nice to meet you, sir." I said politely, "If you'll excuse me for a minute?"

I didn't wait for a response, before I turned and fled back towards the house.

I ended up sitting on the swing on the front porch. I sat there for a few minutes, just staring at my hands.

"Hey."

I looked up to see Jude standing there, looking nervous.

"Hey." I said.

"You alright?" He asked.

"Why didn't you tell your dad?" I asked, "That we were boyfriends?"

Jude bit his lip, and looked at his feet.

"Are you ashamed of me or something?"

Jude met my gaze, an alarmed glare plastered across his features.

"What? No! I'm not ashamed of you!" Jude sputtered indignantly, "How could you even think that?"

"Then why, Jude?" I asked.

"Connor… I don't know how he would react." Jude explained, "The last time I saw him was the day he signed away his parental rights. That was like… six or seven months ago."

"Jude…"

"You have a dad, Connor." Jude continued, "You two may have your problems, but you and Adam are getting better, and you see each other all the time. I'm not that lucky. My dad barely knows me. I barely know him. This is only the second time I've seen him since I was six years old. Literally twice in eight years. He's the only biological family I have left besides Callie. I miss him, and… and I don't want to give him a reason to split when he's only just come back. And I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings, but…"

"Jude…" I interrupt, feeling guilty, "I get it. I understand."

"Jude…"

We turn to see Callie standing in the doorway.

"Jude, if Donald can't accept you for who you are, then he isn't worth spending time with." Callie said bluntly, "If he doesn't love you enough to accept your relationship with Connor, then he doesn't deserve it."

"Doesn't make the thought hurt any less." Jude croaked, getting upset.

Callie moved forward and hugged him before I could even twitch.

"I know, buddy." She said, "But you gotta ask yourself whether you'd be happier hiding it or being open about it."

"You're not wrong." Jude conceded a moment later when released from the embrace.

"You don't have to do it if you don't want to, Jude." I assured him.

"No, you're both right." Jude argued, "I shouldn't be ashamed or afraid. I shouldn't hide. All hiding has ever done has made me miserable."

He grabbed me by the hand and dragged me back through the house, his face determined as we reentered the backyard and approached Donald, who was speaking to Stef and Lena.

"Hey, can we talk to you inside for a minute?" Jude asked him, "It's important."

"Yeah, sure. Lead the way, boys." Donald said.

We led him inside, and into the living room. He sat down, but Jude and I remained standing.

"What is it you wanted to talk about, Jude?" Donald asked, concerned, "You look pale. You feeling alright?"

"Y-Yeah." Jude said, swallowing passed the lump in his throat. "I wasn't entirely honest before… when I introduced Connor."

Donald looked confused.

"What do you mean, Jude?"

"He's not my best f-friend…" Jude mumbled nervously, "He's m-my b-boyfriend. I'm… I'm g-gay, dad."

Donald didn't look surprised.

"Um, I kind of figured that." He said, confirming my thoughts.

"Wait, what?" Jude stammered.

"Well, he bolted after you introduced him as your friend." Donald explained, "And he looked like he'd had his feelings hurt. And there was the way you got immediately got all worried and bolted after him. Plus you two were holding hands before I called out to you. Kind of makes it obvious."

"…" Jude gaped, "Oh…"

"I just don't get why you lied about it." Donald finished.

"Well… I didn't want you to get mad at me for it." Jude explained sadly, "I didn't want to give you a reason to l-leave me again. This is the second time I've seen you since I went into foster care. I… I m-miss you, D-Dad, and I don't want you to hate me or be ashamed of me and walk away again…"

Donald's composure crumbles, and he stands quickly. He wraps Jude in a tight embrace as Jude starts crying.

"I'm so s-sorry Jude." He whispered into Jude's hair, placing a kiss to the top of his head, "I've let you down so many times… All the damage I've caused."

After a moment, he pulled away and knelt in front of Jude.

"I want you to listen to me very carefully." Donald said softly, "I could _never_ be ashamed of you. Ever. I have never been more proud of anybody than I am of you and your sister. You survived so much bullshit, and you never let it break you. You are so much like your mother. You're kind, caring, and you are so _brave_ , Jude. I'm lucky you still want me in your life. When I got the email from you, inviting me to this? I thought I was hallucinating. I couldn't believe my eyes. How can you be so forgiving? All the pain you've suffered because of my drunken mistake, but you still invited me today. You have no idea how proud I am to be your dad. I don't care if you're gay, bi, straight, or transgender. You're my son. You're still the same boy that I cried when I held you for the first time, fourteen years ago today. All I've ever wanted was for you to be happy. For you to be as proud of who you are as I am. You deserve that. You deserve to be proud of who you are, and who you're with."

"Y-You really don't c-care?" Jude whimpered tearfully.

"Really, Jude." Donald said, smiling softly, "I love you, son. Nothing's gonna change that."

Jude lunged forward, grabbing his father tightly, sobbing happily into his chest. I couldn't help but let a few tears of my own fall.

************

The party continued until the evening, with Jude regaling Donald with all the details of how we got together. He was so happy to have his dad back. When Donald had to take his leave, he promised Jude to stay in touch, giving Jude his phone number and telling us that if either of us ever needed anything to call him.

When the party finally ended, Jude and I bid goodnight to the rest of the family and headed upstairs. We entered the bedroom, and took turns changing into our pajamas. As soon as he came out of the bathroom, he pulled me into a hug, burying his head in my shoulder.

"You okay?" I asked.

"Long day." Jude said softly, pulling away and leaning in and pressing a soft kiss to my lips before continuing, "I can't remember a day where I've been happier."

"I'm glad."

Jude pulled back and we stared into each other's eyes. Jude's eyes were soft, glittering with unshed tears.

"You okay?" I asked.

"Yeah, just… I want to tell you something." He said gently.

"What is it, babe?" I asked softly, and he flushed slightly at the pet name that I didn't use very often.

"I was thinking, about what my dad said." He said, "About being proud of myself, and about being proud of who I am, and who I'm with."

"Yeah?"

"He was right." Jude said with a small smile, "I should be proud. Because I have a reason to be proud. You and me, we have every reason to be proud, and we shouldn't have to feel like we should hide it. So we aren't. I know I was nervous about being completely open about our relationship in public, but I don't care anymore. I wanna hold your hand in public, and hug you and kiss you between classes at school, and show you off at every chance I get, because I deserve to show off the fact that I have the most wonderful boyfriend I could ever hope to have, and that I-I l-love him so much that it almost hurts to be apart from him."

My eyes widened, and my breath fled as I started shaking.

"Did… did you just say what I think you just said?" I asked breathlessly.

"Yeah, I did." Jude confirmed, reaching out to take hold of both of my hands as he stepped even closer to me.

I could barely breath as he stepped closer. He leaned forward until his lips were scarcely a millimeter apart from mine.

"I love you, Connor Stevens." He said softly.

I couldn't stop myself from crying.

He loved me.

Jude _loved_ me.

"I-I l-love y-you too, J-Jude A-Adams F-Foster."

We both broke.

We practically threw ourselves at each other, kissing with an intensity that we'd never done before, but neither of us could stop. We were so overcome with emotion and love that we lost control a little bit. We stumbled and fell onto his bed, where we lay and continued our kissing, not pausing, not calming a single degree.

I couldn't think. I didn't want to. I just wanted to kiss the boy I loved.

We clung to each other we kissed, laying flush against each other with our hands roaming each other's backs. Every touch, every second that my fingers remained in contact with his skin was like an electric charge to my brain, demanding more as our tongues dueled each other, fighting for dominance. The noises Jude was asking only added kindle to the fire, and the kissing intensified until Jude pushed me off of him, and then we were both gasping for air.

"J-Jesus Christ." Jude muttered shakily.

He was trembling from head to toe, and he reached behind him and grabbed his pillow, placing it in his lap and clinging to it as he tried to calm himself.

"You okay?" I asked breathlessly.

"Yeah, just… we got a bit carried away. I almost… you know." Jude said heavily, and his eyes flicked downward towards the pillow.

"O-Oh… shit, I'm sorry." I immediately apologized.

"It's fine." Jude stammered as he attempted to regain some composure, "I liked it. I've… I've never felt anything like that before. That was… intense. SO intense."

"Y-Yeah." I said softly, "So you're not mad that I almost made you… uh, you know."

"No." Jude said, blushing beat red, "I'm not mad. This kind of thing is natural with couples."

"Okay." I said, taking a deep breath to calm myself, "Just promise me you'll tell me if I do something that makes you uncomfortable, or if I try to do something you aren't ready for."

"I promise." Jude said, and leaned in to kiss me again.

"I-I thought we were done." I said dumbly a minute later when we separated.

"Now we are." Jude said tiredly, "I feel so drained."

"Yeah, me too."

Jude slide under the covers, and I covered up with a big spare blanket while lying on top of the covers. I wrapped my arm around him and pulled him closer to me, bringing his back flush with my chest.

"Goodnight, Jude." I whispered, "I love you."

"I love you too."

************

The next day, we spent all morning and most of the afternoon together until I had to go home. Even after I went home, I was constantly texting him.

The day after that, I was sitting at home by myself because Jude was spending the day with Callie and Benjji, when there was a knock on the door. I went and looked through the peephole to see who it was.

It was my Dad. I opened the door and offered him a small smile.

"Hey." I said.

"Hey." He said awkwardly, "Just thought I'd drop by and uh, check on you."

"Okay." I said, "You uh, wanna come in?"

"Yeah, sure."

I led him into the living room, and we sat down. I sat in the chair, while he sat on the couch.

"Where's Jude?" He asked.

"He's spending the day with Callie and their old foster brother Benjji."

"Ah. How are you two doing?" He asked.

"Great. He, uh… he told me loved me. On his birthday."

"Wow, uh… that's wonderful, buddy."

"I know." I said with a smile, "I love him so much, Dad. He's the first person that really gets me, one hundred percent."

"Yeah, I know how you feel." Dad said softly, "Or, now I do, anyway."

"I'm guessing things with Ritchie are good?"

Dad laughed.

"Yeah. They're going great." He said.

"I'm not used to you smiling so… brightly." I teased.

"I'm not used to smiling so brightly either." He said, "But things are good now. Ritch and I've spent pretty much every day this week together. I barely go back to the house anymore. Holds too many bad memories."

"Yeah… I confronted them about it." I revealed, "Grandma and Grandpa."

"You did?" Dad asked, shocked, "Why?"

"I was furious with them." I continued, "I was pissed about all the pain they caused you, and I made sure they knew it. I wanted answers."

"While I'm touched that you're so outraged on my behalf, that wasn't necessary." Dad said gently, "What happened, happened. It's in the past now, and there's no use digging it back up when it's finally been buried. Besides, there really wasn't any other way for it to play out. At the time, my parents had sunk every penny they had into a failed business, and they were financially broken. My grandfather's money got them out of it. It kept them afloat."

"I don't care how much money was involved." I spat, "If I ever have kids, I would never sell them out like they did to you! No matter how much cash was at stake. Neither would Jude!"

"It was more the threat of losing our home and Grandfather threatening to kill me that caused them to cave in." Dad argued calmly, "Again, I appreciate that you're outraged, but in this case it's best to just let things lie."

"I wanted answers." I continued, "They owed us both that much after what they did, all the problems it caused for us. It led to decades of pain for you, and then it led to you hurting me."

Dad immediately deflates when I mention the abuse I suffered.

"I-I know." He said softly, "I can't apologize enough."

"It's okay, Dad…"

"The hell it is, Connor." Dad interrupted, "I fucking abused you. I abused you, your brother, and your mother."

"Yeah, but it wasn't really you, though." I argued, "I've forgiven you, Dad."

"I know you have, I just… I can't forgive myself." He said brokenly as the tears start, "I don't think I'll ever be able to."

"We've both suffered, Dad." I said gently as I stood and sat down on the couch next to him, "I know you're sorry. I know you'll never do it again. That's what counts. You don't have to beat yourself up over it anymore. I've got my Dad back. That's all I wanted."

I leaned my head on my Dad's shoulder and put an arm around his shoulder. It barely struck me how strange it was to be comforting my father.

"I love you, Dad." I said, "And I forgive you. Jude forgives you. Mom forgives you. Eric forgives. We all forgive you, Dad. Completely."

"I-I love you too, Connor." Dad said, "And thank you."


	10. Chapter 10

I woke up that morning, not really expecting the day to be out of the ordinary. I looked out the window to see that it was cloudy, and I could hear somebody making breakfast in the kitchen downstairs. I knew it was Eric, because Mom was in Los Angeles for a conference and Dad was skiing in the Rockies with Ritchie. I looked at my clock absent mindedly to see that it was just after 10:30 in the morning, much later then I usually slept in. I threw on a tank top and a pair of basketball shorts and headed to the kitchen. Eric stood at the counter eating a waffle drenched with syrup. He turned to see me standing there.

"Hey little bro." He greeted, "I made waffles if you want some."

"Thanks." I said, "I haven't had waffles in a while. It's always pancakes."

We sat at the table together, and I loaded my plate.

"How are things with Benji?" I asked.

"They're going well." Eric said happily, "I went to see his band play, and we went out to dinner afterwards. It was great."

"I'm glad to hear that. You deserve it." I said.

"Yeah… I really like him Connie." Eric said softly, "I haven't been this happy in a long time."

"I'm glad." I said, "You don't deserve to be so sad all the time."

"Thanks baby brother." He said.

"Is it weird?" I asked, "The age difference?"

"Not really." Eric answered honestly, "Age doesn't matter anyway."

"That's what Jude said." I said absently.

"Your boyfriend is a smart kid." Eric said with a small smile.

"Except for math, yeah." I said with a small laugh, "I'm way better at math."

"How are things between you two?" Eric asked, "Still going strong?"

"Yeah." I said, "Everything's still great. Better, even."

"How so?" He asked.

"He told me he loved me." I said a goofy smile stretching across my face, "And I said it back."

Eric looked stunned for a moment, before he started smiling.

"Aww. My baby brother is all grown up and in love." He teased.

"Yeah. I am." I admitted, blushing lightly.

"I'm happy for you." Eric continued seriously, "I remembered when I first realized I was in love with Andy. There's no feeling like it, man. That feeling you get when they walk into the room, and suddenly you can't look at anybody else but them. When you kiss, you can't breathe but you don't care if you suffocate, you almost welcome it as long as the kissing continues. You feel electricity in your veins with every touch. You can lay next to them in bed and just stare at them for hours, memorizing every detail, falling even further in love with every passing second. That feeling you get when you know, without question and beyond any shadow of a doubt, that you would destroy anybody who attempted to do them harm…"

His eyes had glazed over slightly as he spoke.

"You okay?" I asked.

He startled slightly and sighed.

"Yeah, I'm fine." He said.

"You're right you know." I said, "Every word of it. That's exactly what it's like."

************

An hour later, I walked into the Adams Foster house as I always did. Jesus was asleep on the couch, lulled to sleep by the light melody that Brandon was playing on the piano. Mariana and Callie were at the kitchen table doing homework.

I walked up the stairs and found Jude's door ajar. He stood in front of his shelf, and in his hands, he cradled a small black plastic gaming system that I recognized immediately.

"Is that what I think it is?" I asked, taking my backpack and sitting it by his bed.

"Yep." He said simply with a small smile, "The PSP you gave me. See?"

He held it up for me to see.

"I'm surprised you still have it." I said, "And there's still not a scratch on it."

"Well, what did you think I did with it?" Jude asked sassily, "Throw it away or hit it with a baseball bat? Of course I kept it. It was the first real gift I had ever gotten. I just wish the battery wasn't dead."

"Why don't you charge it?" I asked.

"Well, it might be because the giant goofball blonde that gave it to me never gave me a charger." Jude joked.

"Oh. Shit, sorry about that." I said, "I'll bring it over tomorrow."

He smiled and kissed my cheek in thanks. We both sat down on his bed, and I wrapped his hand in mine.

"I remember the day I gave it to you." I said softly, "You were so small and cute, standing there in your button up shirt and slicked back hair… and look at you now. You have grown up so much. When we met, I could have lifted you above my head with no problem. Now… look at you. You're…"

"Taller? More buff?"

"…Gorgeous." I finished, "Absolutely gorgeous… and well, yeah. Taller, more buff and longer hair."

Jude laughed, and leaned into kiss me on the lips lightly.

"I love you." He said, "And that was smooth."

"I try my best." I said with a wink, "And I love you too."

He laughed again.

"I remember my first thought about you." Jude said gently, "I didn't think you were real, and I'd never met anybody like you before. After the nail polish, and you sticking up for me, I almost thought you were a hallucination. Nobody ever bothered to actually look at me and see me for who I was. You did that. I could be honest with you and not be judged. I could be who I was. Then you gave me this, a game system that cost $200 brand new, just because you saw I didn't have much stuff… I knew that it would kill me to let you go."

"If only they could see us now." I said.

"Who?"

"Our younger selves." I clarified, "If they only knew what they would become. What they would go through, and the pay off."

"I think if anybody had told me what you would become to me, I'd have called them insane." Jude said honestly, "When I first got here, I thought I'd be in another home within months. I didn't think I'd ever be able to have a significant other."

"I didn't either because, well… you know how Dad was." I agreed, "Despite all the crap we went through, I wouldn't change a thing. We're in a good place now."

"I agree." Jude said.

He took my other hand in his, and I noticed that his nails were, again, devoid of nail polish.

"You haven't worn it in a while." I said softly, "Our war paint."

"Haven't needed to." Jude said simply.

"What do you mean?" I asked.

"It was sort of a safety blanket." Jude explained, "I wore it when I was expecting a battle or trouble or stress. Our war is over, so I don't really need it."

"Fair enough." I conceded, "I like it though. I've been thinking about doing mine again."

"I never did ask you where you got it from." Jude realized, "The nail polish you wore that day at school. I was too busy trying not to tackle you with a bear hug. I probably would have if I wasn't afraid I'd scare you off."

I laughed at that.

"You wouldn't have scared me off." I assured, "Would you have made me blush? Oh, hell yeah. But you wouldn't have scared me off."

"Anyway though, where did you get it?" Jude asked.

"I waited until both mom and dad left for work and then I swiped it from mom's bathroom." I explained, "They were both gone not to long after I woke up, so I took it and put it on about fifteen minutes before I left for school."

"How'd your dad take it when you came home?" Jude asked.

"HA!" I guffawed, "Did you really think I'd ever let him see that? Oh, hell no. No fricken way, babe."

"How did you cover it up then?" Jude asked.

"I had soccer practice that day." I explained, "Because I had a game that Saturday before I was supposed to come over to yours for the project…"

"Oh yeah, right. I remember that. You told momma that you won." Jude said.

"Exactly." I continued, "Well, it rained a bit during the afternoon. I knew I couldn't let dad see my nails, so I would have to get dirty enough to go straight to the shower when I got home. Sooooo, I dove headfirst into a mud puddle before I walked home."

Jude snorted and laughed.

"Yeah, dad took one look at me, face palmed, and just pointed right up the stairs." I continued, "I barricaded myself in the bathroom and turned the shower on while I sat on the toilet and cleaned the polish off. Took a long time too, it's a bitch to get it off. After I got all cleaned up and showered I'd been in there for two hours."

"Wow."

"Yeah, so it didn't go off without a hitch." I said, "Dad poked at me all night about it."

"Why? What did he think you were doing?" Jude asked.

I could feel my cheeks heating up.

"Um, well… he thought I was, uh… you know…"

Jude just looked confused.

"Oh, you sweet innocent little thing." I thought to myself

"They thought I was jacking off, okay?" I blurted, feeling my face heat up and knowing that my face most likely resembled a tomato in color.

Jude didn't react at all like I thought he would to that statement.

I expected him to choke on his own breath and turn red as a freshly boiled lobster, and stammer over his next word. Because it's Jude we're talking about here. Sweet, innocent, cinnamon roll Jude Adams Foster.

But no.

"There's a nice mental image."

I did a double take, because I could not believe what I was seeing and hearing.

Not even thirty seconds ago, I had thought of him as a "sweet innocent little thing". But Jude had actually said that… and now he was smirking at me.

"Who the hell are you and what have you done with Jude Adams Foster?" I asked, only partially kidding.

He started laughing.

Very hard.

"Stop laughing at me!" I pouted.

"I-I w-w-wish y-you could se-e-e the look on y-your f-face right now!" He guffawed, practically rolling around.

"I can't believe you just said that!" I shot back.

"Oh please, like you haven't thought the same about me before." Jude teased, "Your favorite thing about us going to the beach together is seeing me with no shirt on."

"Hey, I… Okay, you've got a point." I conceded, "It's just, we've never really talked about this kind of thing together yet. I mean, we got carried away at your birthday, but we never really talked about it afterwards."

"Do you want to?" He asked.

"I think we need to." I said, "Make sure we're both on the same page."

"I agree." He said, "What we did that day, I liked it, and I know you did too. We almost pushed each other over the edge, to put it bluntly. I don't think I'm ready for anything more than that yet. We're still so young."

"I agree." I said, "We shouldn't rush these things. We've got years to figure these things out."

"We need to be careful about it." Jude said, "I know we have parents who are far more laid back than others, but…"

"…We don't want to get caught in a compromising position." I finished, "Agreed. It'd take years of therapy to recover from that."

"For them too, not just us." He interjected.

"I think Dad would have a heart attack…" I guessed.

"And Eric would laugh himself silly." Jude finished.

I nodded.

"Okay… change the subject?" He asked.

"Oh definitely." I agreed, "Video games?"

"Video games." He agreed.

************

Twelve hours later, we were at the beach with Taylor, Daria, Evan, Mikey and Jimmy. We sat in a circle in the sand on our towels on a more secluded part of the beach near the pier where nobody usually went. It was the first time in a while that all of us have been able to get together and have a day out. We'd spent the whole walk from Jude's house to the beach talking and bantering.

We'd all just sat down when Jude turned to Evan.

"How's things at home?" Jude asked.

"Much better." Evan said with a sigh, "Mom filed a restraining order against Dad. He's not allowed within a hundred yards of us."

"So he's following it?" I asked.

"So far, yeah." Evan said.

"Good. Good riddance to him." Jude said, "One thing I can't stand is parents who hurt their kids because of their sexuality. I had enough of that in foster care."

"I thought you didn't know you were gay until you met Connor?" Taylor questioned.

"I didn't, but that didn't stop them." Jude answered, "My last foster dad was a real piece of work. He beat the crap out of me."

"Why? What did you do?" Taylor asked.

Jude shot a look at me, before taking a deep breath.

"I tried on a dress because I was bored." He said quietly, "And he caught me. Beat me. Callie had to stop him. Beat his car with a bat."

"Shit, dude…" Evan groaned.

"Don't worry about it. It was a long time ago now." Jude assured, "I never have to see him again, and your dad isn't allowed near you again."

"He better hope I never meet him." Mikey growled, "If I do, I might stab him in the eyes."

"Don't be stupid." Jude rebuked.

"Yeah, Evan's stronger than you and he got the crap beat out of him." Taylor interjected in agreement, "You wouldn't stand a snowball's chance in hell."

I decided against voicing my opinion, because personally I agreed with Mikey. I shared a look with the others, and saw that Jimmy was nodding in agreement with Mikey while Daria was facepalming. Evan was keeping his face carefully blank, and hiding his emotions. He wore the same look whenever we played poker.

"Violence isn't the answer." Jude continued, "All it does is make things worse and cause more trouble, and the last thing my family and this group needs is more trouble and violence."

"He'd deserve it." Mikey insisted, "He beat the crap out of Evan! He deserves it…"

"You don't know what you're talking about, you fucking idiot." Jude growled, "Haven't you ever heard the saying: those who seek revenge better dig two graves? There's a reason for it you dunce."

"The hell I don't know what I'm talking about!" Mikey argued angrily, "Sometimes that's the only language people understand, and you clearly don't get it…"

Jude snapped. He leapt to his feet, and ripped his shirt off over his head. He threw his shirt over his shoulder.

"Out of all people, you say that to me?!" He shouted pointing to his chest, "How dare you!? These prove that I'm fluent in that language more than you could ever fucking understand!"

They were faint, but I could see the scars and so could everybody else. He turned around and displayed the scars that were on his back. The scars ranged from cuts, to burns.

"AND THESE!" Jude screamed, "So don't you DARE sit there and fucking tell me I don't know."

Mikey's eyes widened and he tried to backtrack but I reached out and tapped him, shaking my head when he looked at me to alert him to stay silent. Jude took a shuddering breath and calmed himself down enough to where he wasn't screaming. By no means was he finished though, as seconds later he launched into a rant.

"In all but two of my foster homes, I went through things that NO ONE, should EVER have to go through." Jude ranted, "Thrown bodily into a bathtub full of boiling hot water and screaming as it scalded my skin! Curling up on the floor in the fetal position while being kicked and punched! Having my hand burnt over a stove! Having to watch what I'm eating because I'm afraid my foster brothers have put fucking rat poison in it! Being so hungry that you're afraid you're gonna starve to death and crying yourself to sleep at night because you're terrified and hungry. Being locked in a tool shed over night at nine years old for wetting the bed! Screaming for mercy, and hearing it every time you close your eyes!"

Everybody stared at Jude dumbfounded. I was aware that this was the first time any of them had been subjected to Jude's temper, or had seen Jude snap.

"It's like ACID to your brain whenever you think about it!" Jude continued, "It's a pain that's bone deep and eternal. It _never_ goes away! I take that pain, and I keep it deep inside. I let it police me, keep me in check. I use it as a reminder to keep myself from sinking down to the level of the scum that hurt me, because I know that all it takes is one moment of weakness, one second where your control slips and then you become the monster that you once cowered from, and that's something that you can never recover from because it slowly poisons your blood and mind until you've devolved into a violent beast."

His speech finally concluded, silence fell over the group.

"I had no idea…" Mikey said.

"No. You didn't." Jude said waspishly.

"How the hell are you still sane?" Mikey asked in amazement, "How have you never snapped? How can you not want revenge?"

"You think I haven't thought about it?" Jude asked, "Of course I have. But going through with it would only lower me to the same level as that scum, and I promised myself a long time ago I would never do that. I will NEVER be like them. Ever!"

Mikey looked thoroughly chastised and sheepish.

"I'm sorry." Mikey said softly, "I didn't mean to upset you like that…"

"Well, here's a novel idea," Jude began with a growl, "How about you learn to think before you OPEN YOUR FUCKING MOUTH!"

I got to my feet and grabbed Jude's arm and pulled, dragging him close enough so I could wrap my arms tightly around him. I rubbed circles in his back to calm him, and he wrapped his arms around my waist, burying his face in my neck.

"Calm down, baby." I soothed, "You need to calm down. I hate seeing you get angry like this."

"I know." He muttered.

"Take a few deep breaths." I said softly, and he did so.

After Jude calmed down, we tried to salvage the trip. We only hang around for about an hour before we give it up as a lost cause and headed home. Everybody but Evan peeled off and headed home, while the three of us headed to Jude's house.

"I always wondered what you'd look like if you got angry." Evan commented, "Now I know never to piss you off. You, my friend, are scary as hell."

"Thanks… I guess." Jude responded flatly.

None of us talked until we got to Jude's house and were walking up the driveway.

"That's my mom's car." Evan pointed out.

The hair on the back of my neck stood up, and I immediately felt uneasy. We walked through the door of the house and Stef, Lena, and Evan's mother Kate were all waiting for us. Kate looked exhausted, and as soon as she saw Evan she ran and grabbed him in an embrace.

"What's going on?" Jude asked.

Stef and Lena shared a look.

"Evan is going to be staying with us for a while." Lena said.

"Not that I'm complaining, but why?" Jude asked, his face scrunched in confusion.

"It's for his safety." Stef said.

"What do you mean?" Evan asked confused.

"About an hour ago, police and fire units were dispatched to your house." Stef told him gently, "It was an inferno, and it's been ruled as arson. Your father is the prime suspect."

Evan froze, standing stock still.

"Your mother is going to be staying with your grandfather for a while." Stef continued telling him, "But she is worried that your father will look there and she doesn't want him finding you. She's scared that he's going to target you. So she's asked if you could stay here for a while until we're sure it's safe, and Lena and I have agreed."

Evan started to shake uncontrollably, and he turned to me. I grabbed him and hugged him as hard as I could, comforting him in the same way I always do for Jude.

"It's going to be okay." I said softly, "We're not going to let him hurt you again, I promise."

"H-He's never g-gonna leave me alone." Evan whimpered.

"Stef's a cop, Evy." I reminded him, "You'll be safe here. He'd be stupid to try and come here."


	11. Chapter 11

It's March now, and Evan is still staying with us.

To be honest, we had all been laboring under the delusion that he would be staying with us for a couple of days, then his dad would be caught and he could go home. We should have known, to be honest, that we would never get that lucky. This tension has been near constant, and Evan is slowly beginning to unravel. He's constantly terrified. He jumps at shadows, he cowers every time he sees anybody who even looks like his dad, and he wakes me up screaming from nightmares at least three times a week.

Last night was no exception.

I was in the middle of a… well, _interesting_ dream of my own. A dream involving me and Connor. The kind of dream I'm incapable of recalling without blushing. I know I shouldn't find it embarrassing, but I can't really help it. I've talked to Brandon and Jesus about it, and they've both told me it's normal, and a part of being a teenager. Sometimes I'm grateful that I have my brothers. They may tease me, they may be crazy, but they really care and are always willing to talk.

Anyway, I'm getting sidetracked.

Evan woke up with a jolt and a shout, scaring me and Jesus out of our slumber.

"Whazgoinon?" Jesus grumbled sleepily.

"He had a nightmare." I told him, "Go back to sleep."

"Nah. S'alright." He said, pushing back the covers and plodding over to plop down onto the floor by Evan's sleeping bag, "I can help. I helped you with your nightmares, I can try to help him with his too."

That is true. For a while after Callie and I moved into the house, I had nightmares about my former foster homes. For a couple of months after Connor got shot, I had horrific nightmares. I always dreamed that Connor had been shot in the head instead of the foot. He would sit on the edge of the bed talking to me, telling me it was alright and that everything was going to be fine. He would sit there and comfort me until I fell back asleep. On the nights after they took us in, when the nightmares were really bad, he would let me cuddle up with him and he would comfort me while I cried myself to sleep.

"You okay, Evan?" Jesus asked gently.

Evan replied by shuddering violently and tears started falling.

"C'mere." Jesus said, and Evan hugged him tight, crying into his shoulder, "It's okay, buddy. You're safe here."

"W-What if h-he comes here?" Evan croaked, "W-What if he t-tries to h-hurt me? What if h-he tries t-to hurt you guys?"

"He's not gonna find you." Jesus assured.

"But what if he does!?" Evan stammered.

"Then we'll protect you." He said gently, but sternly, "They have the police watching the whole neighborhood just in case he comes around. If he tries to get in the house, mom will stop him. He'll be lucky just to get arrested, and not shot as well."

Evan snorted wetly.

"We're all here for you, dude." I said, "All of us. You have an army behind you, he doesn't. We'll keep you safe."

"Thanks guys." Evan said with a sniffle, "Sorry I woke you up."

"Hey, don't worry about it bro." Jesus said, "I'm used to helping with nightmares. I've helped both Mariana and Jude through theirs, I don't mind helping you with yours."

After talking for about twenty minutes, Evan finally fell back asleep. Jesus slowly stood up, being careful not to wake him back up.

"Thanks, Jesus." I said.

"Hey, I meant what I said." He responded, "I'm always willing to help."

When we woke up later that morning, Evan was already downstairs getting breakfast. We took advantage of not having school to laze around and watch Star Wars all day.

I missed Connor.

Mid-Winter break had started two days ago, and normally Connor and I would spend as much time as we wanted together. At the moment that was quite impossible because Connor had joined his dad and Ritchie on a trip to Las Vegas. They had left for Vegas almost immediately after school got out for break, and I didn't actually know how long they would be staying.

Evan and I were sitting on the living room couch watching The Empire Strikes Back when my phone buzzed, and I took it out of my pocket to see that I had a text from Connor.

"Hey, u wanna FaceTime?" The text read.

"Hey, I'll be back in a bit." I said, "Connor wants to FaceTime."

"'Kay. Tell him I said hi." Evan muttered sleepily.

I shot a worried look over my shoulder at him as I headed to the stairs, before I rushed up to my room, and moments later, Connor's wide smiling face filled my phone screen.

"Hey, babe!" He said, his smile dimming slightly and his brow furrowing, "God, you look tired."

"Yeah, Evan had a nightmare last night." I explained, "Me and Jesus both got woke up."

"Shit. I bet Jesus wasn't happy." Connor guessed.

"Actually… he handled it really well." I recalled, "He's… Jesus is really good at that kind of thing. Helping get over nightmares, I mean. Momma said that he used to do it for Mariana when they were little. He did it for me when they took us in, and after you got shot."

Connor barely flinched at the mention of the Incident.

"He's kind of taken Evan under his wing." I continued.

"Does Jesus know about… you know." Connor asked.

"Yeah. I told him to be careful about it." I said, "The last thing Evan needs is to get hurt because of mixed signals."

We always talked about the subject carefully, trying not to give away too much of what it was about.

The fact of the matter is that Evan has a giant crush on Jesus, a fact that Evan confessed to Connor and I with his cheeks flaming red from embarrassment. We teased him about having a thing for older men, which Evan called ridiculous because Jesus is only about a year and eight months older than us.

"I'm fifteen, he's seventeen." Evan had defended, his face a beet red, "Not that big of an age gap."

After Jesus started helping Evan through his nightmares, they started hanging out together more often to the point that Evan spent at least as much time with Jesus as he did with me, Connor and the guys. I was afraid that Jesus would end up unintentionally leading Evan on, so one day after they got home from hanging at the mall all day, I pulled Jesus aside and told him about Evan's crush and swore him to secrecy. He took it in stride, admitting that he was flattered, and treated Evan no differently than he had before.

"He's still scared about his dad finding him." I said, "He's afraid he's going to show up here and hurt us."

"Did you give any thought to my suggestion?" Connor asked.

"Which one?"

"About you learning to throw a punch." He clarified.

"Yeah. Mom, Mike, Brandon and Callie agreed to teach me some stuff." I responded, "Momma suggested enrolling me in karate or something, but it costs too much."

"Yeah, I considered that too." Connor agreed, "Price is ridiculous."

"Anyway, happier things." I said to change the subject, "How's Vegas?"

Connor huffed and immediately looked irritated.

"It's so. Fricken. HOT. HERE. JUDE!" He whined, "How the hell is it possible for a place to be seventy five degrees is MARCH?! It's the Devil's doing, I'm convinced. Sin City is right!"

I giggled at his rant.

"Aww, is my baby too hot and uncomfortable?" I teased, enjoying the way he flushed a deep shade of red at the teasing term of endearment…

And then my brain caught up with my mouth and realized that I'd just called Connor "my baby". I felt my own cheeks heat up and I looked away embarrassedly.

"Sorry… I have no idea where that came from." I stammered.

"I-It's okay." Connor responded shyly, "It's uh… is it weird that I kind of liked that?"

"Um… you did?" I asked in surprise.

"Yeah, uh. It felt kind of nice." He responded with a small smile, "It was sweet. I don't mind it if you don't."

A short silence followed before I decided to direct our conversation back to Vegas.

"Uh, anyway. Vegas?" I asked, "How's your Dad and Ritchie?"

"Oh god, those two." He complains with a fond smile on his face, "They act like lovesick teenagers half the time. They're happy. They're great for each other, I love the way they are together."

"Aww, I can hear the wedding bells already." I joke, "Can I be in the wedding?"

Connor froze. He slowly raised his eyes back to mine, and they were very wide.

"Jesus, what's that look for?" I asked, "You'd think they eloped or something."

Connor turned very, _very red_. I stared at him for a second, before realization hit and I gasped.

Oh, my _god!!!_

"Holy shit, they did didn't they?" I babbled excitedly, "Did they really elope in Vegas?"

Connor couldn't fight the smile any longer, and a face-splitting grin stretched his features. He couldn't respond with words, so he simply nodded.

"OH MY GOD!" I squealed while bouncing on my bed , "I'm so happy for you guys! Get him on the phone with you!"

Adam must have been watching, because seconds later his face popped up on the screen. I can safely say that I have never seen the man so happy in the entire time I had known him.

"Hey, Jude!" He said.

"Hey, Adam!" I responded, "I'm so fricken happy for you guys! Please, tell me there are pictures?"

"Oh, yeah." He said, "There are plenty of pictures, believe me. Ritchie went a bit nuts with pictures. "

"What made you guys decide to do it?" I asked.

"It just felt right." Adam said, "It felt like we'd wasted enough time. It took about four hours to convince Ritchie that I really wanted to do this, and that I was ready for it. Once he was convinced though, I don't think I've ever seen a person so happy."

I stared at their happy faces and sighed. It was hard to believe that this was real. Connor and I became a couple May 24th 2014. It's now March 14th 2015, and everything had changed so radically that the way things were seemed like a whole different universe.

"How far we've all come." I said, "Ten months ago, our family was the textbook definition of a mess. Now look at us. You two are married, Connor and I are still together, and everything… god, it's almost hard to believe."

"Kind of hard to believe it's been ten months." Connor agreed, smiling at me, "It was worth every minute though."

"Yeah." I agreed, "Oh, I was gonna ask. When are you guys gonna be back?"

"We're gonna be here for at least three more days." Adam answered.

"I promise, I'll be over as soon as I get back." Connor promised.

*************

True to Connor's promise, three days later at noon he arrived back at my house. I was still asleep, and was woken up by him crawling into the bed beside me and draping his arm around me.

"Hi." He said simply.

I rolled over and pulled him into a kiss, to which he responded enthusiastically.

"Missed you." I said.

"Missed you too." He said, "Where's Evan?"

"He and Jesus are hanging out at the skate park today." I responded, "Jesus was gonna teach him to board."

"Oh god, that could be a disaster." Connor said with a look of horror, "Remember what happened when Jesus and I tried to teach you to board?"

"Yes, I remember and I recall we agreed to never mention that again?" I said with a flush.

"Right, sorry." He said, "When you're ready to get up, I brought pictures from the wedding."

I jolted up in bed.

"Show me. Show me now." I demanded with an excited bounce.

He pulled his laptop out of his bag, and opened up the folder containing the wedding photos. The chapel they got married in was clearly a cheap stereotypical Vegas chapel, but you could tell by the smiles on the Stevens's faces that they couldn't care less. One picture in particular caught my eye and made me smile. It was a picture of Connor hugging both Adam and Ritchie with a teary smile on my face.

"I always used to wonder how you felt having two moms." Connor said, "I don't know if it feels the same as having two dads, but it feels awesome."

"Technically you have two dads and your mom." I reminded him, "I have two moms and my dad. The parallel is there, though."

"He does feel like a dad to me though." Connor continued, "Ritchie, I mean. I've almost called him that a couple of times. It's… I really like that."

"I'm glad." I said and wrapped him in a hug.

We spent most of the time playing video games until Connor had to go home for the night. When Evan and Jesus got back, Evan commandeered the video games and Jesus pulled me aside.

"Hey, uh… can I talk to you in private, Jude?" He asked.

"Yeah, of course. Is everything okay?" I asked.

"Yeah, I just need to talk."

We head up to our room and closed the door. I sat down on my bed, and Jesus sat next to me.

"Alright, so what's bothering you?" I asked

"Nothing's bothering me really, just… I'm confused about some things." He continued.

"Like what?"

"Well, you know how Evan and I have become really close friends recently?" He asked.

"Yeah, kind of hard not to notice." I said, "You two are practically attached at the hip. Why? What happened?" I asked confused.

"We were at the skate park." Jesus explained, "And he wiped out. He was really embarrassed and I helped him up and stuff. There wasn't anybody else there, so I didn't really get why he was embarrassed. We took a break and we started talking, and… Jude, he told me."

"Wait, what?" I stammered in wide-eyed shock, "He told you? You mean he actually said…"

"That he likes me? Yeah. He did." Jesus continued.

"Um. Wow." I said, unable to come up with anything else to say.

"Yeah. That's not even all of it." Jesus said quietly.

"Why, what else happened?" I asked.

I turned to look at him, and he was staring straight ahead.

"Jesus?"

"He… He kissed me, Jude." Jesus said softly.

I stared at Jesus in shock.

"Fuckin' hell." I said, "When he goes for it he really goes for it, huh?"

"Ha. Yeah." Jesus said, "Jude… I'm really confused right now."

"Why are you confused?" I asked, "You already knew he had a crush on you."

"Yeah I know that… I just…" He stammered, "Well… I kissed him back."

I stared at him in shock, and he looked and sounded just as shocked by his own admission as I felt.

"I kissed him back, and… it was actually really _nice_. But I've only ever liked girls before! I have no idea why the heck this is happening."

I stared at him, struggling to find the words. This was the last thing I ever expected to hear from Jesus.

"It is possible to like both girls and guys you know?" I reminded him.

"Of course I know that." Jesus snarked, "It's not the liking him part I'm confused about. I know I like him, but I've never looked at another boy this way until him."

"Well, when did you start having these feelings for him?" I asked.

"After we got close." He answered.

"You might be demisexual then." I guessed.

"What the hell does that mean?" Jesus asked confused.

"It means you only form an attraction to somebody you have a deep emotional connection with." I explained, "And I think it's safe to say that you two have that now."

"I guess." He conceded, "I mean, I only started noticing Emma after we became good friends so it does kind of make sense."

"So, what are you guys now?" I asked.

"Well… Neither of us is ready to put a label on it yet." Jesus explained, "We need to talk about it a little bit more. We like each other and we know it, so… we're going to try it, see what happens and go from there. I'm… I'm actually really hoping it goes well."

"So am I." I said, "And I'm happy for you guys."

****************

The happy haze that surrounded the beginning of Jesus and Evan's relationship lasted for exactly three days. The two talked a lot, and they finally agreed that their relationship was as boyfriend and boyfriend. It came as a shock to Moms and the rest of the siblings, but it was a welcome one. Jesus nearly crapped himself explaining it to Evan's mom, who responded with a hug and thanking Jesus for helping Evan feel better.

As it turned out though, the happiness wouldn't last.

We were at the mall together. Connor and I, Benji and Eric, Evan and Jesus. We were all spending the day together. Evan joked more than once about it being a triple date. We were all having a great time. We had lunch, saw a movie and then we fooled around at the arcade for a while. We were heading out to the car to leave the mall, and all the while Jesus was grumbling about Eric's penchant for parking miles away from the doors to avoid the paint on his Avalanche being scratched. We approached the Avalanche, and I noticed that a small Saturn was parked next to it. I tensed.

The door of the Saturn opened, the driver stepped out and shouted.

"EVAN!"

Many things happened at one.

Evan whimpered and launched himself at Jesus, burying his face in the crook of his neck. Me, Connor, and Benji form a wall in front of them while Eric steps forward and draws his pistol.

It was Evan's dad.

"Don't take another step closer!" Eric ordered, pointing the pistol directly at his head.

Evan's dad was of average height, and had short brown hair. He was a large man, his beer belly stretching his shirt to the limit. He was wearing clothes that looked as though they hadn't  been washed in quite a long time. He was glaring at our assembled group with hateful daggers in his eyes.

"Who the fuck are you?" He snarled.

"That's none of your business." Eric growled.

Next to me, I heard Benji quietly calling the police. I mentally praised him for it, but at the same time I knew that the police would not arrive in time.

"That kid is my son, so it is my fucking business!" Evan's dad shouted, "You have no right to keep him from me!"

"I have every right!" Eric shouted back, "There is a restraining order out against you as well as a warrant for your arrest. I'm not gonna let you anywhere near him."

"Typical of you, Evan!" Evan's dad shouted at him, "Cowering behind others like the little bitch you are! Nasty little faggot! What's he doing to get you to protect him, huh? Whose bitch is he now…?"

Eric snarled and fired a shot into the air before, causing Connor to let out a frightened cry of his own as a panic attack was triggered. I immediately pulled him into a tight hug. Jesus looked at the disgusting man like he wanted to strangle him with his bare hands. In fact, if Evan weren't clinging to him desperately, he probably would have tried.

"You have five seconds to leave before I put the next one in your chest!" Eric ordered.

The two men stared at each other for a moment before Evan's dad backed off and walked back to his car.

"This isn't over." He swore, "You'll all pay for this."

He slammed the door to the car, and drove quickly from the parking lot.

I held Connor in a vice like grip. Behind us, I could hear Evan sobbing. Once his breathing was back to normal and he had regained his senses,I pulled away from Connor slightly and kissed his forehead. He was alarmingly pale, looked a bit nauseous and was shaking. I rubbed his back to try to offer some comfort.

"You okay?" I asked.

"Yeah, just… gunshots." He stammered shakily.

We turned to where Evan and Jesus stood. Evan was a sobbing wreck and Jesus was staring after the car with a look of pure hatred. His facial expression was reminiscent of a wild animal defending its mate from attack or harm. Eric looks at all of us before pulling out his phone.

"Who are you calling?" I asked.

"He knows our faces now." Eric said, "He knows who Evan is staying with. It won't take much to find out where. He needs more protection, and I have a friend who owes me a favor and works as a bodyguard."

As the police sirens drew closer and closer, he dials the phone. A few seconds later, as police cars pull into the parking lot, the call goes through.

"Yeah, Danny, it's Eric." Eric said, "I need your help. I need you to meet me as soon as you can. I'll forward you the address. I'm calling in my favor."


	12. Chapter 12

Connor's POV:

Over the next three hours, the house became the most heavily watched and guarded house in San Diego. By the end of the week, there was police patrolling the neighborhood twenty-four hours a day and a squad car sat in the driveway at all times. Eric's friend Daniel arrived the morning after the Mall incident, and was basically assigned to us kids as a bodyguard. Brandon, Callie and I both found the added security to be irritating and suffocating, but we were the exception. The rest of the family welcomed it, especially Evan. I did not trust Daniel. I knew nothing about him, and his whole demeanor set off warning bells. He prowled around after us, always keeping us within eyesight, glaring frighteningly at anybody who looked at us wrongly. Jude was aware of my feelings, but felt I was just being overly paranoid.

Jesus made it his own personal mission to keep a close eye on Evan and protect him, so much so that the two hardly ever left each other's sides. The only times they had parted were at school when they were in separate classes, and Jesus was always waiting outside the classroom to walk Evan to the next one. It was actually kind of sweet. Jesus surprised us, partially with his protectiveness, but mostly how open he was at school about his relationship with Evan. From the second they arrived at school that first day, Jesus acted the same way with Evan that he had acted with Emma, just more tender and sweet while infinitely more protective.

The whole day, I had been sat in my classes with my teeth on edge, waiting for lunch to arrive so I could see Jude. Lunch came and passed. I awaited the end of the school day with baited breath, and when it finally arrived I all but leapt from my seat. Jesus and Evan were waiting for me, but no Jude. I shot them a questioning look.

"Where's Jude?" I asked.

"He went for a walk on the beach." Jesus responded, "Said he was going to the rocks to think."

"Okay, you guys go ahead. I'll find him."

I nodded my thanks and set off to find my missing boyfriend.

My search did not take very long, because for once he was exactly where they said he would be. Jude was just standing there, on top of the rocks. He was frowning, staring out over the water. I cleared my throat to signal my approach without scaring him. He glanced at me and motioned for me to come stand by me.

"You okay?" I asked.

"…Yeah, I think so." He finally answered.

"You can tell me if you're not, you know." I assured him, "I'm your boyfriend, that's what I'm here for."

"I know." He said, grabbing my hand gently in his, "Thanks."

"You're welcome." I said, kissing his cheek.

We sat down on the rocks, hands linked and Jude's head leaning on my shoulder.

"…I'm not okay." Jude mumbled, "I'm scared."

"I'm scared too." I admitted, "With everything that's going on, it's hard not to be."

"I just… we know it is coming." Jude continued, "We all do. This is all going to come to a head, soon, and I'm terrified of what that's gonna entail."

"So am I."

"I'm so tired of having to fight, Connor." Jude said with an exhausted sigh, "Lately that seems like all our family has been doing."

"We're fighting to keep us safe." I interjected, "To keep Evan safe. We're doing the right thing."

"I know we are, but… why does it have to be so damned dangerous?"

I sighed, because I had no real answer to that.

"Well, at least Evan has Jesus and Daniel." Jude said begrudgingly.

I frowned, which Jude immediately noticed.

"What is it?" He asked.

"You know that I don't trust him." I said, "I don't even know what it is, but there's something about him that sets my teeth on edge…"

"…Because he's another of your brothers mysterious contacts?" Jude asked exasperatedly.

"It's not just that!" I protested, "We know next to nothing about this guy. One minute my brother is on the phone, and the next there is a guy showing up at your house in a hooded long coat talking to my brother in code. The guy is enough to give people nightmares, Jude. He stalks around after us, waiting for Evan's dad to make a move, and it makes him seem like he's a Sith Lord stalking his prey."

"… Is that why you whistle the Imperial March every time he enters the room and call him Darth Resilious behind his back?" Jude asked curiously.

"Hey, I didn't come up with Resilious." I objected, "That's the code that my dearest big brother gave him. I asked him why, and he told me it was because Daniel is the most resilient person he knows, so hence Darth Resilious. Besides, with that damned coat of his and the glare he gives to people, it fits."

"If you say so." Jude said.

"…Personally, I think it fits me."

The both of us screech and jump in fright, whipping around to find Daniel standing there. He was staring between us, and for the first time either of us could remember he was not scowling or glaring, and his hood was down.

"You two need to keep a better eye on your surroundings." He cautioned, "I've been standing here since this conversation started, and neither of you noticed. If I'd been somebody with… less than pleasant intentions, you would never have seen me coming."

"Sorry, we just don't make it a habit to expect attack while lounging at the beach." I snarked waspishly, causing Jude to elbow me and shake his head at my rudeness.

"I know you haven't, and you shouldn't have to." Daniel agreed, "But unfortunately you are both unlucky enough to be in the position where you have a psycho after your friend who wouldn't hesitate to hurt you both if it advanced his goals."

We both stayed silent while he spoke, and a shiver of fear jolted down my spine with the truth of his words. It would have been so easy to sneak up and attack us both, and we would not have realized what was happening until it was far too late.

"Sorry." I mumbled.

"Don't apologize." Daniel said, and he sighed, "You both just have to be a little more careful."

"We'll try." Jude said.

Daniel observed us for a couple of seconds, before nodding. He walked over and sat down next to us on the rocks and stared out over the ocean. He breathed the air deeply, and a calm smile crossed his face momentarily.

Then he looked at me and caught me observing him.

"Still don't trust me, huh?" He asked, "Eric said you'd be a tough one."

"It's just…"

"I know, kid. Believe me. I know." Daniel cut me off, "I'm used to people being put off by my demeanor. It is an everyday occurrence. Doesn't help that I mostly do it on purpose."

"Why do you do it on purpose?" I asked.

"Well, I'm a bodyguard." Daniel explained, "Kind of makes sense that I would be intimidating. If everybody is terrified of me, then they'll be less likely to try anything stupid."

The three of us stood together in silence until Jude finally broke it. He turned to Daniel with a sigh.

"What's your plan?" Jude asked.

"What do you mean?" Daniel asked.

"You and Eric are planning something." Jude continued, "I can tell. I've walked in on the two of you talking three times in the last week, and every time you two immediately stop talking."

"I can't tell you that, Jude." Daniel said, "It's already dangerous enough, you knowing would only make it worse. Stef would kill me if I let you two get involved."

Jude observed him for a second.

"You're gonna go after him, aren't you?" Jude asked

"Jude. I literally can't tell you anything." Daniel insisted, "It's too important."

"Daniel…"

"NO, Jude." Daniel shut him down firmly, "You need to focus on yourselves. Focus on keeping yourselves safe. Focus on helping us keep Evan safe. Leave the worrying about catching that psychopath to me and the other adults. When this is all over, I will explain it to you both in great detail, but for now you are both best left ignorant. We are dealing with a raving lunatic who has proven that he will not hesitate to resort to violence and destruction to achieve his goals. You both… Jude, you know what it is like to lose everything. Connor, your family has faced a lot of trauma. By keeping you guys out of it, we prevent more loss and trauma for the both of you. If one of you boys got hurt, I'd never be able to forgive myself."

"So instead, we have to remain ignorant in the dark with no knowledge about how to defend ourselves." Jude finished for him.

"… That's not exactly what I meant." Daniel said, "I'll teach you both how to defend yourselves, don't you worry about that, but I'm not gonna be responsible for teaching the both of you stuff that'll get you thinking you'd be enough to go after him yourselves."

"We may be kids, but we're not stupid." I snark.

"You've both been known to make questionable decisions." Daniel reminded me, "The healed hole in your foot is a decent example of that. You snuck out of the house, broke into another one to drink and you got shot."

I glared at him for the reminder, but he continued on.

"I'm just trying to stop any potential suffering that might be caused by any foolish actions." Daniel continued, "Lord knows that between Jude's losing his mother and foster care, and your Dad putting you through hell due to his trauma, you've both suffered enough in our lives… We all have. Me included."

"How have you suffered?" I asked, causing Jude to elbow me and glare at me.

"Connor, you can't just ask somebody that," He hissed, "That's private stuff."

"It's okay, Jude." Daniel interjected.

"No, it's not!" Jude snapped, "And to be honest, Connor, I'm getting a little bit sick of your attitude! He's trying to help us, protect us and our families, and your treating him like he's just committed high treason!"

"JUDE!" Daniel interrupted, "That's enough!"

Jude huffed in irritation.

"I'll answer your question, Connor." Daniel said, his voice as smooth and cold as glass, "How have I suffered?"

I stared at him, awaiting his answer.

"I lost everything." Daniel said, "In one hour, I lost absolutely everything. My family, my home… everything. The house burnt down with them inside it. Mom, dad, my brothers, the family dog… everything that made up my life reduced to cinders. I only survived because I had snuck out that night to hang with Eric… Does that answer your question?"

I stared at him in abject horror, imagining what he had been through and the sheer amount of anguish he had been through… a pain he must live with every day.

"I… I didn't know." I whispered in horror, "I'm… God, I am so sorry. I cannot imagine… If I lost my family or if I lost J-Jude…"

"You would lose yourself with it." Daniel finished for me. I nodded in agreement, "I'm here to stop that from happening. I am here to stop that crazy fucker from hurting you, or your families, or Jude… Now, we good?"

I nodded. I felt horrible for making him relive what must be the worst day of his life.

"Sorry for being an ass." I said remorsefully, "I feel awful. I have been getting really angry a lot lately for no reason. Everything has just been so bad lately, and it's like this will never end and it's driving me insane."

"…And I accept your apology. I'm keeping that nickname, though." Daniel joked, "Darth Resilous sounds cool. Maybe I'll even change my name to it: Darth Resilous, Lord of Sorrow and Anguish."

I snorted.

"…Good, so we're all friends now." Jude said, his voice dripping with snark and sass, "Now you can stop being an ass, babe."

 

 


End file.
